Sweet thing, I watch you
Burn so fast, it scares me
Mind games, don't leave me
Come so far, don't lose me
It matters where you are
Another Tuesday, another Taste. Last week's review was a serious challenge with my ill health, severe lack of sleep and compromised energy. This week is a serious challenge because... I'm very bad at waking up early. An entire adult lifetime of mostly working nights, so usually any early daytime shifts I simply wouldn't eat anything beforehand. Not a dietary habit I (or anyone) would recommend.
Hey though, since I couldn't do anything special last week, consider this the 26th Episode super-show breakfast article! Or something! Ah whatever. Still, as much as any meal can be one worthy of celebration and enjoyment, breakfast has a particular appeal. Something about starting the day off with something tasty and satisfying, especially when you're a rare breed like myself and don't drink coffee.
How about breakfast in sandwich form? A good breakfast sandwich can truly be a stellar addition complimenting a long day, either at that sunrise beginning or that needed energy boost around noon. While their nutritional benefits can be dubious, there's no doubt a good breakfast sandwich is a delight. With all that in mind, lets take a look at some of the more readily available ones.
A&W's Sausage N'Egger
First off, the sesame seed bun is a grower. I remember initially trying one of these quite a few years back and finding the composition of breakfast with a burger bun rather off-putting (for the record, as much as I love them, I never get english muffins if given a choice for these because I find places never toast them enough for my liking).
This is a very soft sandwich, with really only the sausage patty providing any sturdiness. The eggs are fairly milky in taste and texture, flaking apart nicely in each bite. The sausage provides some needed saltiness (thankfully not too much) and is agreeably juicy. There's a good balance of everything here and I also appreciate how well melted the cheese is (more on that later). I do wish there was a bit more crispiness somehow with this (like maybe the outer edge of the bun), but otherwise a very strong offering.
(Also, I am aware that this is now the third item I've reviewed from A&W and none have been an actual beef burger. We work in strange and confounding ways here at the TT).
Tim Horton's Breakfast Sausage Biscuit
It wouldn't be a Tuesday Taste without a slice of nostalgia pie, so settle in. I actually used to eat these about twice a week: back when I worked daytimes at the Friar and Firkin downtown I'd often wake up too late to make a proper breakfast (story of my life) so I frequented the Tim Horton's next door to inhale one of these sandwiches before we opened the doors to patrons.
Big surprise, I got tired of these sandwiches pretty fast as they were, so I started adding extra ingredients. Sometimes a dollop of the Firkin chipotle mayo, or just bringing a cucumber or various greens from home. Even then, after maybe a year of eating these every week there was just no saving it.
This review was the first time I'd eaten one of these since working at the Friar (I left in 2019) and man that flavour is still endlessly familiar... except for one thing: the eggs. Indeed, it seems that Tim Horton's changed their eggs some time ago... something I'd completely forgotten about until actually unwrapping this thing. Hey, gives me more to write about.
The Tim's breakfast sandwich is serviceable... with positives and also serious flaws. The biscuit itself gives a nice buttery taste and the crunchiness on the outsides are delicious, but it can also be seriously dry once you get in the middle of it. The sausage patty... it's fine but aggressively salty. As for the eggs... I think I prefer the older omelette style (even if it wasn't freshly cracked) but to be honest neither are amazing. This new over-hard creation certainly gives more of an egg taste, which is good, but it also has a more stiff, rubbery texture and the yolk within resembles more of a deviled egg (which I am not a fan of). It's not as bad as some people are arguing... to me it's just "meh".
My biggest issue is actually how goddamn much processed cheese this thing has. The slice is too big for the sandwich itself (as you can see) and I find myself peeling off a lot of it since it dominates every bite enough as it is. Plus it just doesn't melt enough to actually blend into the sandwich, which is why it's such a presence. I'd say, after nearly two years of not eating these... I'm not in a hurry to have another one anytime soon.
Country Style's Classic Breakfast Bagel
Full disclosure: I went into this one not expecting much. Even back in my junior high days of scavenging nickels and dimes so I could snack on doughnuts en route to school, I still wasn't a fan of what Country Style offered.
That being said, believe me when I say this is one of the worst things I've ever reviewed. Hell, one of the worst things I've ever ordered from anywhere. Calling it dreadful would be an insult to dreadfulness.
Warning sign #1 was definitely after I ordered and heard a "beep boop". Yessir, Chef Mike was on the job that day. I'm not a fan of microwaves in general but I admit they have a certain utility when it comes to reheating specific things. Eggs are not one of those things! At least, not when you're serving a product. All it really does is make them steamy, soggy in places and dry in others. Warm eggs are far superior to cold ones sure, but the trade-off here isn't worth it. Oh, the peameal bacon was also microwaved with it. Yeeeeeahhhh.
Warning sign #2 was, despite watching it go through a toaster conveyor, how strangely cold my everything bagel was only five minutes later. Sure enough, that thing was barely crispy and about as stiff as a tall glass of scotch. Definitely not baked that day. Plus, for an "Everything" bagel, this thing tasted like a whole lot of nothing. Dry poppy seeds, minimal hint of onion... a drunk dude pissing in the middle of the street in broad daylight isn't this pathetic.
Now you might be asking: "Hey Leeum, all this descriptive buildup is one thing, but even something that seems lacking in preparation could still be delicious, right?" First of all, hey spell my name correctly you. Secondly... yeah no that doesn't apply here. This thing had zero flavour beyond just bread and salt, as though anything resembling taste had been zapped out of it (wonder how that happened). There was actually cheese on this thing and I totally forgot until the final couple bites. The peameal bacon provides nothing beyond texture (and it's the texture of wet rubber, thanks Chef Mike)... the eggs are pastey and painfully bland, and the bagel is like chewing through styrofoam. I genuinely had a feeling of physical awkwardness after finishing this thing, as though my body was telling me "So... you really did that to me, huh."
Honestly the best thing about this experience was finding a nickel on the floor of the Country Style so I didn't have to break a 20 dollar bill. This sandwich should've cost a nickel... way to limbo underneath my already low expectations. Just wow.
Sunset Grill
A place so famous Don Henley wrote a song about it? Not exactly.
This is a bit of a different one, since Sunset Grill is more known as a sit down diner than the other entries on this list. However they have nearly 100 locations so... worth a shot. Plus, the one closest to me here in the Beaches turns out is the original location. That's cool I guess.
There isn't too much to say about the sandwich itself beyond... it is greasy. Real greasy. The pictured home fries are even greasier, but lets stick with the main attraction. Everything aside from the bun seems a tad overlooked, with the edges of the egg showing that gross thin, crunchy plastic-like texture. Likewise the peameal bacon is a bit stiff and crunchy on the outer edge of the sandwich. This all definitely tastes of a flattop grill. Overall though... the sandwich is actually somewhat decent once you get past the outer dryness. The bacon is freshly fried, still warm even as I got home, while the egg doesn't overwhelm the sandwich but there is a healthy amount of it. This is also a huge sandwich. Good bun also: just the right mix of firm and soft to contain the contents within.
This definitely needs something else, if just to counteract the greasy fried flavour that oozes out of this thing. As is, it's an acceptable breakfast offering, though one dimensional in taste and increasingly dull once you're halfway through eating it.
Hey, have some grades and rankings:
A&W: B (it's a solid, filling and tasty sandwich)
Tim Horton's: C/C+ (it's okay, I've definitely had too many)
Sunset Grill: C/C- (classic greasy spoon breakfast... watch your arteries)
Country Style: F (just no)
Burnt Ends -- Not much beyond The Smiths discography article I also shared last week. There are some spots in my neighbourhood I want to go try though, so keep a lookout for those potentially.
A friend of mine I saw recently also reminded me of a project I've been considering for quite some time: reviewing and ranking the Star Wars trilogy movies. Now that would be fun. I'm not nearly as attached to Star Wars as I am to Star Trek, which for this purpose might be beneficial... bringing a more objective perspective to these films. Thing is... it's been 15 years and so I'd have to rewatch the prequels again. Gulp.
Tuesday Tune -- Not much to say about this one, since this is a band I'm only recently discovering. It's a great song though, and the whole "sun" motif fits my breakfast article so... listen away.
That's it for me for another week! Hope you enjoyed it and are enjoying yourself a tasty breakfast/lunch whatever it happens to be, wherever you happen to be. Until next time, stay safe, be kind to one another and don't spill that mustard.
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