The Top Ranked Pizza In Toronto - #55-41

The list continues! Here we move farther from quantity to quality, lets go:

#55 - Jz's Pizza - B--
232 Wellington Street West

You may have noticed, dear reader, that a lot of my skepticism towards many of these pizzas has been in regards to their price points. To which I say: damn right. If you're paying a hall of fame price for a one time fluke all-star, that's not a good deal. The better the pizza gets, the less I care about how premium the cost. Because when you get to the elite level, you get something transformative, something truly special that completely changes the game. MLB right now seems to share my skepticism without my important belief in legit talent.

Jz's Pizza isn't winning a big free agent contract, more like the Juan Pierre Award for being somewhat useful but overpriced (okay enough baseball for now). It's what I would call a Bistro Pizza: super thin crispy/crunchy crust, heavier sauce and tons of toppings at the expense of cheese. Yeah the toppings: they are bountiful here but in such uneven amounts. The salami is tasty and would make for a better pie if featured more, instead of the insane amount of roasted peppers dripping into every other flavour and bite of this thing (look at the photo. Yikes). The herb helping is likewise habitually heavy handed (that sentence needs more 'H' words, hsorry) and overall while the ingredients are of a good quality, it's all bit too much. A simpler pizza would be better? Not really, since the quality of the toppings is what makes this thing work at all. Just... less peppers please, and more specials for hungry bartenders working at local music venues.

#54 - Tosto (Bay Street) - B--
800 Bay Street

This here is an example of good ingredients and a decent concept, but it doesn't click with me. Very nicely textured sauce, strong cheese (not generic mozzarella) and flavourful soppressata. And rectangles, eh. More about them later. 

Here though, the elements are there but it falls flat because the dough... well the dough is like one of those pastries you get that looks hearty but collapses in your mouth. Thin and flavourless, it gets soggy and isn't a strong enough foundation for what's going on, like a skyscraper with a basement made of sponge. And if you go for the square shape, you gotta do something more interesting with the corners. Otherwise weirdos (like me) will just wanna eat it by hollowing it out. Good pizza elements ruined by a serious, serious flaw.
 
#53 - North Of Brooklyn (Queen West)- B--*
650 Queen Street West

Another controversial choice I'm sure. Don't care this time. I like Bitondo's, only while arguing there are better choices, but I'll never argue for this one. A long time ago I worked in a restaurant with one of the founders of NoB so I even have the personal connection, and even then I am not impressed.

So why am I, just some dude, spitting mediocrity venom on a place so many publications put in their Top Ten? First of all, a lot of people making such lists probably didn't do the ground work I did by exploring the potential hidden gems that exist beyond a social media buzz feed. This was a lot of effort and research for one person to do (I can only be so bloody humble), and lazily slotting a place in a slot I don't think they belong kinda defeats the entire purpose, don't you think? Secondly, it's good pizza but not amazing, and I think NoB gets points for being so available (late night, multiple locations) and the kind of pizza you rarely can buy only a slice of. So it's a fancier pizza made more accessible. Well done. 

Here's my real gripe though. I went there twice for this project and the first time, they had one slice available (at 5pm on a Saturday? Seriously) which was staleasfuck even heated up. Sorry, but especially when it's just bacon, kale and cheese? That's a bad look. Being fair, I went a second time and got the daily special slice with surprise anchovies(!) on it, not mentioned by the sandwich board or by the guy serving me. And that dude was such an apathetic jerk anyway I guess I'm not surprised, though it's not like people have food allergies or anything. 

I've talked a lot about the experience of going to a place. NoB deserves a higher spot on the basis of their product, but even then that's maybe good for a couple higher slots on my list, not the serious company of a legit Top Ten. Combine that with their service and down, down they go here. And good. I'll never go again, that's how bad that was.

#52 - Brass Taps Pizza Pub (Danforth)- B--
493 Danforth Avenue

A much more likeable place than #53 and that's why they're nudged ahead here. This one wins because A: I love the Danforth, B: the service was friendly (while the place was full of families during a snowstorm) and C: showing up randomly on 1/2 price pizza night will really sway a food critic.

Seriously though, this is pub pizza done pretty nice. They try to hide the flavour shortcomings with a heavy pepper seasoning, but that's unnecessary. Brass works because you can tell in the flavour, the ingredients and the texture, that they really give a shit about what they're doing. Well constructed with good cheese, good juicy sausage, the dough works surprisingly fine (the thickness did scare me) and the whole enterprise reheats to the same level of quality. It is a bit heavy and the pepper really was a bit much, so maybe share with a friend or hit them up on those half price days if atmosphere doesn't sway you as it does I.

#51 - Stratenger's - B--
1130 Queen Street East

Another summer nostalgia play: a softball team I joined last summer prefers hitting Stratengers after games, but Strats' does pub pizza quite well. Thinner crust, lightly cooked (this picture is a weird exception) without cheaping on the toppings. The most serious issue is how they cook their 'prosciutto' in the oven before serving it, transforming it into crispy ham instead of the delicious raw cured pork it should be.

Random rant time! Pub pizza is, by my definition, a tasty cheese filled pie you get while drinking pints with the boys or gals. Strats' wins points by being a thinner, budget friendlier offering: you don't have to be a pretentious snob (like me) to recognize a solid pizza done well. Pub pizza is usually overcooked and crunchy, heavy on the nacho cheese, slight on the toppings and whambam thank you mam twenty bucks please. 

Strat's also works because they kick it up a notch (Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!) with adventurous takes like a chicken tandoori pie (next summer maybe). It's not a really a 'pizza destination' (especially with a few ridiculous ones just blocks away) but it's a good spot after a victory with the baseball peoples.

#50 - Il Fornello (King West) - B-
214 King Street West

Another adventure with a certain coworker (you know who you are heh), we went during a break between a double shift because... well this location is legitimately across the street from where we work. You can see it through our giant windows!

I wish in retrospect though we'd gone to a stronger place, because he can be somewhat skeptical and I'd be curious to hear his opinion on a legitimately exceptional pie. Regardless he was right on the pitch with this one: Fornello has good toppings but this crust, man! It's super oily, coating your fingers and yet flimsy, like an overdone spinach pie from Taste of the Danforth. It just overwhelms the rest of the flavour. Every bite has that greasiness, messing up the quality surrounding it. This is a good pizza, short on cheese but their side tomato sauce was very good, smoothly hearty and rather unsweet. The crust messes it up.

#49 - PiCo (Adelaide) - B-
170 University Avenue

Another spot specializing in a quick fire, customize your sauce/toppings bonanza, PiCo has opened multiple locations all throughout downtown Toronto (many within just a few blocks of each other). It is also the closest to a Neapolitan style of those choose-your-own-adventures, with a pillowy crust and genuinely sweet San Marzano tomato sauce available. 

Where it works best, like those other spots, is the speed they make this pie happen. Get one to go, and you're gone in five minutes. Get dine-in, you're probably still out in under half an hour. Where it doesn't work, maybe a personal taste, is the crust. It gives the pie an off flavour, like chewy cookies baked with too much flour (and a hint too charred). Also a fair warning: even though for a flat rate you can have as many toppings as you like, with this kind of pizza I (like many reputable pizza joints will do) suggest you cap that around three or four. With a thin dough base in the middle, anything more is going to make it a droopy, soupy mess. Even the three I got in the photo above was pushing it.

Overall, I'd say this is a good, not great pizza option. It's quicker, cheaper (though smaller) than most dine-in restos, and their toppings are for the most part quite tasty. Definitely go for the roasted garlic. 

#48 - Fresca Pizza and Pasta - B-
302 College Street

Goddamn the grease. But man, if you're downtown, drunk, hungry and looking for a great affordable slice... Fresca checks all your boxes. It's super cheap (under four bucks), close to Kensington Market (you hipster) and right at the counter they have a garlic oil sitting there for your dirty, dirty pizza fantasies. The pizza itself is crispy, lacking a specific strength (beyond that garlic garlic) but notably lacking a specific weakness besides the occasional dough bubble.

Think of it this way: you've been drinking all night and you're wandering the streets desperate for a quick bite. This here is how so many wretched Pizza Pizzas stay in business: hungry folks wandering around hoping for a good, big slice. Pizza Pizza will sour that ambition and fill you with regret, Fresca will enhance the evening: a low sauce crispy friend with enough cheese to be a presence, complimented by that oily garlic garlic option. It's greasy, hell yeah, like oozing through your paper plate and onto the counter greasy, but it'll hit the spots it's supposed to hit.

#47 - Danforth Pizza House - B-
920 Danforth Avenue

One great thing you consistently find with some old school pizza joints is a familial atmosphere: the people eating around you have probably been going there for decades and are on a first name basis with the owner. Danforth Pizza House definitely wins points for that, even despite surviving a close down and renovation, and the service is likewise familial and fantastic.

The pizza itself? Good, though on the bland side. The sauce is fairly generic, the crust/dough a standard offering and the cheese (while in that sweet spot of plentiful) doesn't jump out at you. It's tasty but empty on any exceptional aspect to discuss: competent but unremarkable in any specific way. Its most unique aspect might be that it tastes better when reheated, adding a much needed crispiness element. At a premium price as well (around twenty bucks) I wouldn't put them on my list of 'must try' pizza destinations, but if I lived around the corner I bet I'd be a regular. The kind that probably invents some crazy custom combination that always receives both laughs and respect, heh heh. 


#46 - Slate Restaurant and Bar - B-
2237 Queen Street East

A new addition to the finicky Beaches restaurant scene (we got places for lease for centuries), Slate wins hilarity points for using an unneccessarily huge take-out box. Seriously, the pizza is like half the size of the box, you could probably fit a second pie in there and it wouldn't be crammed.

The pizza itself is very cheesy and sweet, with strong quality toppings and that nice crisp shortness you get with thinner crusts, yet with an soft overall texture as a nice touch. I would've liked a lot more sauce, and this particular pie advertised brisket which was very good but not much of a presence (those stringy things you see in the photo). It's a welcome addition to my part of town but I probably won't go for the pizza again, the price (twenty-ish bucks) being rich for what you get. 


#45 - Vesuvio's Pizzeria and Spaghetti House - B-
3010 Dundas Street West

Sorry to T, the rest of the Dodgers and my other west end friends ha. 

Vesuvio's is another old school, longtime west end pizza institution. It's a classic spot and they do what they do damn well. Really nice toppings (the bacon here explodes in your mouth), good hearty sauce and it is filling. The kind of pizza my appetite would've loved in my 20s (I've slowed down since then. It's a tragedy). You get the perfect amount of cheese, enough herby sauce that you notice it and every bite has something interesting going on. 

There are some weaknesses, like you've got to eat it quick otherwise when it gets cold all those good flavours get doughy and neutralized (luckily it reheats very well). The crust isn't too remarkable, begging for a dipping sauce, and price-wise this ain't no bargain. Still, with so many newer spots in the city just going for wood-fired, I do recommend trying Vesuvio's to change up that dynamic. There's more than one way to do this pizza thing and they've been doing it well for a long time.


#44 - Blaze Pizza (Richmond) - B-
150 John Street

I'm as surprised as you are, dear reader. I've tried Blaze three times now, expecting it not to be this good but there's something about it that just works. It's too thin, yeah, and not very filling, but it's also fairly cheap and has a lot of things going right for it. The sauce is good, the crispiness factor is off the charts, they do garlic as a topping very well (always a plus in my book), and there is an overall quality that cannot be denied. Of the 'rapid fire' pizza spots that have popped up the past while, Blaze wins the crown.

As far as negatives, again it's closer to a snack than a meal. Also I've found the service can be annoyingly eager, like aggressively so (is this enough of that? How's it looking so far? I get it, relax). There was one occasion the fellow felt the need to overly explain how they put the arugula on the pizza after it comes out of the oven (yeah duh). I get that this is a big franchise so there are those corporate expectations of particular service standards in play blah blah blah, it's just grating when... well you know your pizza. Another time though I had just bought my acoustic bass from Steve's Music and the cashier and I had a great chat about guitars, so that definitely was a more enjoyable, real experience.

#43 - Pizza Shab (Ryerson) - B
113 Bond Street

Bring on the uniqueness points. Shab is a halal pizza with locations in North York and Ryerson, which is the one I happened upon here. I wanted something without onions (which almost every pie on their menu seemed to have), so I elected upon a mushrooms, cheese, white sauce and corn(!) combination. On first smell, I thought I'd made a huge mistake: the scent was so sickeningly rich I wasn't confident my empty stomach could handle it. 

Fortunately, the richness in the flavour was more subdued. There's a high greasiness factor, reminding me a lot of a pan Pizza Hut, and likewise with that thick cheese and dough bite you get there. Unlike Hut though, the oiliness was thankfully not overwhelming (like oozing through the box) and it reheated in the oven almost perfectly (just the crust missed that boat, coming in soft and stale instead of crispy like when fresh). The mushrooms were nicely sauteed and believe it or not, the corn actually worked. It's like a rich, pizza cake, and tastes a lot better than that probably sounds. I'd definitely try it again, with different ingredients next time of course.

Also, as you may have noticed from the photo, they gave me packets of ketchup with the pizza, an accompaniment so unusual and bizarre I couldn't help but take delight in it. And no, I did not use them on the pizza. Please.

#42 - Trecce - B
1792 Danforth Avenue

One of the very last places I tried for this list, Trecce is a spot near Danforth and Coxwell I'd never even heard of until I was on the Blue Night bus going home eastward and I spotted them as I passed by. 

They advertise having wood-fired pizzas and indeed they are ready about as quick as one of those often are, but this offering is not what you would expect from that. Instead of that classic, soft doughy charred crust, Trecce gives you a bit of gritty crunch, a good example of a cornmeal base used lightly. The tomato sauce is fantastic: soupy but not sloppy and a vivid sweet finish. The cheese likewise comes with strong flavour, adding a pleasant creamy element and the light drizzle of olive oil on the pizza afterwards is a nice finishing touch. Only the sausage was disappointing, not that it was indecent just that it reminds of those President's Choice sausages you find at the grocery store: fine but lacking the overall quality of the other ingredients. Overall a nice pie, though maybe unexciting if you're not either a big fan of Mediterranean food or a pizza obsessive maniac like... uh....um....

#41 - Superpoint (Ossington) - B
184 Ossington Avenue

I really wish I'd been able to try the Express location in Parkdale or this one at just a different time, just to see what different offerings might be featured. Nevertheless this was when this humble pizza writer was able to go and I went for a classic pepperoni.

This is the kind of pizza I'd probably rave about as a teenager, because it just makes me think of going to those long gone arcades on Yonge Street and spending my few remaining coins on the closest slice I could find. In that regard, Superpoint is that perfect arcade slice I always dreamed of.

But now, I'm a bitter old pizza cynic! Ha not really, I'm in my early thirties and have tried so many other pies that it just takes more to impress me. This is a finely done slice: loaded with good, tiny pepps; greasy (yet not overly oily) cheese with solid crust crisp and some good seasoning. I'd argue the biggest flaw was that there was too much seasoning, overwhelming the rest of the flavours in play. I do think as I've gotten older my tolerance for salty things has dropped dramatically. I usually avoid pepperoni now, seriously! (Better discount this article completely now, right? But you won't, you've already read this far, fool ha ha ha! Seriously though keep reading). Anyhow it's likely if another more appealing slice had been available they might have scored higher, but it's all good. I like what they're doing.



This is where the list gets real tough, of course. Next time, we break into the Top 40! This will be my Billboard (Pizzaboard?)
 

   
 








 

The Top Ranked Pizza In Toronto - #75-56

Here we go! Setting out to rate, review and rank all of the very best pizzas in Toronto was a tremendous undertaking, requiring substantial time, effort, willingness to travel and most importantly, an unshakable perpetual love of pizza.

And it was impossible.

At least, impossible in a completionism way of approaching it. There are hundreds of places all over this city that serve pizza in some capacity. And sure, trying every single one and comparing them all against each other in a cheesy, saucey battle royale would logically be the most effective way to properly measure them. That would make trying pizza a full-time job (and hey, I'd gladly do it for the right price) and as it stands now I don't have the energy, the finances or availability to accept this challenge at its most ultimate level. Also for every unknown diamond in the rough you're going to find about three spots that are as bad as they look. Trust me I know.

So to settle on 75 places, and this particular 75 at that? Well it was going to be only 30 (ha ha hah! Those were the days) and once I reached that number I'd be good. Clearly something went wrong, very wrong. More and more interesting places popped up and I had to stop this madness at some arbitrary point, otherwise I'd be in pizza testing anarchy forever. Continuing this project in perpetuity defeats its own purpose, I would say.

I'm certain there's a spot somewhere I didn't get to or never heard of that would crack my top 25. Fine, whatever. What I did was research popular consensus, through social media or various publications, on which places were consistently mentioned among the best or most well known in the city. By this method I'm confident I've compiled a comprehensive list of those famed spots mixed in with others a bit more obscure (with two notable absences, which were inexplicably closed when I visited). This isn't a "best of" list, it's a "best of the best". Decided by me. Damn right.

Finally, since this is about the best pizza in Toronto, I must note that I mean the city of Toronto proper and not the GTA. This means Scarborough and Etobicoke good! Brampton or Markham or Scugog (honestly never even heard of you guys, sorry) not within my range. I'm sure there's some good pizza in those places but I don't drive and it takes me two hours on the TTC just to get to Jane station sometimes.

Anyhow, enough preample ramble. Here's the good stuff!



#75 - Scaddabush (Front Street) -- C-
200 Front Street West
 

When you make a deep list like this one, somebody has to claim that dank bottom. And remember there are hundreds of pizzas in this city, so number 75 here is hardly among the worst in all of T.O.

But this is one certainly closer to the worst than it is to the very best. 

Trying this offering, my first thought was how it reminded me of a frozen pizza trying so hard to be a real boy. A nothing crust offering only crunch over anything resembling flavour; generic Pizza Sauce(TM) with a watered down tomato consistency and a non-existent cheese factor (couldn't even taste it); the toppings (pepperoni, bacon, roasted garlic) decent though lacklustre: the garlic noticeably under-roasted and lacking oil, while this painfully salty pepperoni/bacon was the thing that put the frozen pizza idea in my head. The dominating flavour of it all indeed was salt, mixed with their "Scaddabush Spice" which tasted like (more!) seasoning salt mixed with pepper. Great.

I can tolerate an aggressively mediocre pie sure, if the price fits. I'll eat a frozen pizza from time to time for a couple bucks and this one would qualify as a better one. Unfortunately, this is a twenty dollar pizza. Twenty bucks! With a size that barely matches two slices from most establishments no less. Combine that with ingredients suggesting No Frills flyer day, and that's really it.  Maybe their other food options are more robust, maybe, but as pizza goes I would never seek this one out and I'll never eat it again. It's better than Pizza Pizza but at least there you expect severe disappointment.


#74 - Cora Pizza -- C
656A Spadina Avenue

Are pizza rivalries a thing in Toronto? Why not? As a once UofT student, the first pizza rivalry that popped into my head was: "which is the best of the three revered late-night Harbord slices?"

Cora comes in as the weakest of those three. But not by much, and really the worst experience was beforehand, biking there after work in a flooding rainstorm (I'm really good at picking terrible days to travel to these places, which will become as obvious as this article obsesses with counting down numbers). The pizza itself gives you a 'this exists' ratio of cheese to topping, not much sauce and a forgettable crust. Pizzaville like, with a bit more crisp, less replacement level cheese. Still better than Pizza Pizza.


#73 - The Fill Station -- C
2282 Queen Street East
 

I sought Fill Station's pizza offering for one primary reason: they're easily the closest one to my house. Seriously, Google Maps has them about 220 metres from my front door. 

That considerable convenience doesn't compensate for the fact that this pizza isn't very impressive, though. Brings on healthy amounts of sauce and toppings (pulled pork here) sure, but doesn't bring much overall flavour. It has a soft spongey texture, especially crust-wise, which tastes strongly of flour and little else. To be quite honest it might not have even made the list at all had it not tasted considerably better the next day after reheating (making it much crispier, solving some of those texture problems). Again, it's a place known for cheap beer, big TVs and the occasional police car outside, not killer bar pizza. People don't go there for only that and I don't recommend they do. 


#72 - Queen City Pizza -- C
1056 Queen Street East

Taking the place of the grimey Amato's at Queen and Pape is a definite improvement, but the result is...  not. There's a nice doughy texture (good!), the pepperoni is tasty, not overly salty (good!) and the sauce has a punch of garlic powder to it (decent!). However, despite the suggested thickness of my picture, the cheese is thinly layered and a complete non factor (not good), noticeably overdone in the oven (very not good) and the crust is a thin shell with absolutely nothing going on (also very not good). 

Bonus Time! Two crucial ways I grade a pizza (assuming I don't eat the entire thing first). First is the Cold Test: how good is it cold? The stronger pizzas retain almost all their deliciousness if eaten cold (like sitting around for 1/2 an hour cold, not straight-outta-the-fridge cold). The flavour is still there, just not vividly since it's not melty and saucey in your mouth. 

The other is the ReHeat Test: how much of its initial 'fresh from the oven magic' does it rediscover when reheated at home? (Talking oven/stove pan here, not microwave because C'mon). Queen City sadly doesn't pass either of those tests, because of that overcooked cheese. Still though, it's nice to have a decent slice option on Queen East and I will give them meaningless unique points for cutting their slices into three.  

#71 - Pizza Gigi -- C  
189 Harbord Street
  

A bit of a legendary spot in Toronto folklore for reportedly selling a bit more than just pizza, Pizza Gigi falls right in the middle of the three Harbord options. It's not really better than Cora, just more well rounded. A better crispiness, the tomato sauce is more of a presence (though still lacking) and this particular slice utilized feta cheese generously. Nothing to blow you away, but decent. Also one of those places where the experience of being there is arguably better than the pizza itself, as the entire time I was there (on that same dumb rainy Sunday) multiple regulars came to the counter and struck up long conversations with the owner. Always a nice touch.

And yeah, because of the history surrounding this place, I feel the need to point out that the green stuff there is spinach! As much as something else would make the slice tastier... (I had to get one in you know).


#70 - Calibreze Pizza -- C
3019 Lakeshore Blvd West
 

Not a place I had planned to visit, as my adventure to Mimico for pizza had three other destinations in mind (one which was closed that day, grumble grumble). But when in Rome...ico...

You can't really go wrong with a Hawaiian slice (I'm pro pineapple, obviously. Fget the haters) and Calibreze (Calabrese? Hilariously their sign out front is different than their website) executes one with complete competence. They get a boost over Cora despite strong similarity thanks to some light pepper on the slice, a more present tomato sauce factor and way more pineapple (bite me, haters). Everything else is unremarkable. It's average pizza done with competence. There's nothing wrong with that, just nothing special.

As a brief aside, I'd like to share something I've noticed with most mediocre pizzas: that thick, bland and air bubbled crust. Pizza Pizza has mastered this technique of giving no craps about crusts for a long time, it's why they sell cocaine disguised as garlic dipping sauce (please forgive me, PzPz garlic sauce! I still love you!) But in all seriousness, so many places, even ones high on this list, treat the crust as an after-thought. That's why it's such a treat when you get a place that does it right, either with the right level of seasoning, cooking prowess or other little tricks. 

Anyway now back to the program. 

#69 - Bravo Pizza -- C+
901 Millwood Road
 

Places like Bravo are what helped make this entire thing so fun (that and, you know, eating a lot of pizza). Nestled away in a small plaza in Leaside, Bravo has been around apparently since the 60's. I'll confess I never heard of them until  a random bike ride up into North York, with Bravo happening to be right on the way.

As a pizza, it's similar to many of the "C" levels on this list: unremarkable average pizza made competently. What gives them that slight '+' bump is that there's actually a decent amount of sauce on this fella, and you can tell it's not some Generic-Co Brand of sauce either. They don't win points for using bacon crumble instead of bacon strips (a definite no-no compared to elite level pizza) but everything else is fine and the prices are reasonable (plus it's 'that' place where a small is really like a medium, also nice). Not a hidden gem, but a solid old school spot that stands out in a neighbourhood rapidly transforming.


#68 - Papa Ceo -- C+
651 Spadina Avenue
 

Ladies and gentlemen.... the winner of the Harbord Pizza Challenge! Your prize is.... a bunch of drunken teenagers! Hey baby.... yeah!!!!

Papa Ceo wins the Harbord crown for three reasons. First: the best toppings and creative options of the three. This meat lovers slice, while nothing special, was nicely loaded and I was pleased to discover the sausage juicy and the pepperoni not overly salty. Second: a crust a notch above the others. Better consistency, a crisp yet softness here compared to some of the weaker options on the list. It's not a runaway win, as of the three Papa Ceo probably has the most nonexistent sauce factor, but the rest is enough for a photo finish.

The third reason of course, is memories! Back in my U of T heyday of hanging out in the Annex with my bar friends a lot, Papa Ceo was always a go to option when it was 3:16 in the morning and our beer filled stomachs were desperate. Going back to after all those years brought some nice nostalgia: from the toothpaste food court tables and chairs, to the TV in the back showing European football way early in the morning. This place probably hasn't ever changed and why would it.


#67 - Birky's Bar -- C+
1592 Queen Street West
 

A weird one. My first attempt to try Birky's was tightly between a double shift, and I rode my bike all the way into Parkdale just to discover them inexplicably closed. At 5:30 on a Saturday. Since it looked like it was waiting for a 'For Lease' sign, I crossed them off my list and tried Amico's instead.  
Fast forward a few weeks: I'm back in Parkdale with some minutes to kill before meeting a friend. I walk a while and see that Birky's is indeed open, patrons inside and everything. So, what the hell.

Birky's Bar will definitely be the cheapest pizza on this list, because it was free! Okay.... complimentary with purchase of a pint (a daily special) so I grabbed a Amsterdam Nut Brown and settled in. It's a dark, tavern-like place (the dank, Moe! The dank!), but welcoming to strange pizza tasting outsiders none the less.

The pizza itself is... fine. Standard tomato sauce (though more plentiful than many on this list), a good amount of cheese unevenly dispersed. A very gooey enterprise. Those aspects of it reminded me a lot of those frozen mini pizzas in the grocery store, when it comes out all oozing everywhere. That alone would make this tasty but much lower on the list, if not for the crust. It's the very soft, sourdough like crust sells it for me: slightly sour, thick texture complimenting every bite. Like I said, a weird one. Gotta love the dank.


#66 - Buddha Pie -- C+
514 Annette Street
 

The first serious disappointment on the list. Scaddabush was an angry let down because of inflated price and crappy saltiness. This is not that.

No, I was very excited to try Buddha Pie. A reasonable chance to break into my top 20 was in play. Instead, here's a Pillsbury pizza pop without a top.

Before I dive into what went wrong though, the experience of walking inside Buddha Pie is like walking into somebody's public hippie living room: bookshelves, posters on the wall (obviously topless 70s films) and a worn out couch begging for crashers. Like an art house meets a library, with a pizza kitchen in the back. I've never been anywhere like this before. Rating places on atmosphere alone, Buddha has an excellent chance of winning that.

Unfortunately I must grade the entire picture, and the pizza itself is kinda funky. A soft, rubbery crust (like chewing on blubber) tasting undercooked, yet the bacon on top was far overcooked to almost burnt level and tasted only like "crispiness". The sauce was okay, the cheese works to keep it all together and the mushrooms are nice but barely noticeable. Overall just not... great. Just odd.

I'm willing to give them another chance, though. Only because the atmosphere was so welcoming and bizarre. Maybe it was an off day or something. Maybe they truly are the gem of Annette I always figured they were. Maybe... but now they sit down here on the list.

#65 - Casa Di Giorgio -- C+
1646 Queen Street East
 

Another east end spot, Casa Di Giorgio is a charmingly tiny resto on Queen East near Coxwell, right in the outskirts of the Beaches. At first I wasn't interested in trying them again: I'd tried them in the summer and was underwhelmed (although since that was during a week in which I had no electricity at home, a visit from aliens may very well have underwhelmed me). 

On this second taste, the pizza was exactly like before: cheese either very gooey or with burnt pockets, decent toppings, flavourful sauce (when it can actually break through the cheese enough to be a presence) and an entirely forgettable crust. Better than the sum of its parts though, and they do have one thing I like very, very much: cheap walk-in specials! It's entirely fine pizza best shared with a friend or three in the gigantic nearby Woodbine Park. 


#64 - Regino's (Danforth) -- C+
3331 Danforth Avenue
 

Last summer I put myself in a free agent pool in the Beaches Softball League and caught on with a team very quickly. So quickly in fact I forgot to take my free agency ad off the website, leading to several more offers throughout the summer to join other teams (it's nice to be wanted). Eventually I joined a second team on a part-time basis, and one night between a doubleheader we did a pit stop at a teammate's house near Dentonia Park. Like a champion host he ordered us a bunch of pizzas from Regino's and we were all quite pleased.

Fast forward a few months, when I embarked upon this odyssey and recalled this funtime summertime occasion. I put them on my list (so beautifully small in those days) and got excited.

Well... I will say Regino's is a damn fine pizza when A: you're with similarly hungry ballplayers, B: it's fresh, C: did I mention hungry yet? In terms of general quality though, it struggles with those same problems so damn many places at this point of the list do. Those first few bites are a heaven of doughy, cheesey, tasty topping happiness. But it drops downhill after that cooling point and doesn't recover. This crust has that same problem I talked about earlier, with a 7:1 cheese-dough/sauce ratio, and the toppings are good but ultimately standard fare. The problem with pizzas like this isn't that they're bad, because they're not, it's because they're empty. There's too much of one thing (usually doughiness) at the expense of the entire deal. When you reheat it or eat it cold, that one thing will dominate the entire flavour.

Regino's is a perfectly solid pizza option, all that said. They do garlic as a topping well (a definite plus in my book) and have some killer walk-in specials. You get what you pay for and I wouldn't say no to chipping in for one again.  

#63 - The Green Dragon Pub -- C+
1032 Kingston Road
 

Much like Fill Station lower on this list, The Green Dragon is a sports pub in the (Upper) Beaches not known as a pizza destination (a chicken wing destination though, yes). Also yes, of all the entries on the list Green Dragon is the third closest to my house (about 1.1 km). So if you think I've rounded out my list with places in my neighbourhood that happen to have pizza... you'd be right. Big deal. If you don't like it make your own list! I'd read that. Seriously I would.

Green Dragon has only started offering pizza very recently (I happened to walk by in December and noticed it advertised on their window) and they're on the right track. Using real bacon strips, cooked in that sweet perfect middle ground between rubbery and burnt, is a good start. Nicely thin, not overly salty pepperoni also. The sauce is decent, on the higher end of generic (not an insult, not a compliment) and unsurprisingly they load the cheese on real heavy. You know that cheese you get when you order nachos in a bar? Like a cheddar/monterey jack blend? That's what you get here. Which is fine, I guess. Pick your battles sometimes.

The crust has that crunchy, crumbly attribute you get with a lot of frozen pizzas, but a slight buttery hint there chases away that dreaded fear. Like I said, on the right track but with some work to do (dispersing all the cheese/toppings from the abyss/centre would be something to change). Also, it's better and more affordable (10-14 bucks) than many worse pizzas on this list. 

#62 - Olympic 76 Pizza Cafe -- C++
8 Gloucester Street
 

Pardoning my mugshot of a pizza on the run here, Olympic 76 is a spot in my old neighbourhood I've heard about for a long, long time. Yet, I'd never tried it until a couple months ago, only for the very purpose of this article.

It's a tricky one to judge. For one, it's way too expensive for what you're getting. This was a two topping small that cost just under twenty bucks. And it's not as though it's bursting with toppings either. Second, it looks and tastes a lot like Pizza Nova. That's no insult in these parts, rather an observation upon similar styles.

Running with that comparison, Olympic wins on cheese, topping quality and crust. This is a nice soft pizza, slightly greasy with a good balance of sauce/cheese/dough combining into a tasty thick bite. It doesn't reheat well though (a point against it, as I've harped on a lot with others) and seriously, at that price the toppings have to be more of a presence.

Thinking it through, I think a few factors influenced why those folks in my old neighbourhood thought so highly of it (as in, they'd describe Olympic as the best pizza in the entire city). First of all, this was back in the mid-late 2000s. Before Pizzeria Libretto helped jumpstart the Neapolitan pizza craze in Toronto*, most of what was around was either your local old school spot on the corner, or the big chains like Pizza Pizza (gawdddd no) and 2-4-1 (please gawd no). There are exceptions, many spots higher on this list have been around much longer than ten years sure. Here's the thing, those places are more neighbourhood specific, known mostly to folks who live in those neighbourhoods. Yonge and Bloor in the 2000s, we didn't have any independent pizza place like that (lots of shawarma though) except Olympic 76.

So I can see why Olympic gathers such high regard, especially compared to cookie cutter chain options. Compare that corporate-one-size attitude to the old timey atmosphere of Olympic 76, with checkered table cloth and aged wooden chairs suggesting something positively throwback and untouched by chain store dynamics. The biggest two problems are that it's expensive, and that pizza options in this city have so dramatically improved, it;s left Olympic somewhat behind in that regard as a top notch option. Try it yourself sometime though, I insist. Spots like this (particularly with the gutting of Yonge street now) don't last forever. 


*yeah yeah yeah, I know Terroni and others existed well before that. I'm arguing Libretto used an excellent business model and savvy promotion to make themselves into such a destination and most importantly a brand, and others followed that lead.


#61 - Sicily Pizza -- C++
2438 St. Clair Avenue West
  

I mentioned with Bravo how places like that are what made this adventure so fun. Places like Sicily are why I wanted to do it in the first place.

Sicily is the kind of place you could easily pass by a hundred times and completely miss it. Tucked in the corner of a plaza, beside a gas station near Runnymede and St. Clair, the only clue anything is even there is an unflashy board on the fence of a parking lot, advertising their insanely cheap walk-in specials. It's a spot you only know if you're a pizza hungry, likely non driving resident of the immediate area. Which in 2011, basically described myself and a bunch of junior/high school students. 

It's a place I have a personal connection with (my closest pizza joint when I first moved out of home? Damn right) and you might think that would tarnish my judgement a little bit. It did, as going in again after many years I actually thought it was going to be worse than I remembered, and in fact had mentally reserved a spot lower on the list for them (though my kind words of nostalgia would have remained).

Instead, here's a pizza that is always shockingly good, especially when you get past those scary low prices. There's something with really cheap pizza that makes you anticipate disaster (and rightfully so), but Sicily works because their dough and crust are at a high level. The cheese and toppings, meh. But the dough is soft, chewy and tender, pleasant with each bite and doesn't run stale even after going cold or reheated (like so many others do). And it's so damn cheap. Few other spots give you this kind of bang for your buck.


#60 - Bitondo's Pizzeria -- C++
11 Clinton Street
  

Yeah, this one's gonna hurt me. I know. Probably the most legendary old school pizza in all of downtown Toronto, well known to anybody who has either lived near College or frequented any of the many bars in that area late at night. A recent coworker of mine even told me this was her very favourite pizza in all of Toronto, and I'm sure she is not remotely alone. So bring it on, disagree with me here. They're not even in my top 50! 

Here's the thing though, I do like Bitondo's a lot. I've described certain places as having an atmosphere that adds so much to the experience of getting a pizza there, and Bitondo's is near the top of that list. Much like Olympic 76 and Sicily, Bitondo's is like entering a place completely immune to the passage of time and aggressively so. When I recently went (for this article of course) I couldn't help but chuckle as the older cashier casually argued with the even older delivery driver, the kind of argument married couples have had for centuries and will continue indefinitely until the end of our universe. The place just screams character at you, from the old diner-like menu above, the retro tables and fridges and arcade machine table (I think) crammed into the little place. It is a legend for a reason, and long may it be so.

Yeah, but the pizza. It's good! It is good and flawless... but there isn't anything more to it. Bitondo's will give you that pristine old school slice at an almost old school price (four bucks here is better than the standard five now) and it is so wonderfully huge and reheats perfectly in an oven. What I'm saying is here's a good pizza in every way: solid cheese/sauce ratio, surprisingly versatile dough and crust for a thicker offering. Like I said, no flaws. There are pizzas beyond this point that have more glaring weaknesses, but also take a higher spot because they have something great about them. Bitondo's is good pizza, with unforgettable atmosphere. A winner and a Toronto institution. On this tough list though, it needs more than just good. 



#59 - Za Pizza Bistro (Adelaide) -- C++
288 Adelaide Street West
  

Za is the first major entry on the list that advertises itself as one of those "make your own pizza" kind of places. By this they mean a custom quickly cooked pizza (because beyond Terroni, most places will at least let you substitute ingredients and make it your own) and you can even watch them do it and suggest how much of a certain thing you want on it. Clever idea really, if done right.

My experience trying Za is really a hilarious one. I had finished work downtown and one of my coworkers, aware of my insane pizza quest, suggested we check out a spot together. It was a miserably cold, windy and snowy Toronto evening, making the four block trek feel longer than that slow shift had been. My associate is more of a purist and went for something closer to a Margherita (I think) while I went for a duo of sausage and garlic. I was fairly impressed: a good amount of cheese to sauce, good slices of pre-cooked sausage that weren't too greasy, complimentary dips and a reasonable price (14 bucks-ish). 

The major flaw of the pizza, and one flaw that will pop up again a few more times, is that cornmeal base. Cornmeal is a way some pizza chefs will use to maintain consistency with the raw dough as it cooks in the oven, so that it doesn't stick on the inside. This might just be me, but I can't stand it. If it is too prominent, it gives the pizza this constant grating crunch in your mouth, like a bunch of tiny sand pebbles floating around while you're trying to chew. I don't even like bread that has grains in it, I'll chew on that stuff for twenty minutes in severe discomfort waiting for a chance to spit it out. So it's probably me with this cornmeal stuff, sure. This is my list though and to me that's a big weakness of Za.

Before we leave though, I'd be a damn writing fool if I didn't mention the climatic punchline of my Za adventure. While my coworker and I were waiting for our pizzas to be ready, another of our coworkers, who is a fair bit older than us, happened to be walking by in the freezestorm when he saw us inside and came in to join us. Za (like similar places that do this customizatron) offers a flat price for as many toppings as you want, which is what our friend did here. When he sat with us, pizza in hand, he brought a creation with tomato sauce, mozzarella, roasted garlic, pineapple, olives, roasted red peppers, onions and ham. I didn't try it despite his generousity (onions and I are enemies) but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious. Damn was I curious how that one worked out. 


#58 - Amico's Pizza -- C++
1648 Queen Street West
  

This one might piss off some of my Parkdale friends, but I'm an eastender now and I've already rated several spots near my house lower than this one, so don't dispute my meanness as unfairness. 

Amico's and I go back. When I worked at the Drake back in the late 2000s (memories!) sometimes we would be working real late nights, like 5pm to 5:30am kind of stuff. Occasionally on the real crazy ones, management would buy a bunch of pizzas for the staff around 4am or so, whenever we actually had enough time to take a break and take a bite. Thing is, those days in Parkdale (or West Queen West or whateverthefuk) the only pizza spot open that late and that would deliver, was Amico's. So they always have a spot in my younger self's hungry, hungry heart.

After nearly a decade I went back, during that inbetween shifts thing I mentioned during my Birky's review. It's classic Parkdale, simultaneously looking like a bar, an old school Italian restaurant (checkered tablecloths) a dive and yet also a family friendly, bring your grandmother with the little ones kind of spot. The best thing is that it doesn't try to be any of those specific things, it just is. To channel my inner Holden Caulfield, so many places want you to think they're something and try so hard to make you think it. Amico's ain't that.

The pizza...? Some things work. The prices (two topping small for over twenty) does not work, but those said toppings do. Bacon on pizza is a good test for me and crumble (bad) usually suggests a spot's overall quality. So finely cooked bacon, and well sauteed mushrooms was a pleasant occurrence for this pizza writer, as was the plentiful amount of said toppings. Expensive sure, but they don't short you that's for sure.

The biggest flaws are the price (they have cheap specials certain nights so... there's that) and mostly the dough. Mushrooms can be fluid sure, especially in this quantity, but the middle of the pizza became soggy right as I jumped into my second slice. Considering the thickness of the crust, the consistency of the fundamental base of the pizza wasn't... um... consistent. Too weak in the centre. Don't think I'll go back, frankly, but it's far for me. Won't say no to one though.

#57 - Pizza Nova (Beaches) -- C++ 
1928 Queen Street East (among many locations)

 
If I were a man less than 100 percent confident in my opinions and my writings thereof, I'd feel an unstoppable pressing against my very soul to explain this, and ranked so far ahead of legends and neighbourhood locales strongly loved and defended by loyal patrons, especially when slighted in the face of a corporate presence. If I were such a man.

Anyway, lemme explain please please please please please please.

In complete seriousness though, this call I feel the need to justify, but is easily justifiable. I already wrote about Nova a few months ago and praised them, now here we are within my top 60 and here's Nova. To be totally honest though, Nova would be on just the outside of the top 75 looking in if not for one thing:

The garlic pizza.

Seriously. Nova has the best garlic of any pizza outside the top 20. You get a medium walk-in special for ten bucks, get garlic instead of pepperoni (they'll gladly do it, garlic is waaaay cheaper than pepperoni) and go to town. It's plentiful: dime sized chunks spread all over while nicely oily and roasted, adding another texture and amazing smell to an otherwise decent but unremarkable pie. Nova has a decent crust (needs dip though), very good sauce with chunks of stewed tomatoes here and there (needs to be more of it!) but very, very lackluster cheese. It's like a coating and reheats so much worse than the rest of what is there. The garlic changes that, enhances it. You might still be visiting Uncle Heartburn eating it the next day (Nova does that anyway I find), but those garlicy burps will remind you of a delicious experience nevertheless. Maybe save date night for the next day though, or the day of. 


#56 - Castro's Lounge -- B--
2116 Queen Street East
  

The first B! It's a weak B though, at a place that wins way more points for atmosphere and coolness than it does for pizza. As a pizza though, it's very satisfying but dear god I cannot eat that much cheese. Not a lie, I had planned to make a pasta the next day and thinking thriftily (to be generous), I grabbed a good 40 percent of the cheese off this pizza, put it in a napkin for myself and goddamn there was STILL TOO MUCH CHEESE ON THIS DAMN THING! I don't like to yell but it looks like you could dive in and take a swim, not that I'd recommend it since they don't have a lifeguard on duty.

It was an enjoyable pizza though (once I'd liberated the excess curds). The sausage was tasty, good hearty sauce and the crust soft even once the pie had cooled off. Castro's is one of my favourite spots in the Beaches for their live music, cool bands and great garage vibe and craft beer selection. I wouldn't seek them out for their pizza, but being there and potentially being hungry I'd order one again (maybe vegan this time though).

Next time... the list gets tighter. More pizzas!