Lost my shape
trying to act casual
Can't stop
I might end up in the hospital
Changing my shape
I feel like an accident
They're back
to explain their experience
Another Tuesday.... another Taste! Been a long time since we had one of these... and as such now we've got a big one. Yes, despite the ghost-town-like absence of reviews recently here in this hungry corner of the internet, we have somehow reached the sesquicentennial amount of these Tuesday food reviews. The time, it passes by so fast... what began as essentially a hobby to keep myself occupied/semi-sane during COVID-19 darkness has now blossomed and grown into... well, whatever the hell this is now!
But in all seriousness, thank you to everybody who has read, supported, and most importantly... enjoyed these reviews/rants/entertaining descents into madness over the past half decade or so. A lot of you have told me personally or commented how much you dig this stuff and that positive feedback has honestly made the work and effort I've put into this all the more worth it.
Again, so happy (and still surprised) these weird little articles have found an audience and while I can't say with any certainty that going back to a weekly schedule is on the horizon anytime soon... this article you're reading here is something very special I've been working away at for episode #150. Yes, one of my weaknesses is when an idea latches itself upon my brain... I tend to want to see it through to its near perfection before completion. It's definitely a habit that tends to make such projects get completely carried away and take much longer to finish up than initially planned.
As such, this is going to be a very long piece... I promise to be as concise as possible in my descriptions (and we do have a lot of talk about) but understandable if some of you skim the words. I mean, don't do that of course... but I understand if you decide to.
You see, it occurred to me when wondering what to do for this big anniversary episode, that I'd already written about and reviewed dozens of fast food/quick service* burgers. So... why not rank them? Of course, there were still a bunch of renowned/famous ones in Toronto that I'd yet to try/review... thus why the scope of this project quickly got out of hand. I honestly thought I could have this complete in mid-May. Ha! When will I learn.
Nevertheless! We made it, and it's time to share my thoughts and conclusions with all of you. Also, there will be a lots and lots of pictures of burgers in this article. If you are allergic to being bombarded by delicious imagery, you've been warned. Lets go.
*It's also important to mention the distinction of what I mean by "fast food" or "takeaway" burgers, which I'm defining as really any burger that's not from a sit-down type of restaurant. Thus why you're not going to see places like Richmond Station or Allen's on this list: we're looking for the more casual styles here, ones that won't be offered with a wine list... although that said certainly some of the very best on my list here could challenge any fancy-pants burger in town
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#68: A&W's Smash Burger
*various locations*
One of my general rules for this list is that each franchise/chain/entity is only allowed one entrant. It's a rule I'm indeed going to break twice and for exemplary reasons. This is the first exemption, being both legitimately a menu item A&W introduced while I was already undertaking this project (so I obviously had to try the damn thing) and it being so absolutely and unforgettably terrible that not talking about it would be unfair to the many far superior burgers out there.
I generally like A &W compared to the other fast food hamburger giants (and on this side of the border they are Canadian-owned for what it's worth) but their attempt at a smash burger was an impressively limp swing-and-a-miss... a barfing-over-the-borderline insult to the smash style itself. No greasy/crunchy edges, tepid undercooked beef flavour (without even a hint of seasoning). It really falls apart in your hands and is weirdly juicy in a not-comforting way... yet it was like 700 calories somehow? Is that even possible for something to be so flavourless, small, unsatisfying and yet also a condensed bomb of being impressively bad for you?
There are a few burgers on this list that are perhaps a slight bit worse in terms of quality... but this here is just such a complete failure as a smash burger (there wasn't even an interesting sauce) that it blandly struts into its deserved bottom slot of the list. Considering the general consensus how lame this burger was amongst other people I heard from who also tried it, can't imagine they ever bring this special back. They'd be crazy to keep pushing this thing, see ya later forever, never... now off to the airport and...
Warning: burgers may appear more interesting in rear view than in actuality. Please be mindful of your emergency exits.
*various locations*
I'm going purely off memory from my review a few years ago (and the one I inexplicably got in the Amsterdam airport last fall)...
Here's the thing: I do these reviews mostly for free and for fun, but I'm at the point where you'd have to pay me to eat at a Burger King. Nearly everything they offer is tasteless and awful, their flagship burger centre-stage among them.
Which is a shame, because as a young teen I absolutely loved Whoppers. All that mayo, the distinct charbroiled taste... maybe it's one of those things where your sense of taste matures as you do, or that in the span of twenty-five years BK's quality completely fell off a cliff... probably a mix of both, probably a thick broth of the latter.
Nevertheless, the Whopper in its current form is an anemic excuse for a hamburger, even among the underwhelming ranks of the super chains. Doesn't taste like real beef/meat/food, doesn't taste really like anything actually (except water maybe). That trademark char flavour is as faint as a dying star on a cloudy night... and this patty is so thin you're really just getting bun, mayo and ketchup (ecch) most bites. One of the few burgers on this list I might pass on no matter how hungry I was. Desert island? Yeah maybe I'll wait for the rescue plane first. You just don't feel good after eating one of these.
#66: GG's Burgers
1681 Lake Shore Blvd East
Wow. I mean, how do you go from this:
...to this?
And at an extremely inflated price, no less!
WTF. This should be the worst burger on the list by virtue of being, by far, the biggest disappointment. By quality it's already right there. GG's was the only one I honestly hated after my first bite. At least the Whopper once had nostalgic glory and the A&W Smash was an intriguing idea just executed lazily. Both of those are interesting in their respective badness (and were cheaper) which earns them some minor tokens of minimal respect.
This is the only burger I tried that legit unsettled me... like made me actually slightly angry at what I was served. The singular time that charging actual money for this bottom-shelf level of clearly frozen, supermarket quality pre-formed burger (those veins give it away instantly) is acceptable, would be a community/local school or church BBQ fundraiser where all the proceeds go towards a good cause... and even then you'd be raising an eyebrow if they were selling these for five bucks each. This was FIFTEEN DOLLARS... in fact a nudge more than that because I tipped. There's a good chance this is among the most expensive burgers on this list... which indeed makes me more than slightly angry.
It's a sham (allegedly). I reviewed this place five years ago (as you could see above) and we're talking a completely different level of quality and purpose here. Something must've happened (*cough* different ownership) that saw how well regarded these burgers were, kept the well regarded name (and beach-side location) and immediately slashed the food budget to the point that they keep their bags of Dempsters buns all along the ordering counter... not to mention collections of various equipment/junk that blocks their original entrance (even the sign is in severe disrepair). Just an obvious sign of this place and its ownership not giving two farts beyond tricking people for an overpriced nothing burger (allegedly).
Too bad. They were legitimately very good five years ago and I was going back as a refresh to gauge where on this list they'd land... I had thoughts this could be a dark horse Top 25. That burger had character, enjoyable nuance on each bite... and you know... a taste! Good thing I did go back, because what a fool I'd have looked to have ranked apathetic cynicism like this so high.
Even among frozen burgers you cook on your stove, this still sucks. Drippy and wet (with some bizarre flavourless liquid that ain't meat juice or a sauce) to the point everything gets soggy, no seasoning whatsoever, no char taste... nothing remotely memorable about it beyond your own regret on spending money on it.
F**k this place. Do not ever go, ever... you've worked hard for the money you've earned, don't give it to this flimsy facade that cannot even be bothered to keep their inside semi-presentable. The burger itself is at least a bare-bones level of edible (yet suspiciously unfilling despite its size) while the insult goes beyond unforgivable.
#65: Queen's Charbroiled
1225 Queen Street East
It's almost unfair to include this one on the list, this being more a shawarma place than a burger spot (you can tell by the toppings they offer) and I really only tried it because of how often I'm in this general part of town. I also wouldn't have bothered writing about it at all... except that it was so terrible that I feel compelled to at least mention that fact.
Yeah, it's really bad. The shawarma toppings (the smokey hot, hummus and garlicky sauces particularly) help to give this thing some interesting character... but the proper burger elements of this are awfully damn sad. The beef has that unmistakable "this was made in a factory" taste, texture and consistency... like it reminded me of a sausage patty you'd find on a frozen breakfast sandwich. The heavy handed cheesiness of this does its best to try and cover all that beef badness up (it's a very fake nacho-like cheesiness) and I liked this soft sorta-fresh kaiser bun... but a bad beef burger is a bad beef burger and there's nowhere to run away from that. Not a great sign when you're getting heartburn before you've even finished it. Sorry but no thanks to this. Ecch.
#64: Square Boy
875 Danforth Avenue
Iconic... a legend... but stick with the Greek food, folks. I've had a burger from Square Boy now twice in my life, well over a decade apart (I used to live pretty closeby for the first)... and I have not enjoyed it much either time.
The problem is the patty and especially the texture. Too much of a bready filling (like you'd find in a meatloaf) that makes the meat of the burger unpleasantly soft (it should be noted that yes, I tried the more expensive "homemade" burger rather than the regular one). When you think of a cheeseburger you're not expecting to be chewing through something with the consistency and juiciness of a dense cake.
It's not all bad. My long time occasional food-trying companion noted the peppery gyro-like seasonings in play, the burger has some decent char to it... and the bacon is actually very good and most definitely stole the show. But that mushiness in the burger patty is just so off-putting... no thanks.
#63: McDonald's Quarter Pounder
*various locations*
If you've been reading my work the past half decade, you've surely noticed that I've just never been a McDonald's fan... a stance which only intensified as I got into the food reviewing game. Everything I've eaten from the Golden Arches has this weird, oily trademark taste that is unmistakably McD's... but I do not like it, Sam I Am. Not even with green eggs and ham.
Again going off memory of years ago (like the Whopper) I recall a pretty unremarkable, fake tasting hamburger with too much ketchup hiding the lack of flavour, gaining very little enjoyment while eating it (it does seem like my proper review felt similarly). I have very little else to say about this so let's move on.
#62: Jolibee's Yumburger
*various locations*
I recalled not liking this one bit when I did my initial review/visit (and first ever time trying) Jolibee. They're a fried chicken place (and a pretty decent one)... that they have cheeseburgers too does come across as a quirky secondary thing.
I'm glad I tried the Yumburger again because doing so saved it from the very bottom of the list, as there is a certain uniqueness to it compared to the other entrants here in the sewers of the ranking. There's an oniony, TV dinner Salisbury steak taste to it... plus a rather sweet burger/mayo sauce that has a nice little tangy/honey mustard hit.
Still not a good burger, however. The processed cheese didn't even slightly melt either time and I feel like eating more than one of these could have my stomach doing back flips. Stick with the chicken and the pineapple drink.
#61: South St. Burger
*various locations*
Quality-wise, it should be a little higher on the list (just a little)... but this was legitimately undercooked (like medium-ish) and it's not like that quality was blowing me away. Like eating a juicy but not great or remotely beefy steak that's been morphed into a crumbly, rather unflavoured/unseasoned burger patty. Pretty bad, plus I did not feel too great the next day either. I mean look at it... this was only ten minutes later.
#60: Harry's Drive-In
2280 Lawrence Avenue East
Another legendary old-school institution in the east side that also does Greek food like Square Boy... and like Square Boy they have the exact same problem: that bread-filling in the burger patty ruins the texture and robs the beef of any presence or flavour.
Too bad, because the place is unbelievably charming. Like a little truck stop in an unassuming western Scarborough plaza, the inside is tiny without anywhere to sit beyond some picnic benches outside. The burger itself does have some good char to it, helping along the mostly bready flavour... and the toasty sesame seed bun is a very pleasant touch. It's just more squishy mush than juice, sadly, which is simply something I'm not looking for in a beef burger (a veggie burger, sure). Once again the cheese and the bacon carry this thing into the "meh" realm almost completely by themselves.
#59: Dairy Queen's Grillburger
*various locations*
Even greasier than it looks, which is pretty damn impressive.
It's definitely not great... but at least it tastes like a proper generic beef burger (unlike most of the previous entries on this list) plus all that sauce and cheese definitely boost the overall intensity of the flavour (even if said-flavour is really heavy and not-so-good). Better than you'd think it would be, but that's a lightyear from an actual recommendation. It looks like a heart palpitation.
#58: McDonald's Big Mac
*various locations*
The second exception I'm making for a brand having two entries on the list, to which I'd say this one is pretty self-explanatory. Probably the most famous fast food burger on the planet Earth, definitely in North America... but the Quarter Pounder is likewise well known enough that it seemed appropriate to include both of them on the list.
As a vocal non-fan of McDonald's, yeah it shouldn't surprise you to hear that I'm not all that keen on the Big Mac either. I'll happily eat one instead of a Quarter Pounder (or a Royale with Cheese if you're Pulp Fictiony) because at least a Big Mac has some interesting aspects going on. The sauce, the lettuce, the unusual composition... but it still has that distinct weird/fake food McDonald's taste to it and I'm simply not a fan. On the scale of classic American double burgers, this is low level riding-the-bus minor leagues compared to a big league superstar In-N-Out Double Double.
#57: Johnny's Hamburgers
2595 Victoria Park Avenue
I'm sure several people are going to/dismiss my list already for having these famous long time Toronto burger stalwarts so low, this one possibly having the most ardent advocates in its corner. A former friend of mine who worked nearby in the 2010s raved about them endlessly.
For the record and in my defence, there is a considerable gap between #58 and #57 here. Johnny's Hamburgers hasn't exactly impressed me either time I've tried them, although the very recent second time was notably better than the first.
My theory is that certain places that become so well known for so long, tend to get considerably overrated both by the locals and via farther away visitors who fall in love with the retro charm (and with Johnny's, their wildly retro prices that are three decades behind the times). This is another place where I like the vibe, the character and the history far more than the food itself. They don't offer lettuce on their burgers because of an intentional tradition, for instance. Places like this are what make Toronto such a rich, wonderfully interesting city.
Once again we have a meatloaf, bread crumb filling in the beef patty... which again I just am not into. Thankfully it's not overwhelming like with Square Boy and Harry's Drive-In, giving the burger some needed firmness, decent juiciness and a solid hint of char. It's also extremely greasy, something you'd definitely expect from a place that opened in the 1960s but really is the first old school spot on this list that has utilized that touch. A true dirty hamburger, tasting of an old grill and the lack of green vegetables sure does amplify that.
Glad it ended up being better than I remembered and it has a very particular type of appeal. Objectively it's... meh? I will say this is not the kind of burger that would travel well, and Johnny's is extremely small without any seating whatsoever (there's barely room to stand inside and they're constantly busy)... so chomp away while its hot if this is your jam.
*various locations*
It's Wendy's. Consistently and reliably meh/okay. The burgers don't have a whole lot of flavour and often seem to have a pale colour and limp texture... but it actually tastes like cooked beef and you pretty much know what you're going to get every time. The definition of a C+ cheeseburger that neither excites or disappoints anyone. There's something dependable in that, I suppose.
#55: Harvey's Original with Cheese
*various locations*
I think I had this notion that Harvey's is a fair bit better than it actually is... but maybe there's a KFC/Burger King-like diminishing quality thing happening here because it's been about a decade since I was impressed/felt a genuine craving for one of these.
I've found that a lot of people are one way or the other on Harvey's: they either really like them, or that heavy-handed grill/char flavour is not their thing. Naturally... I'm more in the middle, with the caveat I liked them considerably more about fifteen years ago. It really is that flavour: Harvey's burgers are fairly one dimensional and I've found both the texture and the taste of beef have really lost their edge over time.
It's neat that they have such a variety of toppings and sauces you can put on the thing (I do appreciate that visual choose your own burger adventure thing) but the burgers themselves just don't have a lot of depth/anything else going on beyond the one trick.
#54: Big Smoke Burger
*various locations*
Feel like this was a mini-chain that used to have a lot more going on... like more of a positive reputation and presence before the Great Smash Burger Revolution hit the 416. Now they're just kind of this forgotten place on King West with only a couple other locations left as I type this in 2026.
Which makes sense, as this is an extremely solid but forgettable entry. The people watching the World Cup on their television that sunny afternoon were far more memorable than the burger itself. Quite a beefy scent to it that doesn't translate to the actual flavour, which is a shame as "smoke" is in the actual name of the place. I would've expected some of that in the taste (sadly it belongs exclusively to the smoked cheddar on here, which also doesn't have much punch) while the condiments are about as generic grocery store mayo and mustard as you'll find.
The beef has more of a spongey texture than a juicy one, also a minor disappointment... all of this tastes totally fine but it's more on the level of a burger you'd have at a weekend picnic get-together and never think about again. We're very much in the lower end of the "mid" tier at this point and this one nails that benchmark.
#53: A&W's Teen Burger
*various locations*
Yeah, when it comes to the behemoths of fast food burgers I've always been an A&W fanboy. Not that I love them unconditionally and eat there every other day or even week (just go read what I wrote about the burger taking up the rear of the list) but I've always, for the most part, found their options reliably decent.
While I prefer the Mozza Burger (which is basically a more interesting version of the Teen) this to me is their trademark burger and so is the one we're ranking. Teen Burgers often hit the spot! There's almost always a strong hint of seasoning salt in A &W's hamburgers and a decent fatty taste, which while a bit much is at least some kind of seasoning unlike most of the spots mentioned so far. Not a fan of their price-to-quality aspect either, although among the big chains they are by far the champions of offering some appealing deals if you can hunt down the coupons.
Obviously, there are literal dozens of places better in this city (and this list)... but you could do a lot worse as well. In a pinch and on a day the bacon strips aren't too stale/chewy and the beef patty hasn't been sitting in those drawer things too long... a Teen burger can be a moderately good time.
#52: Blaze Burger
208 Queens Quay West
A random place on Queens Quay I pass by all the time on my way to-and-from work... figured it was worth a visit.
Definitely a contender for the messiest burger on this list. So saucy! Not helped by the shredded lettuce either. Kinda has that Wendy's style of fattier, gristle tasting beef that doesn't have much else going on, especially with all the toppings dominating nearly every bite (there are even banana peppers on this thing).
Overall, pretty decent... but also a lot of "meh whatever" once you dive deeper into the core aspects of the burger, what with there not being much in the way of char or beefiness. Memorable more for the mess than the taste.
*various locations*
There's a notable jump in quality here between #52 and #51, even if I still wasn't all that blown away here.
It's an okay, unremarkable smash burger (though at least it's actually done properly, *cough* A&W *cough*). Good flavour and texture but not a whole lot else going on for it. The caramelized onions steal the show big time. I'm sure I had more to say in my proper review but off the top of my head, I don't remember basically anything else beyond what I just wrote. This was only a year ago I tried it too. Oh well. Moving on!
*various locations*
I've always felt Hero is a little too ambitious for their own good. The everything bagel-like buns, the variety of speciality burgers that come across as convoluted... like they're trying way too hard to convince you they're much more elegant than they actually are.
Personally... I've generally enjoyed Hero Burger over the years. As the burger scene in Toronto has evolved and elevated they've been perhaps a little left behind doing their same thing (and indeed I feel like there are considerably less locations now then there were a decade ago) but that same thing is pretty solid and I quite like the real juiciness you get in their burgers. Too clever for their own good? A bit... but I cannot recall a time I was severely disappointed by anything I ordered from them.
#49: Farm Boy Smash Burger
*various locations*
Okay okay okay... I'm putting a freaking supermarket on the list? The hell? It's the only one, I swear... plus most Farm Boy stores I know of do make and offer these smash burgers.
For a cheap-ish supermarket smash burger... it's sneakily decent. You've got the greasy texture and the crumbly edges, the cheddar is well melted, lots of ground beef flavour that isn't mind-blowing (not much seasoning) but when paired with a tasty soft potato bun and an inspired amount of soft (almost gooey) caramelized onions... this is like a solid ground-floor introductory smash burger. Welcome to the lobby. Like if you're unfamiliar with the style, here's a good hand-shake that won't scare you away.
#48: Jumbo Burgers
685 Runnymede Road
Finally, one of the old school west end spots! Despite living near Runnymede and St. Clair for over a year (my first apartment on my own) and playing baseball in that same area for over twenty years now... I'd only managed to try Jumbo once a long time ago, without being all that impressed at the time.
Jumbo might be the most like stepping into a Time Machine amidst these classic places (it's this or Johnny's generationally old prices) as those tiled walls and orange-tinted decor is so 1970s you can still smell the shag carpeting and cigarette smoke that isn't even there (anymore at least).
This was a pleasant surprise, even to a minor degree. Thankfully Jumbo does not have that meatloaf/bready filling to it like so many of those other old school places, giving this a much more tender and heavy beefier taste in the burger... plus the size does live up to the moniker.
The flavour does fade pretty quick and isn't exactly robust to begin with... but surprisingly I found this a much more positive experience than I'd anticipated/feared (I don't mean to slag these old spots I swear! Just commenting on what I tasted, all). Jumbo Burger is like, imagine you're making your own burgers for a backyard BBQ by getting whatever generic beef from the supermarket... quality-wise it's not outstanding but you do know what you're doing as a cook so the result is something simple but tasty that everyone will likely enjoy.
#47: The Burger's Priest
*various locations*
Take it away, Sir Connery.
My thoughts exactly. On merit, Burger's Priest should probably be half a dozen slots higher at least... but frankly I've just never understood the hype. Way back before they expanded to a zillion locations everywhere, when the solitary store was the one down here in the Beaches (which has since moved several blocks east on Queen)... I went with my friend (and occasional food trying companion blah blah blah) and after waiting in line for a bit (which was a serious thing back then with Priest)... I recall liking it a lot but not exactly having my mind blown (I did spend a lot of my childhood in California, where In-N-Out spoiled me good on these types of burgers).
On subsequent visits, my thoughts have pretty much remained unchanged. Yeah, it's a fine burger no question... but the whole vibe is so full of itself that it turns me off, especially having had far better burgers in this style well before Toronto was flooded with them.
I was even all set to give them one more chance for this project (it'd been quite a while, probably my proper review) since I'd tried them, so I thought I'd stop at the Beaches one after work on a recent Saturday night. Both Google and the sign outside said "open until midnight", it was 11:15, the open sign was lit up and the door unlocked.... but nope! The dude said they were closed and himself seemed incredulous I'd have the nerve to wander in despite, um... all the obvious signs and evidence leading me to think they'd be open. Like, maybe turn off the OPEN sign? Or the lights? Or lock the door? Geez. I was really damn hungry too.
So forget it. Not worth it! Even if they were as good as I remembered I doubt they're cracking my Top 35 here regardless. Lots of really, really damn good burgers on the back half of this list and none of them are nearly this pretentious either. Burger's Priest is fine whatever, but I'm not a fan personally and never really have been.
#46: Apache Burgers
5236 Dundas Street West
If Jumbo is like stepping into the 1970s, Apache is like wandering into the 1950s. Neither place accepts debit cards either so bring them paper moneys.
Apache is worth the trip alone for the atmosphere of the place, with countless pictures of NHL players dining there on the wall (among various other local celebrities) and frankly, among all these old school Toronto burger spots, this feels like the one that embraces its own legend the most.
This is another one that was much better than I'd expected. After Square Boy and Harry's Drive-In, I was expecting more of that mushy meatloaf burger with little flavour. Apache has its flaws sure, mostly just overall quality and lingering depth... but its singular trick (tasting and smelling like an old greasy grill) is genuinely appealing and not too overdone. The kaiser bun touch is a positive, the beef is crumbly and tastes fairly fresh/unfrozen... legitimately enjoyable from first bite to last. Not the kind of cheeseburger I'd want to subject my arteries to on a semi-regular basis (it's reeeeeeal heavy) but a really pleasant surprise. Solid.
#45: Burgers Park
10 William Sylvester Drive
Who? Where? Unless you're an avid explorer of North York or happen to work at the 'very 9-5 office job' Consumers Road part of town... I'm wagering that you've never heard of this place. Fair, because neither had I! They've got a few thousand Instagram followers and I was heading up to that area to give Johnny's a fairer shot anyway...
It's a smash burger (get used to hearing that a whole lot in these final few dozen rankings) and an entirely good but unremarkable one at that. Nails the texture with the crisp greasy edges and the American cheese perfectly melted, however there's not much flavour in the beef itself (needs more seasoning). This is also quite fatty beef, which the frills of the burger (in particular a tangy dijonaisse) disguise rather well. Rather small/unfilling in size as well, although this was one of the cheaper entries (ten bucks tax and tip in) so can't complain much there. The Park Burger is also a fine name for your featured item.
The thought occurred to me how smash burgers are a lot like pizzas from wood-fire ovens: it's rather hard to mess it up to the point it's outright bad, thus there's a solid quality floor... but it's arguably harder to make one that truly excels above that good-ish level. The majority of the ones I tried are more than acceptable but simply aren't that memorable. As such, so many of them blend together in my recollection and this (aside from that nice dijoinaisse) most definitely falls in that tier.
#44.5: Lick's Homeburgers (RIP)
*photo courtesy of Old Ontario Series
Yeah, they've been gone from Toronto for a long while now (and in fact the very last one up in Parry Sound closed up shop back in March 2025) and they'd slipped notably in quality well before that... but I couldn't do a big article about all of Toronto's famous fast food burgers and not mention Lick's at all.
They were fun. In my days of visiting the Toronto Beaches as a teenager (well before I moved down here), visiting the Lick's was often a must. What a scene: the staff famously singing your name and your order, the tempting ice cream counter right in the waiting area... a perfect accompaniment to a summer afternoon or evening by the lake. A few years later when one opened up in the Annex (Spadina just south of Bloor), I was overjoyed. I was hanging out in that area a lot at the time and more than once did I sneak in some Homeburgers into the Madison Avenue Pub to accompany some pints.
It's difficult to separate the nostalgia from how good their burgers actually were, especially when it's both been so long and that the last time I had one was from a Scarborough location widely regarded to be pretty bad. From what I recall... they were thick, hearty burgers with a considerable amount of extra flavours within the pattys. Some mix of seasonings and possibly finely minced peppers (the recipe does seem to be a secret taken to the grave) molded into the burger, giving their Homeburger a rather distinctive taste that no other place on this list has really approached at all. I haven't even mentioned their infamous 'Guk!' sauce yet either (which I bought from a Metro supermarket more than once I'm sure) or their extremely good meatless option the Natureburger.
Whether or not they were as good as I remember (and we're talking good not great here anyhow) isn't really the point, moreso it's really about how genuinely memorable they were. A cap tip to a legend...
...except, perhaps they weren't quite as in the grave as I'd previously assumed. Fast forward to September of 2026 (a couple months after I'd written the obituary above) and looky here:
It's zombie burger! Shoot it in the head! Or... smother it with ketchup! Then you know it's dead!
This is from the Food Building during the 2026 CNE. I'd been told by some co-workers that Lick's indeed was back and operational via this stand within the crowded and labyrinth-like Food Building on the Exhibition grounds. Hey, here's one point in my favour for dawdling so long on this project. How does Lick's properly hold up here in 2026, after all these years and memories have passed us by?
It was nice to see the same thickness in their Homeburger patties that I recalled with such fondness, and I'd completely forgotten their method of using shredded cheese rather than thin slices (plus they put the shreds of cheese on the bun after the burger has been cooked, resulting in a more immediate yet isolated cheese presence within the texture rather than it being a gooey delight everywhere).
Aside from that... yeah sorry but some things are indeed at their best when they live in the past. This wasn't completely horrible or anything, but it was far from good and the primary reason being: that bready meatloaf-like filling often used to fill out cheaper burgers is unmistakable in this thing. The patty is very soft, the taste not all that beefy or hamburgery beyond the simple flavour of char... it's all a single note lacking subtly or nuance and I'm clearly not a fan of that note.
That lack of depth in the flavour leads me to strongly believe these were probably slightly pre-cooked and frozen beforehand... to which yeah it's also a stall in the Food Building during the CNE, with like tens of thousands of people wandering in and out every day... I can't be too mad about that or anything. Hey, the bun (quite kaiser-like) was solid and the infamous Guk sauce (like a herby, garlicky Caesar dressing only in a mayo form) still holds up as a positively delicious burger spread.
Maybe Lick's can indeed find a way to come back more permanently in the future here in Toronto but if that happens, they'll have to be quite a bit better than this. Even though this isn't even a real ranking on this list (translation: I've been wasting your time via you reading this the past five minutes, sorry) on quality alone this would be a bottom twelve burger. The nostalgia (and the Guk!) are giving it this considerable grace.
#44: Burger Factory
*various locations*
The one I went all the way to Port Credit to try! (thanks to my dad for the lift there). Burger Factory, like Big Smoke, used to have more of a presence in downtown Toronto (think Factory had a spot on the Danforth) but appear to be hanging on still with their remaining, more outskirts-y, locations.
Very beefy! Which is good. Brioche bun is a fine touch (hard to go wrong) and there's a solid ground beef texture in the patty as well. Smothered in hugs! I mean, cheese. A bit simple, lacking any touch of char or pepper to it, but still quite firm and tasty nonetheless. A very average entry on the list, which is a compliment considering the beefy middle of sheer goodness ahead (pun very much intended).
#43: Brgr Barn's SMPL Burger
1075 Martin Grove Road
Definitely a name that's going to sound real weird if you say it out loud and nobody knows what you're referring to. Also proof that, along with Burger Factory and Johnny's, that I was willing to travel out to any corner of Toronto to get this project absolutely right without any bun unturned. This place is 30 kilometres from my house! Helps that I have a friend who drives and lives out in Etobicoke near Islington... but nevertheless!
This was a slight disappointment. I'd been sent a rave video review of this place, how this spot adjacent to a Rexdale gas station is a true hidden gem and among Toronto's very very best... so I was naturally intrigued.
Instead... entirely solid but lacking the true ooomph required to escape this particular tier (and it's a very cluttered tier). A ketchup and relishy burger sauce, extremely oniony taste (smashed into the burger), pretty thin patty but still quite beefy... again a perfectly good burger but not something I'd venture out into the complete diagonally opposite side of town to revisit. The fries, covered in a delicious parmesan drizzle sauce, were far more memorable to me (they were indeed excellent fries).
Also, this place must just be allergic to vowels right? What other explanations could there be... maybe whoever came up with the name and the menu had the hiccups at the time?
#42: The Real McCoy
3300 Lawrence Avenue East
Probably the best 'feel good' story of the entire list: beloved (and important) Scarborough neighbourhood restaurant sadly closes after decades (because condos gonna condo) only to be quickly reborn nearby under the same stewardship, with the help of a new and passionate co-owner.
As a burger it's... totally fine. Veering on good, I'd say. It's huge, tastes plenty of charcoal and grill (in a good way) with enough tenderness and juice to keep each bite interesting enough. Mind-blowing? Hardly. It's much too no frills and simple for that. Endlessly likeable? Undeniably. This is the opposite of Burgers Priest for me, wherein quality-wise this should easily be half a dozen slots lower but McCoy has such an abundance of old restaurant charm that I'll gladly slip them into this spot. Plus, their pizza is surprisingly solid too. What's not to love.
#41: The Burger Shop
960 Queen Street West
There was once another burger place (a burger "shop" if you will) carrying the exact same name... well with some extra letters to make it sound homey I suppose? No connection, as surely there can be only one, correct? Anyone? I'm not sure how this works, my only Sean Connery clips are from a film far less than extraordinary.
We're at a spot on this ranking where things jump up in quality a fair bit, the happy simple middle of the list. Burger Shop is certainly on the thumbs up side of this arena... but I wasn't quite blown away either.
Also possible I did it wrong? Their thing seems to be their choice/selection of what gets smashed into the beef patty, mushrooms or jalapeños or (classic) onions. I chose none of the above, thinking both how a truly good hamburger doesn't depend upon secondary attractions, and also that my stomach was in one of its temperamental swings. Simplicity was the key.
I mean... it's an entirely fine burger but the beef has absolutely nothing to it. What a shame. It is drippy as a faucet, plenty of greasiness in there too, with a good fried texture on the outside. All that is good, as is the decent beefy texture. But the only tastes are that fried greasiness and the slightly dijon BSS (Broken Social Burger Shoppe Sauce). It's a fatty burger so tenderness was never really on the menu, I just don't get much on the beef that lingers or gets all that deep into my taste buds. The supporting elements (pillowy fresh brioche bun, legit cheddar cheese melted just right, pickle presence) are really on point too... what a weird one.
#40: Crack Burger
147 Baldwin Street
Another friend's recommendation that, while tasty with respectable quality... didn't quite "wow" me all that much. Definitely hits the mark for what it's doing, just felt like it's missing something. A missing touch to really elevate/deepen it into the elite tier, as this is a pretty straightforward burger that isn't quite as mesmerizing on the final bite as it is on the first. It's good, and the experience of being there was pretty memorable... but the list gets pretty jumbled with a lot of good-just-short-of-great entries and that's where I am with this one.
Crack Burger is one that is so primarily meat-forward and I suspect many other people like that type of burger more than I typically do. Terrific for what it is, just not for me.
#39: Shamrock Burgers
6109 Kingston Road
Like Harvey's with more substance... not sure what I meant by that but it's in my notes I wrote in the moment, damn it!
Okay, it's probably because it's quite juicy with considerable char taste and texture along the outside... like a tasty backyard bbq burger with a firm feel and very grilled taste. Nothing fancy whatsoever, just a straight up char burger that has the similar notes of a higher quality pre-frozen burger (and if so, impressive that it has such a solid lingering flavour). Another one of Scarborough's old school spots (this one opened in the 1970s) and by far the one I enjoyed the most. Was very happy to be this impressed.
#38: Five Guys Burgers And Fries
*various locations*
A place I really, really liked when I first tried and reviewed them in 2022 (I mean, look at that thing), recalling a tender, flavourful burger heavy on the cheese and satisfaction. I figured this was a good bet for a Top 20 slot... until I (smartly) decided upon trying them again just to be absolutely certain.
When your fake cheese simply refuses to melt (despite this burger also taking over ten minutes for them to make) it's simply not a good sign for optimism.
This latter Five Guys cheeseburger ended up being rather decent, in spite of its lacklustre appearance here... but I was far from blown away like I was four years ago. It's like a good burger with a decent quality baseline that doesn't try whatsoever to be great in any way, thus the overall experience was quite underwhelming. There's some good lingering beefy flavour to each bite and it's still as good from the first chomp to the last... just that none of this screams "excellence" like its reputation (and fanbase) suggests. Sorry, but the photographic evidence here says it all. Like, where'd all the sesame seeds go?
#37: No Bull Burgers
1019 Kingston Road
Strong quality, plenty tasty... not all that memorable amongst this logjam of reliable non-all-star starting players. Probably looks better than it is, because it really does look fantastic. Don't even have any notes for it and despite trying it only back in April... I really cannot remember much else about it beyond general simplicity. Definitely a good quality burger though, for what it lacks in distinctiveness.
#36: Mama's Boys Burgers
480 Danforth Road
A late addition to the list (wasn't even planning to try them until near the end of the quest) Mama's Boys, while relatively new (a decade?) has the charm and atmosphere of a longtime neighbourhood stalwart with the vibe of regulars and chatty staff that suggests an institution popular throughout many generations.
If not for a photo of a Doug Ford visit on the wall I would've completely adored this place... and I still kinda do regardless. Also helps that the staff was ridiculously nice (recommending to me the "Mama's Sauce", a homemade garlicky mayo right up my alley) and especially that the burger was both tasty and interesting.
I've talked about these 'meatloaf' burgers and their rather hollow texture and flavour... but this was more like a meatball: that particular type of juicy firm meatiness, hints of onion and fennel seed. The beef flavour isn't all that abundant (a-bun-dant, see what I did there) but there's enough else going on that I'm more than happy to forgive that (at least mostly), especially with the toasted edges of the sesame seed bun. So glad this one was actually good because the 99.9 percent of the place itself is bottomless in its charm.
#35: Elijah's Automatic
821 The Queensway
To be honest, I'm thinking spots 35-20 (or so) on this list are close to interchangeable... it's the slightest nuance to separate any of these from each other and so please keep in mind the gulf in enjoyment and quality between #34 and #20 is going to be substantially less than, say, #47 and #55. Don't be personally offended if a spot you have as a personal favourite isn't even Top 25! At this point, these places are all at minimum pretty darn good.
Elijah's Automatic is Shant Mardirosian's return into the world of hamburgers, it having worked out rather well for him the first go-around with Burgers Priest (my underwhelming feelings about them aside, they were a local sensation way back when). Elijah's is also a fairly different style of burger than that, veering away from the idea of the "Classic American cheeseburger" and focusing more on making a meat-forward, fire kissed burger that drips with smoke (and fat).
It is pretty good and delivers a solid amount of those promised flavours, plus the unique design/layout of the place is so bizarrely memorable that it's going to leave an impression regardless of how you feel about the burger. Like a haunted mansion met an artsy cheeseburger gallery.
The focus on the burger is so on all that beef (especially when there isn't a whiff of lettuce or green vegetable on here) that this thing overall is a bit of a one trick pony... as well executed though that trick may be. I'd definitely have it again but it's not calling out to me either.
#34: The Works
*various locations*
A chain that has felt adjacent to a particular past era of my life and thus I always associate them with that time, despite really only trying them once that entire time. Yet I'd never actually order anything to eat at The Works, despite visiting often, for the simple reason I was very very broke and accordingly cheap back then. Tried them once, liked it quite a bit... and the entire experience has faded well beyond the grasp of my memory.
Fast forward... thirteen years? Yikes. Anyhow, fast forward to this current crazy year and this current crazy burger project. My Occasional (Yet Frequent) Food Trying Associate, whom herself worked at the Front/Wellington Works, was intrigued by my interest in including them for this list and wanted to be involved. Indeed yeah... The Works are not quite the type of "quick service" burger I'd imagined to qualify for this list... but they do have several locations still and that's good enough for me.
We went to the one in St. Catharines, managed to score a solid lunch hour special despite being over an hour late for it (shout out to our awesome server who was absolutely delightful) and away we went. This is their "W" Burger, which seems appropriate for me to judge it as a flagship.
There's a lot going on here but I'll try to stick with the basics. The beef patty is rather overshadowed by all this stuff (in particular some stellar bacon) but on the bites I do get of it were indeed beefy, nicely seasoned with salt/pepper, light char to the taste and just the right amount of juiciness. Quite a bit better than we had expected.
Not anything really wrong with it... I suppose the bun is just okay-ish and the Works sauce is rather thin and drippy (a bit of a sweet mayo hint but there needs to be a bit more of it). Regardless, this is a quality burger that hit the spot very nicely. Probably about a dozen spots higher on the list than I'd perhaps wagered, if we're snakes and laddersing it.
#33: Smacks Burger Bar
1606 Queen Street East
Look, there are going to be more than a couple "Huh??? What and where the hell is that place???" on this here list if you're not at all familiar with Toronto's east end. It's just the nature of where I live so it's easier for me to go try-and-wait-I-mean um... uh... my acute sense of proximity to Toronto's very best burgers! Yes, that should stick.
Smacks fits into a category of being a fairly new addition to the Queen/Coxwell junction* right across the street from the magic mushroom shop! I only found out about Smacks, no joke, while I was waiting for the Queen streetcar on the south side of the street and noticed this shiny new burger joint blaring its existence before me. Couldn't not try it, could I not? Yes... that should stick...
It's another smash burger... what a surprise. But, it is a quality one. Loved the touch of the fried edges along the otherwise soft bun, burger has lots of char taste (less so beef) and the patty is very crumbly (the whole thing is quite messy on a very related note). A light sweet mayo is prominent as your burger sauce here, plus some shredded lettuce... and that's it! Very simple, very well executed, quite good. The beef itself is a bit lacking in flavour beyond just the char and grease, which is really my only knock against this.
Smacks also has a fried chicken sandwich which I tried and... was immediately unimpressed to bite into a semi-hollow shell... but that's not the list we're doing here today, or ever, probably? I'm sure I know which way my arteries will vote.
*Not I would... put my foot in my mouth repeatedly during this blurb. Nope.
#32: Riverside Burgers
688 Queen Street West
The remnants from another very different era of Toronto burger... Riverside Burgers is the current iteration of what once was BQM (the menus are eerily identical)... which in its heyday featured a handful of locations throughout central Toronto just a decade or so ago.
Riverside keeps up that tradition as this is likewise a good one for sure, this burger here (their namesake Riverside Burger) being surprisingly light and tender despite its thickness (not a smash) and fattiness. There's nothing particularly outstanding about it but this is just solid all the way through. Maybe a little light on the beef considering the size of the bun and toppings, but I enjoyed essentially every aspect of this. Nothing to blow you away, just very well done.
#31: Woody's Burgers Bar and Grill
3795 Lakeshore Boulevard West
I don't much recall how precisely this one tasted (not like a wrote a review or anything) beyond that I liked it well enough for it to end up here on the edge of the Top 30. Interesting place, the burger hit the spot, positive feelings all around... aside from the sketchy Long Branch fella who tried to hustle me for my entire meal the instant I sat down (he got an onion ring in the end but it was an irritating haggle to get him to F-off with even that).
Back to the burger... just a very complete and balanced one. The beef is good (there's a subtle smokiness) while it's the on point execution of bun, cheese and other toppings that really elevate it into this slot... resulting in a pretty good burger. Certainly this and all those lakeshore parks are reason enough to visit Long Branch... just keep your onion rings close.
#30: Slayer Burger
*various locations*
You know it's really hard to remember how I felt about a lot of these burgers in the modest middle of the list... especially when I tried the place only once and it was a few years ago. The Riverside Slayer (great name for a horror film as an aside) for instance, stands out considerably more in my mind for its wicked mural than what their burger actually tasted like.
Nevertheless, it sure does look pretty good and my foggy recollections are mostly positive. As always, more detailed thoughts can be found in my actual review. Catch Riverside Slayer! Coming, summer 2027... this time life isn't but a dream...
#29: Matty's Patty's Burger Club
923a Queen Street West
Hype and celebrity are powerful things, certainly when it comes to very famous (and semi-local) chefs opening up burger shoppes in very trendy parts of town.
I generally find Matty Matheson quite pleasant when I see him on screen for things (if a little insistent upon himself), he seems like a genuinely passionate dude about he does. My esteemed Occasional Food Trying Associ-blah blah blah reminded me of Parts and Labour in Parkdale, particularly its brief spinoff P&L Burger... which was simply sensational for that brief moment in time.
That was a terrific fancy burger condensed into its most accessible fast form, whereas Matty's Patty's is a straight romanticized homage of a classic American cheeseburger in its heaviest, most nostalgic form.
Matty's Patty's has some distinct qualities I like: the sesame seed bun, a very classic American burger sauce that's heavy on the mustard and pickles (not to mention cheese and onions) while the beef is also of a strong quality and shines through nicely on each bite.
However, I just feel like it's missing something to really complete it... it's like a very good player with that one hole in his/her game that holds them back from being a perennial all-star, while those better skills themselves aren't big enough to compensate. Just not quite there. As such, they fall into this not-quite-great-but-very-good tier on the list. It's good and plenty tasty, but all the hype would make you think this is on an elite level it isn't (and it seems said hype has not sustained anyhow).
#28: The Burger Monk
2422 St. Clair Avenue West
Sometimes you happen to discover a place by virtue of it being in a familiar area: a part of town you maybe used to live in and/or maybe have a seasonal weekly obligation to visit, thus one rare night off you're messing about online with maps (as one does) and notice an under-the-radar yet pretty darn popular burger joint (with over a thousand Google reviews) that you've never even heard of before.
You gotta try it. See what happens, what all this newly discovered fuss is about. For real, this place has a 4.9 rating on there. It's maybe gone up since I got this four months ago. How? Well for starters... this isn't exactly the wealthiest corner of town and these prices are cheap. Like, this and Johnny's are perhaps the two biggest bargains on the entire list (not counting any of the major chains doing a promotion, like a five dollar Teen Burger etc).
The beefiness in the burger is indeed quite immediate with a good touch of salt to the taste. Some nice firm denseness to it also, particularly in the bun (which has a particular Asian bakery honey-glazed sweetness to it also). It's different and quite tasty (they also gave me a fortune cookie, I kid you not).
Very good stuff overall here. The beef is juicy, on the pleasantly fatty side and aside from the cheese (which is fake but not offensively so) this all tastes quite fresh and made in-house. Lots of light and simple flavours that make for quite an affordably satisfying experience.
#27: Smash Smash
2889 St. Clair Avenue East
An extremely well regarded spot with extremely limited hours (only open twenty total hours a week!) in an extremely obscure stretch of East York. You definitely get a vibe of this being a small, cozy and local operation... although they do offer some very inventive burger takes on their menu.
Of course, I have to keep things generally simple and standardized for the purpose of this list (yay) and so ordered Smash Smash's simplest option. Straight up cheese, beef, pickle... and diced onions which is actually a bit unusual among most entires on here (especially since I usually omit onions in my orders, whoops).
It's a very good burger (and it's a smash, what a shocker right): quite fatty, you can really taste beef on every bite and they get the crispy edges texture down beautifully. The sauce has a bit of sweet tang to it, also nice. I would've liked the cheese to be more of a presence though, while I also did find this burger to be a bit too much on the salty side for my tastes (I do have a bit of a dislike for overtly salty things, thus my disdain for olives or anchovies for instance).
Definitely one that I enjoyed more in the moment, then kind of lowered my overall feeling on it after the flavours had faded and its memory settled in. Still a fine burger and I'd go again for one of their more interesting creations... so I think this slot on the list feels about right.
#25: Ozzy's
66 Nassau Street
These vibes, man. Spoilers but, there will eventually (emphasis on "eventually") be a bonus article about this list coming up and Ozzy's will feature prominently in one category, so stay tuned for that.
It's also a damn fine burger, quite simple but very juicy and crumbly in that beef patty (that taste also lingers quite nicely). Pleasant grilled edges and caramelized onions help the entire package as well, plus there's a great element of sauciness. A very enjoyable, properly thick little cheeseburger. Hmmm... I can't think of anything negative to say about it... we sure this one is only #25 on the list? Too much pickle? Too vague whether the name is a Black Sabbath reference? (I mean, check out the amazing collection of music on the walls).
*various locations*
I have my quibbles. First and foremost... these burgers are so damn small! Five moderate bites, adios amigo. Also... why the heck are their paper bags so huge even when you're only ordering one of these little burgers to go? It's like using a whole garbage bag for a single tortilla chip.
Griping aside, Shake Shack is indeed real good. Not quite as good as I remember them being when I visited Madison Square in New York City many years ago (the memory of that particular burger could challenge for the crown here and now). Such things will happen when you expand so much, so rapidly and as is... this is a strong quality burger chain. Perhaps the strongest we have up here? The beef is simply excellent, so tender and flavourful with a mix of greasy and fatty taste... only disappointing in how this Toronto edition of the Shack is more great than mind-bendingly transcendent.
#23: Oklahoma Burgers
*various locations*
I think you have to really, really, really... really love grilled white onions to fully appreciate this particular burger. Can't stay I do myself (burgers are really the only time I tolerate them at all) and so most of my experience when trying Oklahoma Burgers was: "hey this is pretty good but man I'd like some burger to go with these onions"
I mean for real, this thing just oozes onions from every pore of its being. They're not only smashed into the beef patty while on the grill, but they top it with more onions! Nevertheless, it's still a fantastic burger even if overshadowed via its sharp bulby vice. The Oklahoma style of smash burgers is indeed all about those onions, and so this place being named after that very style and state... yeah they're not being subtle about it.
Definitely get the "BM" burger also, as that one has the very distinct bone marrow sauce and there's really nothing else like it on this list (or many other burgers period). Rich, creamy... semi sweet and nutty? Quite nuanced and unique stuff, that sauce.
#22: Rosies Burgers
*various locations*
Keep in mind I've only tried the original Port Credit location, it was just the one time... and this was also over a year and a half ago. Entirely possible their ambitious expansion through Toronto has diminished their quality and reputation... I simply don't know. This list is just based on what I myself experienced, nothing more. A few places I've re-tried to be totally sure (and in a few cases I'd have looked foolish and insane had I kept them in their initial spots) but I only have so much time, energy (and cash) to be as precise and up-to-date on this stuff as I can. I only claim to be somewhat omnipotent when it comes to my opinion in these reviews.
As I encountered it, Rosies was extremely good, nailing the basic components of a smash burger with considerable tasty skill. Elevated greasy taste, good crunchy edges, very flat yet beefy patty. Not re-inventing any kind of smash burger wheel (plus flat wheels aren't a thing) Rosie's is just doing its thing by executing the basics well. Great stuff.
#21.5: Mayday Burger
***
I just really liked this one a lot. Tremendous depth to the beef texture (something you find with the better smash burgers) and smothering the thing in perfectly melted fake cheese always gets a thumbs up from me. A great little unhearalded gem just off the constant blitz of lights and action at Dundas-I-mean *insert new name here* Square.
***and sadly it seems like they closed at some point between when I began working on this project and the very, very long time it took for these words to reach your eyes. Or possibly shortly before that. Damnit! I was so worried this would happen. I mean, who needs more good food options or distinctive fun bars downtown when you can just have more condos, condos, condos. If you all wonder why I prefer avoiding this central part of the city...
#21: The Burger Shack
233 Eglinton Avenue West
I'll admit to being skeptical, despite briefly living in the area long ago and remembering Burger Shack being extremely good and worth its beloved reputation. All these old school burger joints with their bread fillers in the patty... could I have also been waxing nostalgic about this one? Too young and inexperienced to recognize the obvious shortcuts in going on here?
#20: Burger Republic
1171 Dundas Street West
Another smash burger and another one that rises a notch above most of the others. I did get some French Fries on the house too, almost like they knew I'm a reviewer and hey, bribery will get you everywhere...
In all seriousness though, for a smash burger this brings a considerable amount of both beefiness and fattiness, especially the latter (you can really taste it)... but it works because the burger is real darn balanced and good. Adding to the oily feel is the brioche bun (rather than the typical potato roll for a smash) which is a nice subtle change in flavour and texture (a bit like buttery richness meets dirty grease). Just a very well put together cheeseburger (with some truffle mayo and jalapeños here adding additional zing). Tasty stuff.
#19: Ugly Delicious Toronto
199 Baldwin Street
One I came into with pretty modest expectations: they weren't really been a place I'd heard much about either good or bad, which typically means something forgettably ordinary (at best).
They were immediately in my good graces for one singular reason: curly fries! Surely the best shape and form of fry, to which I will not be accepting of any arguments at this time.
Curling my heartstrings is fine and all, but Ugly Delicious (not a top 20 name for the record) have their spot on this list for making a very impressive burger as well. Tender, juicy, heavy on the beefy aspects one wants from a burger (which can be trickier with this smash style). It doesn't have those crispy edges a lot of smashes do, forgoing that grilled greasiness for that juiciness (resulting in this being quite a sloppy burger in all the best ways).
Despite that juiciness, the beef has a very pleasant bounciness to it also. This is all very classic: saucy, cheesy, smashy smashy... combined with a mustardy/relishy burger sauce and shredded lettuce, this isn't anything new or groundbreaking but its really darn good at indeed following such a classic burger template. A pleasant surprise indeed.
#18: Holy Chuck
*various locations*
You ever see a sandwich that could take a bite outta you??? Hey, I had to make that joke at some point...
Ow! Damn sandwich took a bite outta me.
Holy Chuck has long been regarded among Toronto's very finest burgers, pretty much ever since they opened up at *insert opening date here*. I mean.... 2011.
This be one very juicy and basic burger, yet it tastes a tiny bit more refined despite all that (even the mayo and mustard is rather basic fare). That simplicity does allow the beef to be the main attraction, with the melted cheese and the bacon (a maple bacon which it has to be mentioned is outstanding, just the right touch of maple without tasting fake or sugary) playing the key supporting roles. The basic feel of the condiments seems there only to enhance that very notion of letting the stars of the show be the stars.
And indeed they shine. It's a very crumbly, juice-filled burger patty with a beef taste that expands within the mouth on each bite... almost as though they cooked it to medium yet there's no sign of pink anywhere. Quite a neat trick if so. Throw in that sensational maple bacon, a (not so) healthy coating of American cheese... and it's not difficult to see why this place has been held in such elite high regard for the past decade and a half.
I'm not quite there with it being among the best of the best, but this is an exceptionally prepared and cooked burger that's simplicity hides the genuine craft, care for quality and thought clearly involved in this thing. Real damn good.
#17: Gladiator Burger
*various locations*
A highly regarded Toronto mini-chain that very much impressed and stood out to me, despite being (you guessed it) another smash burger! Plenty of beefy-to-cheesy flavour (nice) with tremendous texture, like you can get the ground beef mouth feel yet the burger itself doesn't crumble all that much. Definitely on the fattier side (you can taste it) while their burger sauce very much resembles 1000 Island Dressing (shout out to my accompanying west end friend who pointed that out).
#16: Two Hands
695 College Street
Two hands! Two burg-erans!
I for one welcome our Burgeran overloads, may I remind you that as an influential food reviewer, I can be used to round up others and direct them down College Street... ideally to get one of their two hands on one of these burgers.
There's a good argument, at least in my head (ol' reliable) that this should actually be notably higher on the list... mostly by virtue of my-being-in-a-foul-mood when I visited Two Hands, with said mood being significantly improved once I had exited. Hey, we're all a little grouchy when we're hungry this is true... but also consider the number of times in your life you've been in that irritable type of hunger mode and yet whatever you've managed to eventually eat either does nothing to alleviate that foulness of mood, or perhaps even provokes whatever bad feelings are bubbling beneath your surface. Sometimes it isn't quite as simple as "hey you're hungry and pissy, stuff some food in that food hole then you'll be fine".
My unfounded and unsolicited dissertation on human psychology and related eating habits aside... look Two Hands is pretty darn tasty and good. A solid foundation of loose beefiness on every bite, the cheesiness is very much in the centre-stage (it coats the mouth marvellously) and there's tremendous texture and flavour balance with the meat, cheese, bun and toppings.
For a smash-style burger it also has some thick, hearty texture (despite these being a very specifically advertised "3.7" ounce beef patty). Very filling for an objectively small cheeseburger. There's also a very distinct cured meat kind of flavour/saltiness/hint that I couldn't quite pinpoint (maybe the pickle?). Regardless I thought this was absolutely excellent, to the point that the tasty burger made it easy to forget how damn sweaty it was inside this still relatively new (like too new to have the air conditioning fully installed quite yet) spot on College Street.
#15: Fearless Meat
884 Kingston Road
Maybe it's my east end bias speaking (scratch the "maybe" part) but I genuinely think Fearless Meat might deserve to be even higher. This is a big, filling burger that has so much in the way of flavour, juiciness, authentic quality (they use real slices of cheddar for instance, bless them) and a nice firm Ace Bakery-like brioche bun to (try) hold all this goodness together. And I didn't even opt to get the smoked meat addition to my cheeseburger either.
With a mild hint of peppercorn (or at least some kind of cracked pepper) in the beef, you get all the flavours you like in a large heavy burger: char, meatiness, juiciness, lingering taste on the tongue... it's simply really, really damn good. Damn good enough to make me forget about the ketchup on here, even. Straightforward, extremely satisfying, with exceptional burger beef. You can see why they're fearless.
#14: Matt's Burger Lab
*various locations*
For whatever reason in my initial (and blind) recollection I'd thought of this one as a minor disappointment. Like I'd been expecting something mind-blowing and instead walked away thinking "that was just good, I guess". Then I looked at my pictures, saw and remembered "no wait, that was indeed an extremely good one... I better check my notes again."
To the notebook! This would've been last summer (2025) and I quote: "that's a crumbly", "Beef smash burger tickle of salt and pepper real good", "American classic (tastes so cal[California])" and most importantly "The h baby...", which if anybody reading this out there could possibly interpret what I meant with that comment, well you've done better than I have.
Suffice to say, Mattholomew and his flattened meat patty laboratory make a damn nice one of those. You really get a hearty dose of said meat (as the picture demonstrates), the style of the place speaks to my inner nerd and they really do seem to keep things simple yet positively delicious. Via the photos one might fear this could be a drier type of burger but I recall quite the opposite at that.
#13: Rudy's Rude Dude
*various locations*
Full disclosure: I have not been to a Rudy in many years (probably around the time of my initial review) and so I can't quite comment on whether their quality has slipped due to expansion, or if they're just as fantastic as they ever were. The former probably drops them out of the Top 30, the latter makes them a contender for a slot in the final ten. As such, this seems the safest spot on the list for our friend Rudy here, a place I have nothing but multiple glowing experiences from but admittedly they were some time ago (like you know, a time before I started some kind of insane burger reviewing project).
#12: Aloette Go
*various locations*
Fantastic burger that gives off a sense of thinking it's a little better/fancier than it actually is, unsurprising when you consider what big brother restaurant Alo is.
The unusual (for a burger) elemental cheese they put on this thing is really what stood out to me most (extreme in its gooey decadence) as beyond that you have a very standard (though very good) smash style burger, though with less emphasis on the crispy edges as this patty has a much thicker texture than most of those. High grades for innovation and execution, solid grades for the beef itself (not all that juicy or bursting with flavour)... this is what you get. A strong showing indeed but this falls into the tier of "best of the rest".
#11: Burger Hill
2326 Danforth Avenue
My two favourite outcomes when undertaking this type of project are either: trying a famous widely reviewed spot for the first ever time and discovering first-hand what all that love is about... or stumbling upon a less-talked about place with moderate expectations, only for those to be blasted out through the roof.
For me, Burger Hill is the biggest latter one I simply did not see coming. I just happened to be in the area, had heard of them before but hadn't been all that interested in trying them, figured this could be one to fill out the list a little bit... hey it's a good thing I end up being so thorough in these mad food quests.
Definitely one of the best smelling burgers on the list... in fact the entire place had a distinct aroma of grilled meats and fried things (terrible I know). Indeed the burger itself carries the echo flavour of those many that came before it... very much a dirty tasting burger (despite it's tight presentation) with some considerable chew, but the flavour is absolutely stellar and lingers fabulously. Smashed and greasy, beefy and juicy and drippy in all the right ways. The sauce reminds one of the classic McDonald's secret sauce with its slightly sour mayo, relishy kick... my only real complaint is the iron-branded logo thing on top is pretty corny. Beyond that, just a phenomenal smash burger.
#10: Gold Standard's Telway Burger
385 Roncevalles Avenue
1574 Queen Street West
You may recall Gold Standard placing very high on my breakfast sandwiches ranking last year (an article that confused and infuriated many) and so upon discovering they were also renowned for slinging burgers... another visit was non-negotiable.
My absolute first impression (as in, those first couple bites) was something along the lines of "hey this is pretty good, there's some strong first bite magic here but its also very basic and nothing is blowing me away all that much". Plus, the thing smells more like a bakery than a burger (a wonderful assortment of sweet baked goods sure, but a bakery nonetheless).
Indeed it's that stark simplicity that defines it: all you taste is beef, bun and cheese (the pickles seem absorbed by that trifecta). The cheese blankets the beef perfectly, the beef itself is extremely hearty despite the relative small size of it (and the burger itself) while that bun brings a certain pastry sweetness to it unlike almost anything else on this list (Burger Monk is somewhat similar).
This was a burger I found myself thinking about more and more as the days and weeks created distance from that first encounter... which is typically a very good sign when we're talking food. The sheer barebones of it might be a turn-off for some, but what it does have here is truly exceptional and one could argue it simply doesn't need anything else. It's clearly here in my Top 10 so, I can't exactly pick at much here myself.
#9: Bindi's Burgers
12 Clinton Street (upstairs)
Ah, the Monarch Tavern.
This is one I think my longtime food reviewing companion adored far more than I did... and seeing how it's coming in at #9 here on a very competitive list, I certainly thought rather highly of it myself.
Without question the most unique burger on this list in regards to the supporting cast of ingredients. You've got an Oklahoma style smash (onions pounded into the thing) but with lamb mixed into the beef (giving a bit more dry and peppery chew) along with a sweet tomato chutney, a considerable presence of mint and cilantro... with a relishy sweet sauce to boot.
There's a lot going on and for me personally... probably a little too much to the point it overshadows the burger itself. Strange to say but this is a burger I think I admired far more than I enjoyed: the quality is fantastic and all the elements do work together quite nicely. They nail every little detail: soft and light toast on the bun, the smash is on point, the texture of the patty legitimately crumbles with meaty goodness... it's all flat-out terrific. Alas... maybe not my type of burger, despite those well-earned and deserved accolades and praise. Maybe I'm just somewhat boring when it comes to burgers (scratch the "maybe").
81 Bay Street (4th floor)
2162 Danforth Avenue
A fascinating dude with a memorable name (dun dun-dun dun) who makes a tremendous burger. This is one I barely remember (been a few years) beyond "this was really really really good". Well, time to cheat! Off to the Wayback Machine to see what I wrote:
This isn't a particularly greasy burger, at least not to any noticeable point, but it is an impressively juicy one. Chef Friday says he uses a blend of beef cuts to make his patties (brisket, short rib and sirloin... and in doing so has struck that lovely balance of burger. It isn't even cooked down to slightly under 'Medium' to achieve that fabulous juicy texture... heck if anything this was closer to 'Medium-Well', and this is a thicker patty than your typical smash burger even. It has to be that excellent blend of beef cuts as the masterstroke, unlocking both fantastic flavour and that decadent juiciness while being cooked so thoroughly.
The composition of the burger itself isn't atypical: you've got your lettuce, tomato, melted American cheese (a must), pickles (which were vivid and had some nice punch) and the Friday sauce. And... dried crispy onions... which is a bit more unusual. They were underneath the beef patty and it was only an occasional bite I'd notice them, but I liked them when I got them. Very nice touch.
Thanks, Past Me! Sounds like a winner.
#7: Just Another Burger Spot (JABS)
630 St. Clair Avenue West
Until this extravaganza article, my review of JABS was the most recent Tuesday Taste (and at this point naturally was so damn many burgers ago that my exact memory of JABS is vague beyond: "burger good! Yum!"
It's an unassuming spot on St. Clair West and Christie that makes a genuinely top notch smash burger. The perfect mix of soft (yet dense) fresh sweet potato bun, juicy flavourful beef, a zingy burger sauce... and a real secret weapon in their in-house made onion jam. Truly brilliant. This might even be a bit too low on the list considering how nearly flawless all this is, which is more a testament to how incredibly good the remaining entries on the list are rather than any indictment on JABS' shortcomings. It's fantastic.
#6: Happy Burger
*various locations*
Another 2026 review! A place I tried in a rather dark state of mind (ironic considering the name of this particular spot) and despite that anti-mulligan, this burger stood out to me as deservedly among Toronto's very best.
More of a fluffier bun, with a more yellow mustardy hint to the sauce... meanwhile you've got the perfect texture for a smash burger with a flavour that holds from beginning to end. Their truffle burger (which I tried on my second visit and is the second burger you see above) might be one of the most delicious things I've eaten all year.
Even just judging by their regular cheeseburger (which I am), this is still a worthy Top 10 entry. Impressive execution.
#5: Mista Boiga
191 Geary Avenue
Perhaps the best side effect of venturing all over the city to try these places is that I get to visit cool neighbourhoods I typically don't have any reason to... and Geary Avenue certainly qualifies as one of Toronto's cooler areas.
Mista Boiga is essentially what Big Trouble Pizza (which were also fantastic) has morphed into, with the former co-owner of Big Trouble Eddie Chan taking on the full reigns here (they'd also been offering burger specials there in the latter days of that business).
On first bite... whoa ho ho (my exact notes I swear). The beef has a lattice-like texture to it (an astute observation by my longtime friend and food trying companion) giving the beef a delicate yet firm and vivid taste and texture. Very distinctive. There's definitely a McDonald's influence here (the touch of ketchup and American cheese in particular) but this is far far superior to anything the Golden Arches have likely ever devised.
My word! It's a flying burger saucer!
It's even juicy too, despite its impressive thinness... just an absolutely stellar burger that deserves (and I think is) to be regarded as among Toronto's best. Geary Avenue is worth a visit for any reason regardless, but Mister Boiga is just another attraction to make such a trip more frequently. Wonderful stuff.
#4: Atomic Burger
245 Greenwood Avenue
A non-smash burger! Finally some variety here at the summit of this mountain-sized ranking. Atomic is a straightforward burger that earns this high slot via just how incredibly delicious their beef is. A thick juicy, slightly drippy dry-aged patty with such a big lingering flavour that it reminds one of a high end restaurant style burger, only instead it's coming out of this quirky little shop on Greenwood Avenue that doesn't (didn't?) even have inside seating. Good thing there's a huge gorgeous park across the street.
Absolutely one of the very, very best burgers in Toronto and a nice counterpoint to the current flood of smash-style joints everywhere that are still continuously popping up.
75 St. Nicholas Street
As I mentioned in my review, the lightly crispy deep fried jalapeños on their namesake burger are just such an inspired, brilliant addition to this burger. Adding a crunchy texture, not to mention a zing of spice, gives this burger such a unique completeness. For a long chunk of this project I thought this was going to be number one... it's only that second burger from September you see above, while absolutely delicious, that made me reconsider if this was really the gold medal winner. As much as I absolutely love that jalapeño touch.
Nothing wrong with a bronze in this case, because Cabanos is both wonderful and on one of my favourite lesser known streets in all of downtown Toronto. Incredibly memorable (check out the cheese on the bottom for instance) in all the best ways.
#2: Burger Drops
116 Atlantic Avenue
Just a dictionary definition (dictionefition?) of a really, really damn good smash-style burger. The balance and ratio of cheese, beef, pickle, sauce... it's all precise and just right on point. The type of burger that is still really tasty, flavourful and enjoyable while cold... which is also not a common thing to find.
I think a lot of people consider this to indeed be Toronto's very best burger and it's easy to see why. By good fortune I happen to work closeby in the summer and so have tried Burger Drops multiple times... and each time I've liked it more and more. The texture is near perfection: a juicy centre with just enough of that crispy greasy outside (not too much that it's dry, or too little that it's sloppy).
Worth getting off at the Exhibition GO and waiting another half hour for a train. A must try (as truly any in this Top 10 are).
255 Coxwell Avenue
505 Richmond Street
You know a cheeseburger is on an elite level when you can eat it cold an hour or so later... and it still tastes phenomenal in both flavour and texture (as to why I'm eating so many burgers cold, well that's MY business damn it...)
Harry's makes a real greasy, dirty if you will, type of smash burger... and it's so freaking good. Every bite just oozes with that grilled beef flavour, the texture is wonderfully and evenly cooked throughout (none of those crispy edges, which this does not need) while the rest of the toppings also play a nice supporting part to really make this burger more like an experience than a meal. Whereas a lot of burgers I ranked highly on the list for having such great balance, Harry's is very very beef-forward and despite that not usually being my preferred type of burger... here it's simply a tremendous, undeniably delicious thing. It's love at first bite for this worthy champion.
So there you have it! That was... a lot of burgers. I imagine I'm on some kind of cow hit-list at this point and I've never wanted to eat salads more in my entire life... nevertheless I hope you all enjoyed this beefy saga. I'm sure everyone has their own personal favourites and to be completely honest any of those ones in the Top 8 could be switched around on the right day... this is just how I saw (and tasted) em and I think I gave all the worthy ones their due respect and the unworthy ones a righteous trashing.
And hey, just for fun here at the end... here's a handy description of the tiers for this list:
68-58: AVOID! Better off taking a chance on those iffy back-of-the-fridge leftovers
57-51: Unremarkable and semi-disappointing, though with flickers of decency
50-36: More than a flicker. Flaws but you'll have a solid time
35-19: The juicy middle of good enjoyable burgers
18-9: Hell yeah
8-1: OH HELL YEAH
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Tasty Burgers
I'd also be remiss not to mention this excellent Toronto burger blog that certainly was a source of inspiration/reference for me during this project. He sadly seemed to be on an extended hiatus at the moment (I feel ya man) but he covered a lot of ground about a decade ago when it came to trying out interesting burger spots. Definitely worth a click and a glance, not to mention I wish I'd thought of that grading system first...
Tuesday Tune
The name of this band is the Talking Heads
And that's all! Yeah, I was not kidding when I said this was a big one. This is not goodbye for another extended period however... I have some smaller review ideas on the back stove (they'd have to be smaller than this behemoth) plus I'll be exploring a bunch of unfamiliar European countries later this month and so... perhaps a chronicle of that might be a thing that happens? We shall see.
Until next time, whenever that is, thanks for reading about lots and lots and lots of burgers! Stay safe, be cool, eat some burgers and most importantly of all... don't spill that mustard.
