Tuesday 25 June 2024

The Tuesday Taste - Wvrst (Godspeed Brewery)

 


While you're walking away

and I'm trying to get through

But you've got to know the lies

from the lies they've told you

If you try to do it all

it all will leave you

If you try to steal the beat

the beat will steal you 

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste!


Bit of an interesting week in these parts. Skipping the details... the right side of my body is indeed still in considerable pain as I write this on Sunday. But! Not painful: discovering Wvrst has a kitchen at Godspeed Brewery... which as an east-ender seems fairly lacksadasical on my part to not know that (it seems relatively new that Wvrst is there), but whatever! Hitting your head on hard things makes you more aware of things? (Please, no. That is obviously not true, don't try it). 

Wvrst has been a success for well over a decade now, starting out at their King West/Portland location (a large upstairs spot only featuring an ordering counter and very long benches for groups to sit at... take a number and chat while your order is being made). Chef Aldo Lanzillotta maintains, through every interview I've been able to find over that decade-span, that the intention of Wvrst was to bring Toronto something unique that the city did not yet have: a beer hall dedicated both to high end sausages of especially different varieties and local beer brewed with love and passion, and perhaps particulars that would match with these sausages cuisine-wise.

The timing could not have been more ideal. There are so many craft breweries in Toronto now that even I cannot keep track of them. I've never ever been to Red Tape! And it's a ten minute walk from my house! (stupid hill). 

Regardless, go back fifteen years and the craft beer scene in Toronto was yet to emerge from its infancy. Mill Street was still independent (and also still good), Amsterdam has sneakily been around even longer (also now owned by an international thingy) and Granite Brewery has been doing their thing in the Midtown area even longer longer (not a typo fyi) than that! But at the time, say 2009... "craft beer" in Toronto just wasn't a common thing you'd find. By 2014? You get Left Field Brewery, Bellwoods, Blood Brothers (possibly slightly later), Henderson's (also probably slightly later) just to name a few. As these older ones* got bought out by the conglomerates (and lost their creative mojo), these wonderful little ones sprouted up to fill that space and continue to produce interesting high quality suds. 

A craft beer renaissance here in Toronto, and not only here but pretty much everywhere in Canada. The market for interesting (tasty) smaller batch beer emerged in the early 2010s/late 2000s and now it's gotten to the point of being overwhelming. In a good way! 

*for the record, Moosehead is actually the oldest independent brewery in Canada. 1867 I believe! Moosehead is what it is (a very good reliable lager in my opinion) but it's funny to know that yeah! They aren't owned by any international/corporation whatever. Fuckin' good on them. I remember doing a staff tour at Mill Street right around after Labatt's had bought them out, and the guide explaining how this was "actually a good thing, allowing us to expand our reach and ideas". Naturally, all of their good ideas (Tankhouse, the Coffee Porter, Belgian Wit, the Lemon Tea, that wonderful Blueberry wheat beer I'll never forget ugh it was so damn good) faded away as they focused on pushing forgettable IPAs instead. 

Long way of saying (do I have any other way): Wvrst emerged at the perfect time to emphasize high quality food and local beer, opening their first location at King and Portland within that half-decade window I mentioned. I'd indeed been there quite a few times well before writing about this kind of stuff: they really take their beer selection seriously and that has always been appealing to me. It's absolutely not a surprise they would team up with a place like Godspeed. 

I know I know, I'll get to the actual 'food reviewing' of this food review soon, but allow me to quickly talk about Godspeed Brewery. I'd fit them into, lets call it the 'Second Wave' of the Toronto craft beer boon: not super new but they opened up at Coxwell and Gerrard sometime in the past six years, and have been extremely well regarded since their inception. The head of Godspeed, Luc "Bim" Lafontaine, worked as a brewer in Montreal and also previously lived several years in Japan... that particular overseas experience very much lending an influence into the unique flavours, ingredients (and names) of the beers Godspeed produces. 

 


 

They are a large open space (kinda has to be if everything is brewed on site) and by the sounds of it the ambition to expand is not a priority. Lafontaine seems to prefer this singular space where the quality of their offerings can be as precise and small batch as possible. This isn't a brewery you find in many LCBOs either, if any. You gotta go down to the place itself (they do have a retail shop) to sample it... but it is worth the trip (more on that later). 

 


 

Okay! How about the food. As I probably said about a century earlier in this article, Wvrst mostly focuses on German style sausages and thick Belgian-style fries. So, I got both of these things! Lets start with their well-known duck fat fries.

 


 

Duck fat fries! So... I'm not exactly sure why duck fat is considered a delicacy of sorts. I can taste an extra layer of something, so as an accentuation it's rather nice. Flavour-wise? Perhaps it serves to enhance what's already there? There's a thickness to the texture, not (thankfully) to the point of caking the mouth like a cheap fish and chips place. I can't really describe it: certainly something there, helping the overall experience, but to give it a look of precision? It's an enhancer, that's all I've got.

Certainly it works. These fries would be fine without it, but with? This is the good stuff. Excellent texture (delicate crisp on the outside, soft wonderful middle) and they wisely keep the skins on. The seasoning is likewise on point: nothing crazy beyond a slight dusting of salt. Long answer short: terrific fries. 

 


 

Time for the sausage party! Ugh, why did I make that joke... and why have I kept it in? 

Getting the excitement out of the way... Wvrst offers an intriguing variety of options, consisting of different meats (and vegetarian also) with bizarre mixes I thought impossible. The kitchen at Godspeed is more limited I suspect (breweries are big) but there are enough intriguing options nonetheless. I went for their bison sausage, blended with blueberry and maple according to their menu, and elected for the Currywvrst style rather than on a standard bun.

Normally I don't much care for whole grain bread, but in this particular circumstance... with a sausage this damn tasty... I'll make the exception. Perfectly toasted as well. In the bison, I definitely get more of a blueberry taste than maple, along with a slight herbal tea hint... and it's completely delicious. Perfectly fatty without being greasy, about as light tasting as a sausage can be. So much genuine flavour, and none of it resembling that classic oily grill taste. Thumbs up to the moon. Wicked good.

 


 

As for the sides: wasn't too blown away by the sauerkraut. Indeed very sour, with an odd beer-like flavour to it... entirely fine in terms of quality but just not my thing. The currywvrst sauce, however... much like a looser ketchup with an earthy kick to it. Great stuff, and quite nice with the fries.

 


 

Might as well review a Godspeed beer, while we're here (pardon the rhyme time). 

This 'Ochame' (which roughly translates as "playful mischief") is a green tea IPA and is unbelievably light, despite clocking in at six percent ABV. You get a bit of hoppiness in the smell and the initial taste, but the flavour of that fades nicely into a slightly bitter green tea aftertaste... all while the lightness of the body makes the whole thing very drinkable. Very interesting beer and while my enthusiasm for IPAs isn't what it once was, this is a terrifically unique one. Neat flavour and not obnoxious or assertive either. Strong recommendation.  

---


 

Overall! While I can't vouch for the Liberty Village or Union Station locations, I can definitely tell you the original on King Street and this particular one in Godspeed Brewery are indeed worth your time. Excellent stuff and I certainly recommend them. By comparison, the fries were merely quite good but that bison sausage... yowza. One of the best of those I've ever had, no doubt. Combine that with excellent beer... you've got a real winner. It's obviously a very specific (and at Godspeed more limited) menu so you'd have to be in the mood for this particular cuisine... but the beer itself at Godspeed alone is worthy of a visit.   

 


Dear Doug

I loved the Science Centre. Memories of it, as a child, illuminated my imagination and soul. A friend of mine is bringing his wife to Canada for the first time this summer, and I was considering a trip to the Science Centre as an excellent place to them to visit. Such a unique building and attraction. Oh well, lets get more dumberer. 

Back in the initial run of the TT, there was a segment every week wherein I'd justifiably lambaste our Premier of Ontario for his many egregious sins. Both for being an obvious fucking idiot, but also for just blatantly serving his own interests and not even being remotely clever enough to try hiding it. Apparently nobody cared! Eventually things in my life got better, the outward rage subsided into quiet grumbling disapproval. Hoo boy, it's time to unleash. Avert the eyes of the children. Still very few people care! But I do.  

All you caring about "culture wars" and drag queens being bad for children... can you open your fucking eyes and instead of some weird twisted fantasy see and react to the actual blatant corruption happening??? This province is going to hell and yeah, that's their intention. They WANT things to get worse, our public services to crumble, so that they can then say "here's a private option that's better (also owned by our political donors)" for you to pay for it! 

I'm obviously a left-leaning dude (if you've read my work this should be no shock) but political alignment aside... isn't accessible free healthcare, or well funded schools, or just accessible venues you can plan a day and bring your family to (aka: not a fucking spa for rich people) just generally acceptable and beloved? We can all agree on that, yeah?  

This... this piece of shit you'd find under your shoe... this motherfucker Doug Ford is so corrupt and so confident he's getting away with whatever he wants to do... his government is barely even trying to hide it anymore. Almost a billion dollars of OUR MONEY for a private spa nobody wants? Noooooobody! Criminally underfunding public assets so they depreciate to the point of "oh this is broken, privatize it!" Closing the wonderful Science Centre overnight with the flimsiest of excuses or notice (yeah get ready for another empty condo there, exactly what Toronto needs)... this isn't the work of a great leader. It's what a sloppy gangster does. 

To anybody who ever says "elections don't matter, they're all the same"... yeah well you can also go fuck yourself. Less than 50 percent of people voted in the last provincial election and this is what you get. Look, I've pretty much hated every Ontario premier in my adult life (and for the record I've voted in every election and never voted for any of those other morons) and even this is a new actively low painful thing to behold. 

Fuck Doug Ford. He doesn't give a shit about you, unless you're a wealthy developer happy to give him cash underneath some kind of fuckable table. Go to hell. A just universe would fire him into the sun, slowly.      


B-Rock

Now that the venom is out of my system, here's something much more positive. A buddy of mine from softball is legitimately doing good, inspirational work in sporting circles and I'm happy to share this featured story about him on Sportsnet. Genuinely a good dude, hilariously dry with his wit, and most importantly a darn good ballplayer heh and teammate. 

It's a hell of a story.  

https://www.sportsnet.ca/nhl/article/brock-mcgillis-isnt-afraid-to-have-the-conversations-hockey-needs/



 

Tuesday Tune

I'm glad this was the episode to completely dunk Doug Ford's stupid face in the toilet because, despite a tough week personally... everything else here you've read is glowing happiness. And here is one of my favourite songs* by one of my favourite bands... yeah at 36 years old I think I've accepted I'm indeed a hipster. But wait! I mean... yeah I ride a bike everywhere, I like wearing band shirts, have long hair and a beard, am a bassist, write a food blog, and... uh what were we talking about?

Anyhow, this song rules. The drums and bass on this track... good lord it brings a tear to my cold, injured eye. Not even gonna do the usual goodbye! Just listen to the song and don't, like I did, spill that mustard.  

 


 

 

 

 

*ugh and yes I know that isn't Feist (like on the studio recording) it's... I don't know. Probably Ariel Engle? I'm 98 percent certain of that. She sings it beautifully on this live version regardless. BSS rules, as does KEXP).                      

Tuesday 18 June 2024

The Tuesday Taste - Arby's

 


 

Hey!

Been trying to meet you

Hey, must be

a devil between us

or whores in my head

Whores at the door

whore in my bed  

But hey!

Where, have you, been?

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste!  


Naturally, upon seeing the title of this piece, your first thought will likely be "where the hell is there an Arby's in Toronto?" 

Answer: there isn't! Depending on whether you prefer going south-west into Burlington, or straight east into Oshawa... those are your closest options... on foot those are 50.9 and 58km respectively using the Toronto ferry terminal as a departure point, according to Google Maps. Get those running shoes on! 

It wasn't always this way. Back when I was in high school there was an Arby's location in one of the food courts in the Eaton Centre. Think I might've tried them once back then, no idea if I liked it (probably not if I only went once) and gave little notice or care whenever it was they departed (I rarely go to the Eaton Centre). This was not the only GTA Arby's to vanish in recent years... as the current total absence of Arby's in the 416 region has inspired a group of "activists" to publicly demonstrate/protest/something? about this fact. You be you, I guess. 

Astonishingly, this is a chain with over 3000 locations, the vast... vast... vast! (vast) majority of them operating in the United States. They were founded by the Raffel brothers in Boardman, Ohio in 1964, choosing the name 'Arby's' as a phonetic pronunciation of "R-B's" (Raffel Brothers). The Raffel brothers weren't interested in making just another dime-a-dozen burger restaurant, instead focusing on roast beef sandwiches in an attempt to create a more upscale fast food option. The concept was considered foolish at the time, and there were some severe logistical and financial difficulties in the first decade... but the brothers were ambitious and by the late 1970s Arby's had nearly a thousand locations throughout the USA. Here in 2024, Arby's 3300+ outposts is second worldwide only to Subway among sandwich (non-burger) franchises. Yep, I was as surprised as you are.

I was sincerely, with all my soul, hoping they would be at least better than Subway (which is probably my least favourite fast food chain ever). But before we get to the actual reviewing: first of all... how the heck did I even get to an Arby's? I live in the east end of Toronto and as I said, there isn't even one lurking inside Scarborough Town Centre... which is still stupidly far from me.

Well, I didn't walk (or bike) 50+ kilometres to get to one, that's for sure. No, Arby's has a location in St. Catharines and since I happened to be there for a few days to visit my sweet and lovely mum... I biked a much more reasonable 3km to experience what this "we have the meats" is actually all about.

I'm extremely unfamiliar with Arby's menu (having only been once two decades ago) but I knew if I was going to review them I had to go for the roast beef.. and I had to get some curly fries because curly fries (still kicking myself not getting the Burger Drops ones). Some of the other options surprised me: a french dip? A Rueben? I was tempted, not gonna lie... but I also wasn't sure yet if this was going to be completely terrible and so elected on a junior buffalo chicken sandwich as the sidekick. 

 


 

And here is that! As far as cheap ass junior chicken sandwiches go (but I was using my whole ass) this honestly isn't bad. It ain't good either: there's very little of that "chicken" element which is rather crucial to make a good chicken sandwich... but I appreciate the flavour contrast of buffalo sauce (which has some nice kick) and creamy mayo, and they wisely put lettuce on this thing as well (looking at you, A&W). 

I wouldn't get it again. It's like they put a large chicken tender into a sandwich and drenched it in sauces, although I do like this buffalo sauce. Sharper than what you might find typically. The chicken itself... entirely fine but not memorable in any way. The middle ground of "buying a box of it in frozen form" which is it's own indictment. 

 


 

Curly fries! If you read my Burger Drops review, or just a few paragraphs earlier of this one you are reading now... you'll likely suspect I love curly fries. They're such a rarity! Few places really offer them. Waffle fries and thick steak fries and crinkle cuts seem to be gaining some vogue, which is cool and all... but oily, crispy, slightly battered and or heavily seasoned curly fries are such a joy to me. I spent a lot of my childhood in California and there was this place in... Walnut Creek I wanna say? Anyhow, my aunt would take me there and I was just obsessed with their curly fries. There was nothing at all like it back in Toronto! They were so good... each fry was it's own special treat. 

It's obviously difficult to separate something so mythically beloved as a child from the cold objective eye of weary and hardened adulthood (life is fun, eh). Nothing can ever live up to the "idea" of what those delicious curly fries were to me in that time. Nor should anything try to... so lets examine these Arby's curly fries without the weight of an Altas-like nostalgia hanging over them. They're struggling to hold up enough as it is.

My verdict on these Arby's curly fries! Meh. Just... very okay, much like the chicken sandwich. If they were a little crispier that would help, but the biggest problem is the lack of seasoning. There isn't a dusting of spicy powder or pepper or garlic or anything. The crispy texture is kinda there, kinda, but it needs more taste. So much more. After a couple fries you're going straight for the dipping sauces and hey, lets talk about those

 


 

On the red right is what they call the "Arby's Sauce", while on the left is the famous (infamous?) Horsey Sauce. I have to confess... it never occurred to me until finally trying it why it was called "Horsey" sauce. My thought process in the moment: "Hmmm... like a mayo, but with a hint of horseradish! Interesting I wonde---ohhhh now I get it." I might be a fine writer, but I'm far from the quickest spoon in a knife fight.

These two sauces don't really yield much to discuss. The "Horsey Sauce" is certainly interesting via how uncommon this type of flavour/condiment is among big fast food chains, and yet that angle still does fit comfortably alongside their cold cut sandwiches agenda. 

Myself... I really like the nasal sting of horseradish and this particular sauce is a beginner's course into that. To be fair, I doubt an enormous chain like Arby's would offer an insane eye-watering congestion clearer as a sauce (in packets no less) but I gotta say it how I seen it (or saw it) and this Horsey sauce is more sauce than horse. It's a generic mayo with just enough of a horseradish kick in the back to be somewhat different. Overall... decent as a dip but not exceptional. Better than the usual generic fare. 

As for the "Arby's Sauce"... yeah this is some weak stuff. I can barely even tell what this is supposed to be. Sweet and sour? A thicker glob version of Swiss Chalet's "Chalet Sauce"? (also horribly overrated, hurl your pitchforks please). Is it a sweet faint BBQ sauce meant for the sandwich? It certainly does faint before it reaches your tongue. I don't get it, and there's so little to it I'm struggling to even describe why it's awful. But it is. An absolute nothing. 

 


 

Onto the main attraction, the specific thing the Raffel brothers focused on over half a century ago to separate their brand from all the burgeoning burger chains: the roast beef sandwich. 

Here's the thing: I can appreciate the small details while simultaneously firing my missiles into their execution. An onion bun! And the bun is nice and soft throughout (not the stale crap you find at McDonald's). Problem is... texture yes, but you don't really taste any of these details. The onion bun is such a slight hint that you forget it's presence within two bites. 

The roast beef itself is... okay-ish. On a quality level it probably matches the prepackaged stuff you'd find in a cheaper supermarket like Food Basics or FreshCo...  it tastes like roast beef no doubt, but there just isn't a whole lotta "ooomph" to it. No secondary taste or anything that lasts longer than a fleeting moment. This really is a fast food roast beef sandwich: gone before it's even over. 

Perhaps I'm being overly mean. But... it's hard to write about this because like the curly fries, this roast beef sandwich is simply meh. Precise in it's inoffensiveness. There isn't much to say because there isn't anything notable about it! Even the cheese sauce is your typical run of the mill, nacho cheese goo that comes out of a 7/11 dispenser, and there isn't a whole lot of that on here anyway. The only thing that really works is the texture: the softness of the bun makes the experience of eating it fairly pleasant, and that brief connection of onion bread and roast beef is enjoyable. 

But I'm grasping at straws here, and unfortunately this is also one of those sandwiches (hell, everything I tried frankly) that tastes much better on the first bite, but as you approach the last you're thinking more of just getting it over with. Much like my general impression of Arby's regarding this review: at first I was slightly impressed and thinking this was much better than my worst instincts had feared... but at the end the realization of nothingness creeps in. Positivity! Surely that's my style, ain't it. 

 


    

Overall... seriously, dozens of people devoted their time to go out and make a public demonstration why there isn't one of these in the central Greater Toronto Area? Can I have some of your free time? Clearly you are not using it wisely. 

I don't recommend Arby's at all, nope. But... I also don't regret finally giving them a good look and while the failings of all these items were how bland and forgettable they were... nothing was outright bad (aside from the "Arby's Sauce"). I would happily take that meh roast beef sandwich over any McDonald's burger or a Whopper, which as I've previously said offend me via sheer careless disgust.

I'll give Arby's some points: they are different. As a consumer, it is a different feeling going to a spot and ordering a roast beef sandwich instead of a cheeseburger. You can get a cheeseburger anywhere, but getting something resembling (and I use "resembling" very loosely) a deli sandwich, is a unique little corner of the fast food market. 

And I'll say it again to finish this review off... I didn't think Arby's was bad. I was expecting the worst, as Simpsons and Seinfeld jokes raised me to believe. They occupy a bizarre middle ground... well above the ocean depths of the terrible but looking up at the surface of unregrettable decency. Honestly... if you must I'd say do what I did and try them out of curiousity, but only for that reason and only once.

 

---

 

Funky Jobs On The Run

I've worked a lot of various jobs in my adult life, the vast majority of them in bars/restaurants, and as such some of the extremely brief ones do stand out in my memory for something comedic and/or bizarre. Enjoy this new semi-short feature on the TT. 

Uncle Betty's/Worldwise Partners

With a decade of reflection... looking back at 2012 I realize how I've overlooked the extent of the chaos happening in my life at that time. 

I moved twice that year (the first time having to abandon much of my furniture because of neighbouring bedbugs), quit a dead-end but still steady job at Pizzeria Libretto (while in the process of the second move of that summer)... all while starting to study English Lit at University of Toronto despite living in three very different and distantly separate areas of Toronto. 

As a 24/25 year old it wasn't easy but mostly I shrugged it off in the end, and I was also endlessly fortunate to have a partner at the time with godlike patience, virtue and emotional support. Now... as a single soon-to-be 37 year old? Just writing about that level of madness makes me want to melt into the floor. There's a certain saying of "I wish I knew what I know now, when I was younger". This particular job story definitely connects with that philosophy. 

2012 was, as described above, very chaotic for me. I'd quit a reliable job (again, knowing there wasn't much of a future), went to California with my wonderful lady for a few weeks, and then came back to Toronto in an shared house I'd lived in for barely a week... without much of a plan regarding how to pay the bills. Almost instantly (like two days after being back in Toronto) I scored a job as support staff at Uncle Betty's: a quirky Midtown brunch spot that at the time (they've been closed for a while now I believe) would have serious lineups on weekends, which is mostly when I worked. 

Hate to say it, because it was a small spot and the husband/wife owners were good people... but this was an awful job. At least, as a support staff. You'd be busting your ass: running food, clearing/resetting tables fast because of the lineups, refilling coffee cups... and these servers were just complete total assholes. Barking at you, not helping to bus, questioning your speed as you frantically try clearing a table with a dozen plates solo, demanding everything while chilling in the corner now and again... 

Look, now I'm in my 30s and for nearly a decade I've bartended far busier places than this dumb little brunch spot could've ever dreamed of... but I can also say in those absolute toughest situations dealing with the worst kinds of people I've never been an outright dick about things, especially to my co-workers. Have I gotten frustrated? Of course! But with a rare exception or two (including a baseball podcaster I'm fond of...) the servers at Uncle Betty's treated you like grunt work dirt, as did one of the owners when you were on the floor. 

Hey, you can live with that in a busy environment as long as the money is good... right? Ha! Uncle Betty's is the third worst job I've ever had because... I'll never forget my first brunch shift, the moment after busting my stupid tail for six straight hours of a packed restaurant... each server must've sold well over two grand and walked out with multiple triple digit bills in tips for themselves... and getting fifteen bucks from all four of them combined. Fifteen fucking bucks! Oh, and a "thank you for your hard work" of course. 

Remember... even at this young age I'd worked Libretto and the Madison and The Drake Hotel already... I knew what a busy service was like and this was like that, This is also working at the old minimum wage... Server's Minimum I may add... so like ten an hour? Fifteen bucks??? When the place is rammed for an entire afternoon, with a constant lineup, and there are twenty tables plus a patio? What... the... fuck? Fifteen bucks wasn't even enough to order myself some much needed food off of their menu! 

I am kicking a dead-horse, seeing as Uncle Betty's has now departed and the only other two jobs I've had that were worse... were much, MUCH worse... nevertheless this does lead into my experience with Worldwise Partners. Hoo boy. 

---

Genuinely I wanted this segment to be exclusively about my experience with Worldwise... but the Uncle Betty's tale actually works as a background to accentuate how desperate I was. I wasn't thinking entirely rationally, just seeking anything to free or distract me from a truly demeaning restaurant gig... and so seeing a job posting for an entry level marketing position, then getting an interview almost immediately... well I was 25 and the twinkle in my eyes hadn't yet faded as much. 

Weird job interview. A bunch of other people, in a relatively nice office waiting space near Victoria and Wellington. Quick chat, instant job? Again... the twinkle can blind you. I think it was that same Friday, possibly the very next day but perhaps a couple days later after the interview... I was summoned for a "trial shift" of sorts.

Here's the thing, and why legally this company could say this was an "entry level marketing" job, and why I can also say within reason how this wasn't a total scam, not really... but also a complete misleading fucking deceptive lie and misdirection. Looking back... yeah neither the posting or in the interview did they really explain what the job exactly was, or what the work involved required... deliberately vague to a point they could've driven us out to a farm and had us shovel cow manure, with a crisp 20 dollar bill for the person who shovels the first 100 pounds. It would've been equally honest... or rather, as honest as a lie of omission can be. 

I guess I was expecting some kind of office thing, where I'd (uncomfortably) have to call people on the phone. This was my anticipation arriving again at the same Victoria and Wellington office early that Friday morning. There were four of us plus a supervisor, who immediately and energetically informed us we'd be heading out on the road to spread the good word. Uhhh... okay.

Onto the subway we went, paying our own fares, and to the Yonge and Eglinton area... hilariously close to where Uncle Betty's was. Our first stop? The food court of that mall for lunch and that was also on our own dimes (I ordered nothing for the record, as to my credit I was quickly becoming uneasy about all of this). 

Cleverly, to make this seem more legitimate... one of the 'trainees' among us was more of a veteran. "About a month he's been with us and already has impressed, getting promoted and scoring all the bonuses!"... praises he nodded at with a confident charisma. Indeed he did the job with either genuine or extremely well acted conviction. 

By the way! Yeah the job was canvassing... aggressively canvassing... like wandering down streets and knocking on people's doors and pitching them something that frankly I'm still not sure was indeed legitimate. The sale was all environmentalism and saving forests or oceans and asking for donations for these seemingly just causes but... I mean come on. Even 25 year old me, with a pretty girlfriend, a twinkle in his eye and also needing cash desperately... even he couldn't help smell the fishiness of it all. 

Alas... I wandered about the very wealthy side-streets south of Eglinton and Yonge for a solid few hours, on a chilly late December afternoon I was underdressed for (again thinking I wouldn't be fucking outside for a significant period)... going door-to-door asking for money like shifty trick-or-treaters. I hung back and never actually knocked on a door or spouted any manipulative bullshit... an honest truth I will repeat should the heavenly gates exist and look over my file. 

Beyond the moral vacuum of being adjacently involved (and there were a few older folks we knocked on who did buy in...) this was such a long and unpleasant experience just by how cold it was. Again, they didn't give any kind of notice that "Hey! You'll be outside for a significant period and it's December in Toronto, so dress warm!". I've even checked my old emails (legit from 11 years ago) from Worldwise just to confirm this assertion! Nothing about it at all. 

Lets wrap up this gross tale. I'd also learned, as we were already knocking on poor unsuspecting people's doors, that this was a commission based job without any hourly wage. Goody. Well, for reasons that still baffle me I stuck this through until the early evening. Our supervisor dude took us into a comfortable coffee shop on Mount Pleasant, spoke highly and happily of everything/whatever we'd done and asked each of us how we felt about coming aboard the team and being a part of something that was going to "change the world!".        

He came to me and I said no.

There was a mild surprise, perhaps a faint follow up of "you don't want to be on this revolutionary team blah blah" but I was already grabbing my bag and politely saying this just wasn't for me. On one hand... I mean yeah no shit I should've just ditched these fucking idiots within five minutes... but on the other, well younger me was far more meek and although I knew halfway through this charade that I wasn't going to ever talk to these people again... I felt I had to do it properly at the very end. Unfortunately I was in a fall jacket and it was two degrees that day... 

---

One final thing: when we were in that Eglinton/Yonge food court for lunch, I mentioned off-hand that I worked at a restaurant nearby, to which the supervisor jovially commented "you'll have to hook us up there!" 

It's a comment that has never settled with me... not only because I'd already then given my notice at said restaurant, or that I couldn't have 'hooked them up' even had I wanted to... it was just such a hollow thing to say. An assumption (at best) that we were all this tight knit team... while you're my "supervisor" and I've barely known you for twenty minutes over a surprise subway ride that came out of my own wallet. Some of the best, most excellent people I've ever met and currently know in my life have been my supervisors at work, but that is something earned and gained over time... not just assumed and granted in the span of a confusing half hour.     

Anyhow... I never got paid (never made a sale, bless me) and little did I know the bad restaurant job I was in the process of quitting, or this rejected flimflam trial shift... wouldn't be light-years close to as horrible as the job I took at the very end of 2012... but that's another tale soon to be told.     

Also, if you don't totally believe me... here's a fine account of Worldwise that strangely parallels my own (funny that... honestly I did not write that).

     

 

23

I'm more than just a charming food reviewer you know ("charming" claim not yet validated by our lawyers here at WC Street). I recorded an album of very lo-fi songs which is free to listen should your ears be happy to. No pressure, I just welcome any kind of feedback... making music is an equal passion to writing for me (I'm just typically much shyer about it).

https://mixedmetaphors.bandcamp.com/album/xxiii 

 

Tuesday Tune

I was very sad that Pixies played my work a couple of Saturdays ago (I don't work Saturdays there) and I couldn't be there. Even without Kim Deal... it would've been pretty cool to see them. So, here's a great song off one of their great albums (I go back and forth between this or Surfer Rosa as my favourite).

 


 

That's all for this week! Certainly felt like an Arby's night. Until next time... stay cool (it's hot this week), stay safe, and most importantly of all don't spill that mustard.

                        

Tuesday 11 June 2024

The Tuesday Taste - Dang Smoke BBQ

 

 



It was a tight toy night

streets so bright

The world was so thin

between my bones and skin

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste! This time, it's a dang good one (see what I did there).

 

Dang Smoke BBQ is actually named for the owner, Dang Quach. Like many BBQ joints, they started out as a food truck operation (back in 2017) and gained enough of a steady following to open a permanent location in Leslieville. They inhabit the old location of burrito spot Chino Locos, which some dork might've also reviewed back in the day. 

 


 

Not a complicated menu, and the space itself is ridiculously small (a wooden counter with a few seats along the front window is all you get). Should there be another person or two waiting for their food, it's going to be cramped. There is a little bench outside, however.

Also... their front door is very hard to open. Like, it requires a full strength, put-your-legs-into-it powerful yank. I arrived in the middle of a Sunday afternoon and my initial reaction to this unexpected obstacle, knowing that they often close earlier than listed hours because they sell out of things... well your first reaction is to raise in eyebrow in confused apprehension. Later when I was inside waiting for my food, the very same thing happened again to a young lady and her boyfriend. Because it is such a small place/operation (only a FOH person taking orders behind a counter and a BBQ cook behind in the open kitchen) I imagine it's a consistent difficulty to relay the stubborn stuckness of this door (I myself opened it for them, only just to relieve their confusion after a pair of failed attempts... yes yes not all heroes wear capes, some also have food review blogs).

Speaking of that food (and not big heavy doors intent on keeping BBQ goers hungry) I went in with a definite plan, accepting no substitutes. Or rather, I would've had to come back another day instead of accepting a substitute (insert 'The Who reference' here). 

This was my first ever time and I was curious about the Mac n'Cheese... but what truly tantalized me most was that brisket sandwich. That was the headliner that pulled me here the most. 

 


          

Back in the days of when Caplansky's was on College or greasy old (delightful) Mel's Diner was in the Annex slinging that gigantic both-terrible-and-also-awesome Montreal smoked meat poutine... I've always just loved a good smoked meat, in any form, when done right (in those days it was almost always dropped atop a saucy or cheesy poutine but alas I was twenty a long time ago). 

There is a certain extra flavour and texture to when a meat is smoked so precisely, and the meat is likewise so well seasoned, of good quality, with just the right amount of tenderness and fat. This particular photo (damn sunny day) is deceptive because the shadows are hiding the true nature of this brisket sandwich. First glance, it looks fairly saucy but perhaps dry or chewy at points. Rather, it is much more the reverse.

The BBQ sauce you get is on the sweeter side... like a good subtly tangy whiskey BBQ sauce... but it is definitely there as an assist not an attraction. No, the brisket dominates this sandwich: Dang Smoke offer additional toppings like mushrooms or onions but none of that for me. At the time I shook those off with the intention of experiencing this brisket at full influence. Next time, I'll likewise shake them off but as mere distractions. 

What makes this such exceptional brisket are the dimensions of texture. The flavour is great too, but taste-like an excellent smokey beef brisket doesn't take much to describe beyond: it's an excellent smokey beef brisket. Okay fine... there are some nice touches of rubbed in seasonings along the occasional edges you get in a bite (very sharp but not hot spices) and the tiny hint of the sweet BBQ is important as an extra something... but the texture is the star.

These are your classic thick flat cuts of brisket: the tender parts in the middle and those delectable not-quite-burnt but tougher, chewier, and loaded with a particular fall apart in your mouth taste of well roasted/smoked meat. The smokiness runs throughout, but especially on either horizontal end of each brisket slab. Meanwhile when you're more in the middle of the sandwich, you're deeper into the soft bun and right into the centre of the slow cooked beef, which despite its thickness is still so tender and full of flavour even on a bite lacking fattiness (and this was not an overly fatty sandwich either for the record). 

I don't have much else to say. They pull it right out of the foil and slice it to order, and I can see why it runs out quickly. As a sandwich it needs no other frills beyond that meat. I'm sure mushrooms or slaw or onions or whatever you fancy would be a pleasant addition no doubt... but in my mind this is the type of rare beef (see what I did there) sandwich that can stand tall in its well-prepared but also sheer simplicity. 

 


     

I won't take as long on the mac n'cheese (we all have places to be I'm sure, even me) but I'll start by saying I'm a bit of a mac n'cheese snob. A close friend made (and still does I'm sure) a completely dynamite one for me many times... I can make a pretty darn good one from scratch myself... and way way before that in my very very young days working at the Drake Hotel I got to experience Anthony Rose's version (and the man likes his saucy richness).

Long way of saying: in Mac n'Cheese Land it's tough to really blow me away. Also, is Mac n'Cheese Land a real place? I'd still go.  

This one from Dang Smoke... doesn't blow my socks off because I wish it had just a little more to it. Green onions/chives, or an additional earthy cheese... I could've just added brisket as an extra charge which obviously would've done the job but that's cheating. 

That said, this mac n'cheese on its own is still quite good when considered purely as a sharable side. From that perspective, there is plenty to enjoy. The bread crumbs? Not just there for show... they give the upper layer a tiny little crunchiness but not to the point of disrupting the creaminess below. The pasta itself is on point, and I do lean on the side of a much creamier mix in my mac n'cheese and this certainly delivers that without the excess of having the noodles just swimming around.

There's some hint of richer, parm-like cheese in here, but the most distinctive element is the mix of that creaminess I mentioned and an occasional thick gooey cheese within. Stretchy and stringy on certain forkfuls. Very nice balance. The hearty portion size is also a nice deal: even without the sandwich it would've been a challenge to polish this off by myself (definitely a good sharable dish), and so a majority of it made a delightful snack later that night. 

Everything I'm saying is indeed a positive, as it should be! This is no throwaway Mac on a menu as a forgettable side... spruced up Kraft Dinner this is not. They put as much consideration into this recipe as they do their BBQ it seems. It's still missing that one something... it's so close to being incredible... but as is? Extremely simple, but extremely good.


Coleslaw? Yeah damn it I forgot to try the coleslaw. For shame....

 

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Overall! Dang Smoke BBQ is... bloody smoking good, I say chaps! Before we leave the flat and meet our blokes at the pub, spot me a few schillings for the extra chips and then a yardie on me! Do they even have southern style BBQ joints in England? I'm genuinely curious. London, maybe? 

Anyhow yeah they're truly fantastic, well worth the wait and suspense of a couple of failed attempts on my part to try them, and I strongly recommend trying them too. Their hours are very weird: not open Monday-Wednesday, close early in the evening most days, and they sell out of stuff often (there's usually a sign outside their window to alert people). If I may reiterate... it's a reaaaaally small space, and a small staff as well I imagine. Funny enough as I was preparing to leave with my food, two young women walked in to hand in printed resumes. Printed! Didn't think anyone still did that anymore, never-mind people half my age. 

If you want to try them (and if BBQ is your thing you should) be sure to plan significantly ahead or just happen to be in the area, but they are real, real... smoking good. Hehehehe...          

 

---


Dark of the Matinee 

The Red Letter Media lads have a long and interesting discussion/brainstorm about the decline of movie theatres, why it's happening and ideas how to fix it. Really fascinating, well-thought stuff and done in their typically amusing way.



 

Coming Soon!

I missed last week (stupid allergies ruined a lot of things last week) but I've got something really fun to make up for it... coming soon! Also no weird work tale this week, either... but I've got plenty more of those too.

 

Tuesday Tune

An incredible and quasi-forgotten rock record, made in the general era of Disco versus Punk. The guitars on this album are truly something (Verlaine could play, man). 



  

That's all for now! Until next time, whenever it may be... stay cool, be cool, and most of all don't spill that mustard.



Tuesday 28 May 2024

The Tuesday Taste - Burger Drops

 


 

Take it all back cause

it don't mean nothing

If you give it away

and you're looking for something back

Looking for something back

Wake up every morning when there's nothing there

No reason to die

but no reason to care 

 

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste! 

 

Seeing as one of my gigs happens to have me at BMO Field frequently on Saturday nights, and Liberty Village happens to have something happening to be regarded as a top notch Toronto burger, and I happened to be hungry after a busy shift, and they happen to close at ten o'clock which is very close to when I typically happen to finish a shift... well you can guess what happened. I went to Panago and got a crummy pizza, then went home and watched M.Night Shyamalan's The Happening.

In all seriousness... Panago is actually just very meh. Definition of damning with faint praise. Fortunately... that is not where I went, nor is it what we're talking about today. Instead, it's Burger Drops! 

Hip smash burgers have become a trend here in Toronto, with many following the burger bible of the famed NYC legend Shake Shack (soon to open a spot in the 416 area code). It's not exactly a new thing to the Toronto food scene: for ages some old diners have surely been doing some variation on a greasy burger pressed into crunchy thinness, while Rudy got a big head-start on making it trendy in more recent years...  yet now does seem quite an era of this specific style popping up to offer the Rudy/Shack more refined version of this burger.

Since their turn-of-the-decade inception, first as a pandemic curbside pop-up by chef Greg Bourolias (formerly of Aloette) which quickly evolved into the current Liberty Village spot... Burger Drops has appeared on most of any "Top Toronto Burgers" list, including one by the owner of another burger joint we reviewed not too long ago. Despite this success and popularity, Liberty remains their singular location... which normally and previously disqualified a spot for the TT review in these parts. But... as I wrote last week I can only review the absurdly huge fast food chains so many times before it becomes pointlessly redundant... plus Burger Drops background as a mobile pop-up and the apparent existence of a food truck means we'll let the old rules slide.

Going in, the plan was to keep things simple: their 'original' cheeseburger and some cheese fries (I cannot resist cheese fries in almost any form). Like most new Toronto burger joints of this vintage, Drops keep the menu very straightforward: your standard single or double burger option, some kind of fried chicken offering, a desserty-thing or two, a vegetarian choice, and maybe some kind of poutine or chili addition for the fries. 

But oh... oh. Burger Drops offer something I delight in more than even cheese fries... curly fries! Man, I freaking love curly fries... and you have no idea, dear reader, how difficult it was for me to hold fast with my original plan. These cheese fries have a jalapeno relish on top as well... intriguing enough to end up as the tie-breaker.

 


 

Since we're talking about cheese fries, here be they. Those crinkle cuts, like these modernized smash burgers, are also really becoming a thing too, aren't they? Cool sure, but even writing this now I'm still thinking about what those curly fries might be like...

You might look at this and wonder, as I initially did: "Uh, where's the cheese?" It is definitely in there, just most of it pools at the bottom, and there's a good amount. This was a quick photo as well, maybe five minutes after getting my order... so not a case of things being jostled about en route. 

As fries... they're fine. Pretty good even, at points. I'd like a little more crispiness with all of them, and the seasoning isn't really much. The ones that have the crisp are great... but other fries (about 50/50) were a little too soft and especially the ones swimming in the cheese pool. 

As for that cheese... it's that classic American cheese taste. They nail the specific flavour: like a much better and authentically cheesier version of gooey nacho cheese-product you might buy in a jar, or find on tap at a 7/11. Full honesty, I love a good cheese sauce and this particular style of it has never quite been my thing... still I'll appreciate it when it is done with this strong level of quality. Plus, one positive of the pool of it at the bottom is controlling how much you want with each dipped fry.

The jalapeno relish was far more interesting. A really nice sweetness, some spice, a good consistency that gave some sting through that heavy sauce (which really just congeals as it cools). I quite liked this relish a lot, and think it would also work brilliantly on a burger (Drops thinks along with me, offering it as an addition for a couple bucks).

 


  

Onto the burger and... these guys really like their American cheese, don't they. 

While I'll reiterate my "meh" feelings towards American cheese (especially on grilled cheese sandwiches, nope)... I'll concede that a hamburger, and especially this particular type of hamburger, is the exception. There is just something about that slightly plasticy taste combined with a greasy, fried crispy (on the outside) beef patty that just works so well. The cheese has to be well-melted for it to really work (another reason I can't stand McDonald's... that cheese could probably emerge from being thrown into the sun in still its packaged shape) and when it does, magic. Score one for Burger Drops.

There's quite some significant sweetness in this burger, mostly from the potato roll and the griddled onions. Still, the overall balance is on point (having some quality pickles to counteract the onion helps) and keeps the main attraction as being the beef itself. Man, it's another take on the old school greasy burger done right: the crispy edges, oily all around, lots of flavour in the beef and it's both juicy and still cooked more Medium-Well than Medium. Great textures throughout. Not a thin patty either: a single of this size was exactly what I am usually looking for.

Another little touch I greatly appreciated: the slight toast of the buns. In-N-Out are the masters of this, somehow keeping that center of the bun soft but having a perfect thin circle around the outer bottom edge of the bun have this amazing buttery crunch. Such a nice touch, and this Drops burger aims for that and gets it right as well. 

 


           

Overall! I think their placement in the upper tier of Toronto burgers is well deserved. But... are they actually the best as some might say? Or, at least one of my favourites that I've tried in my fairly limited burger adventures (what is this, pizza)? 

Of the ones I've reviewed recently... I think Harry's blew me away just a little more, and Friday's was, while also a smash burger, one of similar strong quality to Drops but a bit more in tune with my particular tastes. Less sweet and oil, more body and dimension... hey though this is all good stuff and we're arguing in millimetres here.  

Burger Drops is terrific, and I do highly recommend them. It's got more of that dirty, greasy griddle taste to it than those others... but in such a way that won't leave your stomach turning immediately afterwards. Like a dirty diner burger done with great prep, detail, and ingredients (those sweet onions really are an important secret weapon). 

Since their main beef burger options are either the 'Original', which I had, or the 'American', which swaps out the pickles for a ketchup relish, lettuce, and diced onions instead of the sweet ones... well seems a good excuse for a second visit some day. Those curly fries will be calling my name anyhow. 

 

---

 

Funky Jobs On The Run

I've worked a lot of various jobs in my adult life, the vast majority of them in bars/restaurants, and as such some of the extremely brief ones do stand out in my memory for something comedic and/or bizarre. Enjoy this new semi-short feature on the TT. 

SPIN

Back into the weird first ten-ish weeks of 2020 (did anything notable happen after early March? Things cooled down I figure). 

I'd actually been hired in February of 2020 by a job I still currently have, but the whole process of orientation, training, union stuff etc was dragging on and I needed cash quicker than this was playing out. There was a posting for support staff at a downtown bar near King and Spadina: I applied, got an interview the next day, and that very Friday was in for a training shift. Exactly March 6th, 2020. 

I hadn't been support for a night-time establishment in over half a decade at this point (already being in my early 30s, already significant years of bartending experience... wonder why) but bills are bills. The thing with SPIN though: not a typical King West-like place. It's a huge space slightly below ground level... but instead of fancy couches, dance floors and bottle service under strobe lights... the place had about a dozen ping-pong tables. Which is their thing: they're a ping pong bar/event space.

A chunk of the job was your typical support/busboy stuff: clear glasses, wipe tables, take out garbages etc... all that fun stuff. Meeting my other co-workers here in the same role, I was at least ten years older than any of them (never a great feeling for the ol' pride). This is where the job gets unique though, because the most important aspect of this support job wasn't the usual stuff I just mentioned, no sir or mam. 

Because this was a very busy ping pong bar, you've got plastic balls flying everywhere and ending up on the floor in corners and various random spots. So, the main priority was to collect them from the ground and continuously restock every table (there was some kind of basket thingy). How did we collect these dozens of ping pong balls flying everywhere? There were these Lacrosse-like sticks with nets that you would glide along the floor to scoop them up. And... you would be doing this constantly... at least every five minutes walking around with this netted device scooping up tiny balls. 

It wasn't the worst thing? Not really? I've had some real bad jobs and this wasn't that. But... it was very repetitive and time did not flow quickly... also the "being open until 2am so working past 3am" thing... been there, done that. 

My co-workers were all extremely nice. The bar manager bought me a beer once we'd closed on my second shift (the Saturday, March 7th) and I got paid in cash on the spot for both my hours and a bit of a support tipout. I knew this wasn't something I wanted to do (hell I was dreading both shifts on the streetcar rides there) but... possibly(?) I could've gotten through doing it a couple nights a week just for a while if the people and vibes were this generally positive.    

I'll never know either way. They offered me a position early the next week, which I accepted while warning my other new job with MLSE could conflict (they were okay with this). Three days later, the oncoming hell storm could not be ignored any longer. March 13th, 2020 (a Friday the 13th actually, which could've been worth a chuckle in retrospect but no, definite no). That same Friday would've been my long awaited first training shift at MLSE... turns out I'd have to wait a year and a half for that.

As for SPIN... whenever it was they reopened, I never got an invitation back. Likely I was just forgotten in the craziest shuffle of a generation... a random dude who worked a random weekend before the hail of ping pong balls was halted indefinitely. 

Looking back, it was a weird quirky gig I did for two weekend nights that doesn't hold any regret, disappointment, or pride in my memory. Can't even remember anyone's name. Just kinda... was there for a brief moment in time, a weird moment in a world about to be thrown off a cliff for a desperately long while. I still have the shirt they gave me though, and I do wear it sometimes.                  

 

Tuesday Tune

Sometimes I like my deep cuts. An overlooked tune on a less known record by an artist I dearly love. Other times, a song I dearly love might be their most famous, while I just kinda like a couple of their albums. This one is closer to the latter, although I do really like the first two records (the only two I know). And this song is a personal favourite regardless, one I've heard since a teen and still am as entranced by it as ever. Can't explain it.

 


 

Hey that's all for this week. Amazed I managed to get this done after four baseball games (okay three were Slo-pitch) and three long work shifts in the span of five days! Boo hoo, of course. Not getting my review done in time is hardly a universe altering event. But... it is an event of some relative accomplishment nevertheless. Until the next such event, stay cool out there, stay safe, and don't spill that mustard. 


        

Tuesday 21 May 2024

The Tuesday Taste - Good Behaviour

 


You and I

we were captured

We took our souls

and we flew away

We were right

we were giving

That's how we kept

what we gave away 

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste! And may I say, this week's particular review is only possible because I was on my best g... ...yeah no I just can't make the joke. It's too corny even for me. 

 

Anyhow, good fortune behaved enough for me to go try Good Behaviour! A place with sandwiches and ice cream? What more do you want? Seriously, tell me... TELL ME. No but seriously, admittedly this was not a place I was familiar with (hell I'd barely even heard of them). It must've been some tantalizing photo on the social medias that made me think "that looks good", leading me into looking them up, then seeing they have three locations... one of which is relatively close to me? Score! Yes, despite my many reviews I am far lazier than most people realize.

Good Behaviour as a concept is still in its relative infancy, about three-to-four years old by my research... their quick expansion from ghost kitchen into a trio of full fledged locations a testament to the quality of their offerings. 

It was born from co-owners Michael Lam and Eric Chow crossing paths while working at Ascari King West (now closed according to Google) and collaborating on an ice cream pop-up as a side-gig soon after. Their creative approach to flavours (a Hong Kong milk tea is not something you'll find at Baskin Robbins) and positive reception led to them pursuing this as a full time project, and so opened up an ice cream shop on Westmoreland Avenue in the Davenport neighbourhood here in Toronto. I'm about 95 percent confident this was their first location, but if I'm wrong please unsubscribe. Yank that 'like' button out of the keyboard.

Regardless of my factual accuracy, this appears to have been 2021 when Good Behaviour settled it's roots (wherever it was). At first their ice cream, which had gained them positive attention in the first place, was the singular attraction... but smartly (and rather quickly) they decided to offer sub sandwiches as well. Clearly this was also successful, they opened up a couple more locations and yada yada yada I showed up to the Gerrard East one on a Friday night I did!

This particular stretch of Gerrard East fascinates me, for the record. It's the "Little India" segment of Toronto, nicknamed as such because of the zillion Indian restaurants that occupy this fairly short stretch between Greenwood and Coxwell (just a hunch). Truly a lively pocket of East Toronto that is a ton of fun to walk through, with some sneaky fun dive bars among the excellent Indian restaurants and the awesome Greenwood Theatre (*cough* performed there *cough*) within it all. 

 


 

Good Behaviour fits this colourful, bit-of-everything vibe of Gerrard East also. I went inside expecting a simple sub shop... I did not anticipate a mini-speciality grocery taking up the entire area between the ordering counter and those two tables in front. Plenty of packaged ice cream and gelato for sale (shock) but also artisan frozen foods, like pizzas from Casa Nostra (a pizzeria based out of Port Credit specializing in supplying their frozen pies to small retailers).

 

Enough dawdling, here's the sub:  

 


 

Meatballs! While directly comparing their Italian cold-cuts sub against Lambo's might've been instructive... whatever! I was just craving a hot meatball sub, damnit. 

Points instantly to Good Behaviour for slicing this thing in half and presenting it open faced. As you can see, the ratio of 'meatball to everything else' is delightfully even at best... trying to eat this thing as a full enclosed sub? Two bites in you'd be staring at a few meatballs splattered upon whatever below surface you chose to eat this above.  

No matter how you slice it though (see what I did there), it is humanly impossible to eat a sandwich such as this without it being a fabulous mess. You can try your best, as I attempted, but it's gonna drip and droop and crumble and yeah just bring several times as many napkins as you might think you need. 

Getting into the tastes: well, I both really enjoyed it, and it was also not quite what I typically imagine a meatball sandwich to be. Usually I envision: heavy tomato sauce as the overriding flavour, hint of melted cheese... basic stuff. This one? Far, far heavier into the cheese equation, like dominatingly so. 

The tomato sauce is actually the weakest element here: there is a solid amount of it but it lacks anything especially notable about it. Not much sweetness or sting, not particularly hearty (fairly thin)... it's just sort of there as a well blended tomatoey texture. Totally fine (it isn't generic canned stuff is what I mean) but not memorable beyond being well made. 

Fortunately, this meatball sandwich holds some hidden aces. The bread is excellent: wonderfully soft, no stale segments front to back, and still firm enough not to let anything bleed into it as to make it soggy. This isn't a overtly saucy sub, true, but still a heavy one. Another positive: a parmesan presence alongside the melted provolone. That constant sharpness, mixed with a subtle creamy garlic kick here and there, adds so much to the enjoyment of this sub. There's a pesto spread in here as well, which also adds another nice flavour dimension to this. It's kind of like a nice meatball pasta dish, wherein somebody made all the noodles vanish and threw what's left into a freshly baked sub bun. I love a well balanced sandwich and I also love an adventure where every bite is a little bit different: the very best pizzas and burgers and sandwiches have this. 

The meatballs themselves... aren't meatballs kind of boring by themselves? It's really about the texture and a hint of taste within that sells them... when they're crusty on the outside and/or dry in the middle it's no good. 

These meatballs ain't that. Not super vivid as far as taste, but you get that necessary taste of juicy pork (their site mentions these have beef and veal also, but pork is the most noticeable) and some herbs... meanwhile the texture is incredibly on point. Soft all the way through, juicy without being oily or undercooked... and just enjoyable to take a big bite out of (they are huge too!). I'd gladly eat these with just some garlic toast on the side, very tasty. Really my singular complaint is: this sandwich definitely resides in Heartburn City. All that pork and heavy cheese... if you're like me and susceptible to such things, be warned. 

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Well, this is going to sound crazy... but despite Good Behaviour starting out as only an ice cream shop, going into review I had no intention of trying that. I'm not a dessert guy! I love ice cream (which proves yes, I am human and not a goblin in disguise) but honestly I buy some maybe twice a year. Indeed, reviewing this sub sandwich was going to be enough for me.

Until... as I was finishing this tasty sub on Good Behaviour's patio, on the other side of Gerrard I saw a family of six emerge from a car and all jaywalk (it was almost dicey) with considerable haste and go directly into Good Behaviour. Minutes later they all emerged with ice cream cones... and the most obvious idea at last struck me: "Gee I'm still here, I should probably check out the ice cream too." You know, the thing they're actually famous for...

 


 

So I did! First off, gimme a sugar or waffle cone all day. Cups are boring and safe. Second, Good Behaviour offer some pretty inspired flavours. I was oh so tempted to get the HK Milk Tea flavour, which I later learned is indeed one of their well known staples. Instead, this is their strawberry cheesecake.

I may not be a dessert person but this has very much been a strange development in my adult life. As a teenager? I'd go through tubs of cheap ice cream (those 4L No Name ones... not proud of it) and make root beer floats constantly... and so when I taste legitimately good, made-in-house ice cream it stands out to me that much more. This here is the real deal: that great taste of real cream and milk lingers in the mouth so long after each bite or lick or whatever.

Second: they absolutely nail both the strawberry and the cheesecake aspect of this. The strawberry isn't overpowering but its sharp sweetness is a consistent presence throughout, perfect for cutting into what would otherwise be one rich tasting scoop. That distinctive floaty cheesecake flavour runs throughout this as well, but the true strokes of genius are the chunks of graham cracker-like cake crust all over. Without them, it would be an enjoyable sweet cone... but with? Like two classic desserts merged together into something really exceptional. I really, really liked this... and enjoying it while walking down the vivid stretch of Gerrard East, after eating a satisfying sandwich, all on a pleasant Friday evening? That's the good stuff.

 

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Overall! Damn right I recommend checking out Good Behaviour. Very good sub sandwiches (not sure if all three locations offer them but I think so?) and even better ice cream. Keep in mind, I am no ice cream expert. Legitimately I've lived a few blocks from an Ed's Real Scoop for almost a decade, and have only been inside once about eight years ago just to drop off a resume (in my defense, the lineups for that place from May to September are ridiculous). However! I feel I'm a good judge of strong quality food in nearly all of its forms, and Good Behaviour definitely offers that in both sub and dessert form. Highly enjoyable. 

 

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Funky Jobs On The Run

I've worked a lot of various jobs in my adult life, the vast majority of them in bars/restaurants, and as such some of the extremely brief ones do stand out in my memory for something comedic and/or bizarre. Enjoy this new semi-short feature on the TT.

Friendly Thai (Leslieville)

Ah 2015. Fun summer to follow the Toronto Blue Jays, not a fun summer as far as securing a steady job.

I was still enrolled at University of Toronto at the time although my enthusiasm for studying English Lit was seriously waning... plus this was summertime, I had rent to pay and OSAP support wouldn't arrive until the fall. 

It would've been sometime in late June or very early July I saw a Craigslist posting that the Queens Head Pub, right at Leslie and Queen East, was hiring. At this point I had some limited bartending experience, so I applied, got called in for an interview at the pub with the then (or still? who knows) owner/manager, who was impressed enough to give me a trial shift. 

The thing was, he also ran the Thai restaurant next door, where the trial shift would be. "Just as a way of feeling out if you can handle things" was something along the lines of what he said. No problem. I show up at 5pm the next day ready to go... and nobody in this Thai restaurant has any clue whatsoever I was supposed to be shadowing or training, while the manager is nowhere to be found at either place. Seriously, I could've just been a random dude from the street wandering in and claiming I had a job here... it would've been the exact same kind of situation. 

Awkward as this is, I linger about and get shown around by the other servers. The restaurant, which is still there and not very large whatsoever (ten tables), is also completely dead. Not a soul comes inside the entire time. About an hour and a half into this (a ninety minute span that felt like nine hundred) I'm starting to think this just ain't happening... not only is this not at all the gig I thought I was applying for, but this is boring as hell and wasting my time for a place I'm essentially volunteering for. 

Must escape! So, I devise a (very obvious) lie that "Oh! I have to go umpire a softball game! Just remembered! Sorry gotta go!" I never signed any paperwork, filled out any forms and nor were any offered to me... I would not have been paid for this even had I stuck around longer than two hours. I got home just in time to see the Boston Red Sox completely obliterate Matt Boyd (there's the exact day, BbRef nerds!).

And that is surely the shortest job I've ever had, although it is pretty iffy whether or not it really qualifies. For the record, I hold no hard feelings towards the Queens Head. Solid pub with good wings that one of my softball teams likes to frequent after our games (sort of a strange irony how my weak-ass lie about umpiring softball got me out of the weirdness next door, and 2015 was well before I even played softball).    

Anyhow, I've got plenty of other odd stories about weird jobs I worked very briefly. Until the next edition...


 

Tuesday Tune

Outdoor concert season is upon us! Seeing as I saw this legendary artist just last night (with a direct view of the stage, no less... very cool) it's fitting the song of the week has to be one he performed during the brief acoustic section of the concert. Heck, here's even a (older) live version of it:




That's all for this week! Until the next one, stay cool, stay safe, and most of all don't spill that mustard.