The Fiftieth Tuesday Taste: Wendy's Breakfast

 

 

There's something strange going on tonight

There's something going on 

that's not quite right

Joey's nervous and his eyes are bright

There's something going on that's not quite right

 

 

Another Tuesday, another Taste! And a very special edition at that. 

Last February, finding myself bored, lonely and hungry in the middle of yet another endless lockdown, I made the bold, brilliantly heroic choice to try making a difference in people's lives. So gosh darnit... that's how I decided to start writing a weekly fast food review. Please, please... save the Nobel prizes for after your tears have dried up...

In all seriousness though, fifty episodes in now and this has really been a lot of fun to do (almost) every week. It's been a good motivation to go off and try some spots I may never have bothered to otherwise, while also re-enforcing my disinclination to eat at other particular places (*cough* McDonald's *cough*). As a 50th episode spectacular, we've got quite a bit to discuss (including a short little ranking later in the article of my personal favourites among the previous 49 editions of the TT) so lets not dawdle and instead jump into the main attraction: Wendy's breakfast menu.

Of the major fast food chains we have here in Canada, Wendy's was notably absent in offering any kind of breakfast item. I suppose Burger King still doesn't either, but who wants to even imagine what those eggs would taste like. Seeing the obvious potential of that direction later rather than never, about a month ago Wendy's wisely changed their tune and introduced these new breakfast items for their menu. Unwisely, they decided this menu should cease at 10:30am everyday. Woo. Hoo. So... in yet another chapter of the universe's attempts of nudging me to wake up way earlier than I like to... I hopped on my wheels and rode to the closest Wendy's (Leslie and Lakeshore Blvd)... catching their highly advertised yet elusive breakfast menu with twenty minutes to spare.

As a non-morning person (and semi-sleep deprived in this described moment) there was a bizarre feeling to seeing over a dozen cars circling around this Wendy's at 10am on a Sunday (it is also a Drive-Thru location). I am such a night owl that even walking around in the bright hours of AM makes me feel like a creature from another dimension... these smells and opposite directions of the sunlight exceedingly unfamiliar and strange. At least I was hungry though.

 

 

Starting off with their sausage and egg biscuit sandwich... it's nearly the exact same item Tim Horton's offers, only this one is larger and notably better. As mentioned when I reviewed the Tim's sandwich, I used to eat those things multiple times a week when I worked at the Friar and Firkin at Queen and John (there's a Tim Horton's next door). One thing of note during that review was how dry and crumbly their biscuits had become, and that their fake cheese slice was now too big for the sandwich... drooping into empty space in a state of unmelted sadness. This Wendy's version is a significant improvement over that: the cheese actually melts, the biscuit is softer and buttery, and the sausage patty much juicier. That patty itself is tasty also... somewhat peppery and plenty greasy (as one would expect) but also fresh tasting enough to lack any lingering staleness, 'previously frozen' numb aftertaste or tough exterior. 

The eggs are the weak link, sadly... not a whole lot of flavour and they're overcooked especially on the edges (you know when you slightly overcook a fried egg? It's like that, with a waxy, filmy circumference). Still, a pretty tasty sandwich... and I find the squareness of their patty (their burgers are also notoriously square don't forget) an amusing touch. 

Speaking of 'notorious', the second sandwich you see above is the breakfast iteration of the Baconator. This version replaces the two beef patties with a layer of egg and a sausage patty respectively, but leaves everything else (burger bun, cheese, mayo and an absurd amount of bacon) intact. Immediately after my first bite into this thing... I'm not sure I've ever wanted a vegetable more in my life. Similar to its older cousin, this sandwich is a lot... an overwhelming culinary and caloric experience. Each bite feels akin to a scoop of dirt out from the plot of your own grave. 

Flavour-wise... it's perfectly decent, obscenely heavy of course... but for an item so reliant on its bacon (it's in the damn name) I must say that Wendy's bacon is consistently chewy or brittle, always missing that crucial sweet spot. The egg is a complete after-thought in this sandwich, you hardly notice it's there beyond occasional texture (and it blends so seamlessly into the melted processed cheese you end up with something kind of plastic-like, tasteless and weird). There's just something off about this particular enterprise... it desperately needs some kind of crunch (the flaccid bacon ain't it) like lettuce or a sweet oozing tomato to make it resemble a Western style sandwich. As is, it's impressively indulgent and tastes agreeable (no stomach regrets afterward thankfully) but hasn't much beyond grease and texture so I doubt I'd ever order another one. 

 

 

Time for the surprise star of the show, saved for last because gotta end on a positive note for the 50th episode. These breakfast home-fries (or seasoned potatoes as said on their menu) are simply excellent. The kind of thing your best local greasy spoon has as a secret recipe hidden under the counter for. 

These aren't quite thick enough to be classified as potato wedges but are certainly shaped in that style. Impressively, they tip-toe those delicate balances between overseasoned/flavourless and dry/too oily... considering I arrived close to the end of their breakfast service just adds more points in their favour. The crispness is completely on point, the seasoning pepper indeed a heavy presence but nowhere to the point of overwhelming the tongue, and there's enough soft potato within to close the deal. A lot of enjoyable flavour here... certainly the taste of 'fried' but thankfully not caked into it, while those seasonings give it a nice little character. Whoever(s) conjured up their recipe knew what they were trying to emulate, and while I do think if served overcooked, unheated enough or having sat out a while these potatoes would be quite unpleasant... but on this occasion they were absolutely marvelous. If they offered these instead of their usual fries I'd legitimately go to Wendy's more. Absolutely great tasty stuff.   

Overall! As far as fast food breakfasts go... this would be a better one. I'd still prefer A&W's 'Sausage and Egger' over anything here, only because you can really taste the presence of the egg in that one... Wendy's swings and misses with their eggs in both items I tried. However, they get the sausage and the biscuits right (both are far more satisfying than anything Tim Horton's does), while the home-fries are an revelation. I wouldn't recommend the Breakfast Baconator (only because I want you to live a long life) but the rest is pretty solid for a fast food option. Worth a try.

 

Burnt Ends --- Honestly, a while back I wrote about 3000 words about the conclusion of Star Trek: Picard season 2 and am currently sitting on it until I can gather the fortitude to revisit that septic mess. It'll be shared soon... like an uncomfortable bowel movement I just have to release it and move on. 

On a significantly more pleasant note, I've also been writing about one of my very favourite bands... Spoon! They have ten albums now and I'm taking a look at all of them and doing a ranking so stay tuned for that very soon. Already finished the rough first draft. 

 

This Week's No Context Looney Tunes Image --

 

 

 

The Worst Tastes (So Far) -- Since we've now done fifty of these things, I thought it'd be fun to quickly rank my personal least favourite things I've reviewed. Call it a 'Bottom Three', if you will. Drumroll please!

3. Domino's Pizza --- I will never understand why almost everyone I know likes this stuff. Am I just doing it wrong? Overcooked every damn time, the sauce is generic and it is impossible to reheat to anything approaching respectability. 

2. KFC's Double Down --- A+ for the novelty, but KFC's chicken is just so absolutely awful and this was it at its stale, flavourless worst. Even cheese and bacon couldn't redeem this monstrosity. 

1. Country Style Breakfast Sandwich --- Quite likely the worst food thing I've ever spent money on. It was completely appalling how terrible this was... microwaved eggs! Dry chewy bagel! Unseasoned watery ham! Not a single positive element... a complete failure to even qualify as "food".

 

The Best Tastes (So Far) -- Enough badness, here are some of my favourites I've tried and reviewed for the show.

3. Blondies Pizza --- Really good, interesting pie... great quality and still delicious even when cold. Their black garlic dip meanwhile... absolutely next level stuff... an all-time sauce.

2. Dave's Hot Chicken --- I still miss the old Stratengers pub, but this is a worthy enough tenant in its place. Unique spice to this sandwich and very tasty cheese fries (although more cheese sauce please!).

1. Rudy --- Almost certainly on the short list of the best burgers Toronto has to offer. We might not have a Shake Shack location up here north of the border but at least we have something so spiritually inspired by that smash burger style. Darn good fries, too.

Election Week --- We've got a provincial election coming up here in Ontario, and while I've certainly used this space for political views on many occasions... this time I'm just going to tell ya to get out and let your democratic voice be heard! It's easy to be jaded by the world in which we live in, but casting a ballot for a world you want to see definitely can still make a difference. So get out and do it! It really doesn't take as long as people think.

Also, please just don't vote for that fuckface Doug Ford.

 

Playing Dumb --- Quick shoutout to my friend Peter Fulton and his book 'Dumb Luck', which is a collection of re-told true stories from his life and adventures across the globe. I've read a solid chunk of it (and have heard many of these crazy tales from his own mouth) and definitely can vouch for it being as wild as advertised. I think he's got a page on FB for it and definitely an Instagram, where he's sharing photos from the stories in the book, so search for that and check it out!

 

Tuesday Tune --  Last week I mentioned I'd only started listening to Pavement a few months ago. Well! Here's a band I only heard for the first time this past weekend... though it is a record that I'm sure influenced later bands like Blur, Arctic Monkeys and many, many others. Here's a good tune from their debut.

 

 

 

That's it for me this week! Whether you've been reading since the very first one last February, or this is the first time you've checked out the TT... thanks for reading and here's to hopefully fifty more! Until then, though... be safe, be healthy, stay sharp and don't spill that mustard.