The Tuesday Taste - A Breakfast Fit For a (Burger) King

 

 

The snipers are passed out

in the bushes again

I'm glad I got my suit dry-cleaned

before the riots started

'Cause there's only rehashed faces

on the bread line tonight

Soon you'll be a figment

of some infamous life 

 

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste. 

This week we resume the epic* exploration into various fast food breakfasts by entering a regal realm. Everybody get your paper crowns on, Jughead style... that's right we're coming for the king and we best aren't missing.

(*there is obviously nothing epic about this beyond the amount of calories my body has been subjected to)

 

 

(Uh Burger King? I think Blink 182 would like a word)

 

We've reviewed Burger King twice before in the earlier incarnations of the Tuesday show: a lacklustre Whopper and a dreadful "fish" sandwich... yet in neither of those reviews is any mention of Burger King's history and how they came about to be. Hey, seeing as this may likely be the last time I ever review BK (or possibly even step inside of one physically)... seems a perfect opportunity to dust off the ol' Wikiped-I-mean-"textbook" pages and take another trip into the past.     

--

'Tis a tale of majestic conquest! Kingdom shaking betrayals! Political intrigue and warfare involving dozens of the bravest armadas the world has ever seen! Wait, that's my miniseries pitch, wrong notes... ah here we go. The glorious empire christened King of Burger began in the early 1950s as... Insta-Burger King? Why does that make me think of something you'd probably see on the Jetsons? Apparently named for a special oven called the Insta-Broiler, which... kind of creatively clunky but whatever lets go with it. 

Ah yes... this royal domain of broiled beef slabs was born from the fertile soil of a timeless land named... Jacksonville, Florida. That's right, nothing brings to mind hamburger royalty (and jaguars) like a moderately sized metropolitan area in northeastern Florida.   

Right. Um... lets see... ah ha! An overthrow of the kingdom! This should finally get good. What wicked dark art sorcery caused such an uprising? Surely it must've been treachery the likes of which even a Maleficent couldn't... oh, the company was failing and so was bought out by a pair of franchisees from Miami, who immediately simplified the name to Burger King. Fair points to them on that move, it's not like anything beginning with "Insta" could ever become popular...

Since then, ownership of Burger King has been passed between far too many corporate entities to be even slightly interesting. Yeah sorry everybody... as far as dramatic re-tellings of thrones and kingdoms go this is about as exciting as filing a tax return. It's never a good sign when you Google "Burger King stories" and the majority of the hits are horror tales either of working or eating there. At least they got a cool crown out of it.

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Burger King locations here in Canada stop serving breakfast at 10:30, so I had to hustle it up to Danforth and Victoria Park before that cutoff. 

Looking over their menu, I admit there were some eye-catching options that I knew I'd have to sample for this review. As such (in the lead photo you see above) we've got a sausage and egg Croissan'wich (hilarious name), a fried chicken English Muffin thing, a hash brown poutine (for real) and a small helping of their French Toast Sticks. My heart was beating fast with anticipation! And... also beating fast afterwards because yikes. This combination of food has to be one of the least healthiest things I've ever ordered from anywhere in my life.

 

           

Might as well start with the greatest monstrosity featured here, that hash brown poutine. In my defense I ordered this only because of the gimmick, not because I expected it would be any good. And yeah, prediction satisfied: it certainly is not any good. 

The concept doesn't work. Or at least, it can't work when the level of quality is this low. Think of what makes a tasty hash brown: a nice fried crunch with some soft flaky diced potato within. Problem is when you smother something crispy like that in hot gravy... it tends to lose most or all of that valuable crispiness. So yeah... what you've got here are a lot of shredded bits of potato falling apart and swimming in gravy soup (you can barely even scoop them) thus making the novelty wear about as thin as the hash browns themselves. 

Maybe this could've worked if the hash browns were larger, firmer, crunchier (or just better) rather than these very under-fried frozen-tasting little bite sized discs here that never stood a chance. I've seen places that offer tater tot poutines (apparently to high regard) and the general concept is the same, so it can be done. 

Even so, this BK offering isn't a particularly pleasant gravy to deal with either. There's a sugary sweetness to it that I am simply not fond of whatsoever, plus that weak thinness of flavour common among powdered gravies. Obviously these are problems since this dish is drowning in the stuff. 

This is all bad. Very bad. However, I'll give a morsel of credit to BK for using actual cheese curds here. They aren't amazing cheese curds (not much squeakiness) but the taste at least resembles the genuine article and is far better than anything else in this thing. Beyond that, not a good omen when the person serving you a poutine asks if you'd like ketchup with it. Ketchup and gravy go together about as well as whiskey and cotton candy. 

 

            

Here's their Chicken English Muffin, to which I have to ask: how is this a breakfast item? Because it's on an English Muffin? 

Whatever. Breakfast or no, in the realm of chicken sandwiches this is at the "staring at a blank wall and flicking your boogers" position on the imagination spectrum. It's just breaded chicken, processed cheese and mayo. Exciting. Even Burger King thinks this thing is so boring that they legit spread mayonnaisse on both buns, look:

 

 

In high school I had a strange friend who would eat mayo sandwiches, like just toasted bread and mayo with nothing else. I recall making him one of these once and recoiling in horror as he chomped away happily at it. This sandwich here is a tiny notch more interesting than that. 

Oh, what do I think of the breaded chicken, since it's the same kind BK uses for their chicken sandwiches? I'm not at all a fan. It's quite peppery, like a ton of ground black pepper which I don't mind... but the minced and heavily manufactured texture within turns my stomach and frankly this thing barely tastes like chicken at all. I don't know what exactly it tastes like (beyond dry) but it sure as hell ain't that. Assuming there is egg product in the English Muffin, there might be more bird in there than the actual meat. 

As for the muffin itself... very under-toasted and semi-stiff in places. Combining all these textures (chewy bland muffin, mysterious "chicken" patty, processed cheese and several splats of mayo) gives you something extremely unappealing. Even if you paid me to eat one of these... well I probably still do but would actually have think about it for a moment. Set a course for "uninspired" Mr. Sulu, Warp Factor Blech.   

 

 

Well the good news is that it doesn't get any worse (considering how awful those first two items were I'd be genuinely impressed if they managed that dumpster-esque feat). This here is the Sausage and Egg Croissan'wich (still a hilarious name) and while I wouldn't venture nearly far enough to say it's at all good, this at least delivers the layers that its title suggests.

The croissant definitely has the softness you'd want it to have, plus a pleasant faint buttery aftertaste. On a surface-level, entirely decent as the bread portion of this sandwich. Of course, here comes the inevitable 'but'. But (hey told ya)... this is suspiciously soft. Think of a freshly baked croissant (a happy thought indeed) with its little oily slivers of it flaking off and coating to your fingers, plus those harder parts on either end... this Croissan'wich doesn't have any of those important touches. 

There is an illusion of freshness that fades with every bite, leaving none of it feeling all that authentic. Hey, for a super duper fast food chain this is entirely acceptable... it's when you compare it with some of the other really good breakfast sandwiches we've recently reviewed that these faults become much more noticeable. 

Speaking of faults... the rest of this sandwich! These are some bland-ass eggs... woefully unseasoned (not even pepper) and you barely even get any kind of classic eggy-flavour. This damn thing is so much just texture without substance. The sausage patty at least gives a kick of juiciness and is okay I suppose, though it's taste likewise is fleeting. This is on the Tim Horton's level of flat flavours that your tongue barely even registers: I've eaten plain crackers that had more zing than this sandwich.

 

           

Saving the best for last... French Toast Sticks! Much like the hash brown poutine, the novelty of this particular item compelled me to try it. Unlike that sorry "poutine" (I think Quebec would try to separate again if they learned of this travesty) as a little sweet snack these actually work.  

Like, it honestly wasn't bad! I also appreciate the side Table syrup dip not trying to masquerade as actual maple syrup via some kind of "maple flavoured" thing... so a point for transparency there. 

Anyhow, these French Toast sticks combine texture and flavour in way nothing else I tried here at BK did whatsoever. There's a nice egg-bread filling within the sticks (tasting more of egg than their actual eggs on the freaking sandwich did) good doughy crispiness on the outside (with some tiny bits of crystal sugar along there) and a solid hint of cinnamon (even if artificial) on the aftertaste. 

All nice touches! You can even see the crust outline of the bread loaf on these sticks as well, with those bites giving a slightly more bitter taste of darker bread crust. 

 

 

Dare I say... an entirely decent snack. I enjoyed eating these even without the table syrup (which out of flavour boredom I dunked the Croissan'wich into... which actually kinda helped it, seriously). Good textures, enjoyably crispy and that fading bit of cinnamon is a fine finishing touch. Tastes almost (almost) like a real baked good dessert, even. 

 

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Overall. Yeah... definitely not a breakfast worth waking up early for. Hit that 'Snooze' button as many times as you like on this one. Maximum blech. 

The surprise tastiness and sneaky flavour depth of the French Toast sticks save this from being a completely awful culinary experience... and I suppose the Croissan'wich is a passable option if you're hungry in a pinch (it's barely mediocre but I've encountered worse). Aside from that... ouch. I'd take McDonald's offerings almost happily over whatever the hell that Chicken English muffin was trying to do. Meanwhile, that hash brown poutine is such an ill-conceived and poorly executed mess I even tried to see if I could salvage it at home somehow (more on that in a moment).

Unless you're taking somebody out for breakfast whom you really don't like... I would not at all recommend Burger King here. Not the among the absolute worst food I've reviewed but it's a postal code within shouting distance. Just so, so bland and processed tasting that it made me want to eat salads for a week. You can do (and deserve) much better.      

 

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The Hash Brown Poutine Resuscitation Ward

Considering I intended to breathe normally the rest of the day, I did not eat everything featured in this review in one sitting. The hash brown poutine especially: it was such a negative experience after a few bites I needed something (anything) else to get that sensation out of my mouth.  

Arriving home with this now cold, gravy filled cheesy chunks of flaked potato dish something... I wondered how best to reheat this thing. In the past I've successfully salvaged cold poutines with a frying pan on low heat (just a bit of butter to help it along) and so tried the same thing here.

 

Yeah this didn't work at all, also making my pan a real chore to scrub clean afterward. That stupid crappy-ass gravy again: oozing all over and making the remaining bits of hash brown even soggier while I'm trying to re-fry them! Truly this is a concoction more fitting of a high number on the Periodic Table than for human consumption. 

Plan B: the toaster oven. It wouldn't help much with making this thing crispy but at this point I'm not sure even a blowtorch could do that. 

The result? Something not quite hash browns, not quite cheesy gravy filled mashed potatoes, some kind of inhuman hybrid between. The cheesier bites definitely had some taste utility, but the rest was approaching Krusty Brand Imitation Gruel in the flavour department.

Conclusion! Yeah there was simply no saving this thing. It was entirely edible after that trip through the toaster oven, sure... but that flat flavour is just unshakable. I chopped up some green onions which instantly became by far the most interesting aspect of this. 

 

 

One Hundred and Twenty 

While the number 120 has numerous* (pardon the pun) religious associations, for my purposes here I like it more as a nice round (quasi-flimsy) anniversary. Seeing as next week will be the 120th Tuesday review... well I've got something quite fun planned that I've been gradually working towards the past little while. So look out for that! Spoiler: it's going to be a list. 

(*120 is also a pretty good score in a round of dart throwing, although nailing two triple twenties while then also missing the board entirely... feels like an accurate analogy for these reviews...)     

 

Unfamiliar Laundry

In the "remember some guys" category is this neat highlight video showing a bunch of familiar MLB players appearing in uniforms you most certainly don't associate with them, with every team getting one guy. Jim Thome as a Dodger? Nomar in Oakland? Tim Lincecum... Angel? All weird stuff. (Here's hoping in ten years we're not getting an updated one of these featuring Max Scherzer in Blue Jay blue). 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday Tune

Maybe not his best album but probably his most fun. Beck goes straight into campy, horny, dancey sleaze and it's a wild nonsense party of course. 

 

 

That's it for another week! Once again we've got something quite fun planned for next Tuesday but until then... stay safe, stay warm and don't spill that mustard. 

 

The Tuesday Taste - Philthy Philly's

 

 

My brain is working overtime

I need something to ease my mind

And as my thoughts go manic

I really start to panic

There's no place

to hide behind

 

Another Tuesday, another Taste. 

I'm kind of in a bad mood on the Friday I write this (okay scratch that "kind of") what with the current shitshow we call existing and thinking in 2025 (emphasis on "thinking" there). Fittingly, this week we're bringing in some filth. 

Wait, that's not quite right... obey me, spell checker! Okay, what we're actually bringing is "philth" which I presume is a term for an unkempt dude named Phil? Or maybe, similarly, I know a guy named Phil who has a dirty mind... is there some kind of secret unspeakable ingredient going on here? Surely I'm the first person to ever make these such brilliant jokes.

Now that I've ruined everyone's appetites for a fortnight, lets talk about Philthy Philly's. Geez, what a tongue-twister of a name. Was Seychelle's Sea Shore Sea Shells Chalet already taken? Say Philthy Philly's ten times really fast and you'll be a Daffy Duck impersonator in no time. A sour candy would probably help you speak semi-normally again after that. 

My customary glance of research shows that Philthy Philly's started up in Newmarket (that's just north of Toronto for you non GTA-knowers) sometime in 2013 as a family run eatery... expanding to dozens of locations all across Canada (though mostly in Southern Ontario) in the decade since. 

 

 

You likely can ascertain that this is a restaurant specializing in a specific Philadelphia dish: the vaunted Philly Cheesesteak. They do offer a variety of other options like burgers and poutines but the headline item naturally is that cheesesteak (Philly is in their freaking name after all). 

Admittedly this is a sandwich I have the barest bones of experience with. I've never even been to Philadelphia (I like the Phillies though) and from what I've seen there is considerable debate on what constitutes an authentic Philly Cheesesteak. Checking a Philadelphia Reddit thread on the subject, consensus seems to be that the steak (ribeye ideally) must be thinly shaved, the bread be a hoagie roll and the cheese either a Cheese Whiz-like spread or a provolone if you're feeling fancy. Additions like onions, peppers and mushrooms are acceptable if that's your preference... but when it comes to sauces like mayo or ketchup, for some that crosses the line into becoming something else entirely.             

I'd love to dive into the origins of the sandwich itself (it does indeed trace back to Philadelphia if you're curious) but these two articles (especially the oral history one) do a fine job of doing just that (pretty funny to think how a Philly Cheesesteak was born initially as a hot dog substitute). 

Instead, we're going back to Port Credit (previously visited in the Rosie's review) to try this Canadian take on a famed Pennsylvanian item. I get paid by the geographical reference don't you know*.

(*just kidding. I don't get paid)

 

 

The inside of this place is definitely... orange... while extremely sharp and clean in spite of the moniker. Again, more evidence for my "filthy mind" theory... 

Of course I had to get a cheesesteak (duh)... but seeing as the sign on this Port Credit location read "Cheesesteaks and Poutinerie" well who am I to break up such a pairing. 

 

           

There truly was no shortage of poutine variations to choose from, ranging from pulled pork ones to a creation featuring perogies. While Philthy Philly's is a franchise, apparently they allow their franchisees to modify (with corporate approval) their menus somewhat, resulting in for example their Stockyards location possibly offering different poutines than the Port Credit one. 

Regardless of that, this here is their "O-Ring" with your standard gravy and curds, some peppery squares of thin bacon and the fried onion hula hoops obstructing the view of anything else in this dish. Hang on a second here...

 

 

That's more like it. Getting those rings out the way, they're entirely decent as far as deep fried onion circles go. Honestly like almost any other onion ring you've ever had in your life... very oily, okay crunch, fairly hollow inside (not a thick batter) and not overly oniony. Ground floor textbook this is the picture in the dictionary kind of stuff. It's so in that precise spot of average that I can't provide anything more of interest about it.

As for the poutine... yeah it's likewise not all that remarkable in either direction. There are plenty of ferociously unpleasant poutines you can find in Toronto... such a search will not take long, trust me! This Philthy Philly's one here is well above anything like that sure, yet it lacks any notable character or memorable flair to it. 

Much like a poutine you'd get at a moderately priced diner: a slightly salty beef gravy made more for mashed potatoes than fries, real cheese curds that melt nicely but lack any plump squeakiness, all on top of quality french fries (the strongest element here) that have some floppy softness (but not sogginess), taste like genuinely unfrozen potatoes and are entirely fine. Not a lot of crispiness, but that real potato taste makes up for that. I want to say they were fried in a type of oil you don't commonly find in fast food joints: there was a hint of something familiar and unusual. 

Keep in mind I'm a bit of a poutine snob: I've been to Montreal enough times to know how this is really done, leaving the vast majority of poutines I've had outside of Quebec between the range of slightly disappointing to crimes against the very concept of poutine itself. To me, this Philthy Philly's poutine is a little below average overall, meaning that among GTA options it's probably a bit above average. Make sense? No? Bah!

Well... I didn't love it but I didn't hate it either. Hit the spot but nothing to text home about. Enjoyable to eat start to finish, good balance of the gravy and cheese-to-fries ratio, pretty standard poutininess. I'm desperately trying to explain how pretty okay this was without insulting it.            

 

 

At long last, it's cheesesteak time. This photo, showcasing how rather flat this sandwich is, does a terrible job showing anything inside that isn't the shaved steak. Hang on, clearly my photographer was out to lunch (figuratively and literally). Here we go again...

 

 

Not the most elegant picture but at least you get a better idea of what we're dealing with here. Plus seeing as we're talking about (an authentic attempt at) Philly Cheesesteak here... I don't think being overly elegant is going to be any kind of problem.

I suppose this, with the green peppers and mushrooms, has more stuff than the standard composition. Meh... I honestly just went with what Philthy Philly's called their "classic" and braced myself for whatever came next. The result being... when you consider the relative simplicity the Philadelphia ones pride themselves on (so much of its widespread charm appears to be that very thing) this version likely goes a bit too far with extra stuff to be deemed a true authentic re-creation.

I'll still evaluate it for what it is, which is a pretty alright/good steak sandwich with a couple odd flavours in here. The cheese flavour is indeed Cheese Whiz-like (if not the actual article) and while personally I've never at all liked the stuff... I can see how this works in theory, with that gloopy fake cheese flavour seeping into the thinly sliced bits of fried steak. 

Frankly I think what really helps this work are those green peppers and onions complimenting that cheese goo and greasy beef duo. The hint of bitterness from the peppers and light sweetness from the fried onions cut through that intense heaviness and give this sandwich a more complete flavour, rather than the taste of sheer grease and guilt you'd be left with without them. They also made this thing smell quite appealing, which doesn't hurt either. 

The mushrooms aren't much of a factor though the texture is nice, while the bun (or roll if you prefer) is generally soft with some manageable stiffness along the edges (Philthy's proudly claim they import their bread from Amoroso's Baking Company based in Philadelphia, so points on the authentic effort there). 

As for the steak itself... I do like how the thin shavings make the texture quite enjoyable even for a well cooked steak (which I normally do not prefer) while the flavour indeed reminded me somewhat of beef ribs, that kind of subtle fattiness. 

However, the sandwich does have a strong sense of artificial flavour to it that I can't ignore. Maybe it's the fake cheese product skewing my perspective but each bite of the steak tasting nearly the same? Well, it makes my thoughts drift towards suspecting the mass-produced nature of this particular beef. That's not a complete deal-breaker just an observation. 

The oddest flavour though is a strange sweet brown sauce they put on this thing (you can see it in the open faced photo) like an oniony tangy BBQ sauce that is just noticeable enough to make you wonder why this is on here. They were worried the sandwich was too dry and needed another sauce? Whatever the reasoning it doesn't work in here at all: there's already a lot going on and you don't need the extra sweetness (especially something leaning into sugary sweet) and the tang clashes with the more nuanced veggies on here. Bizarre. 

 

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Overall... honestly this is a really tough one. I'm leaning more towards not recommending them just because how average and mostly forgettable this was. Nothing outstanding but also nothing that offended any taste buds either. An acceptable poutine and an acceptably greasy cheesesteak sandwich that I do think tries its best with what it's got to work with.

As a chain this feels a lot like a "hey there's a daily special" or "I have a coupon/gift card, I'll get something because I'm hungry and I know it'll be decent" type of situation. For comparison's sake, I've had a Tim Horton's gift card (won at a baseball banquet) for nearly six months now and I still have not been compelled enough to even activate it for Tim's food... even though it would essentially be free. Philthy Philly's is definitely comfortably above that level.

It's also entirely possible I'm simply not a huge fan of Philly Cheesesteak, seeing as the Jersey Mike's version didn't blow me away either. Entirely possible I've simply never had a truly good one... or it's just not my thing. The jury is still deliberating. I guess... if you're really craving this type of classic sandwich... Philthy Philly's is a fine enough option. I'm personally not in a huge hurry to go back anytime soon, but I wouldn't forever dismiss the possibility either.                   

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Burnt Ends

Pizza review! I went to Leaside and tried a really good spot. Read about it here. 

Oh, and my musician alter ego (yes I have a life beyond reviewing food you know) released a music video for a new song or something. Look up mixdmetaphors on IG and check it out.

Tuesday Tune

Seems a good place to announce my Weezer project! It's nothing crazy, just another discography ranking and hoo boy there aren't many other bands that are as much a doozy on that front as those guys. The ups and downs are like watching one of those heartbeat machines they have in hospitals.

Stay tuned for that soon! In the meantime, here's one of Rivers Cuomo's solo tunes that really would've helped any of those, um, 'very less good' Weezer records. 

 

 

That's all for another week! We'll be back next Tuesday as usual, unless these weekly reviews somehow fall under some kind of tariff (hey if the USA is taxing barren Antarctic islands populated entirely by penguins, who the f*k knows what's possible anymore).

Until then, stay safe, stay warm or cool and don't spill that mustard. 

This Week In Pizza: La Casetta

 

 

When I write these reviews I have a regular habit of researching the backstory of the restaurant (or fast food chain in the case of the Tuesday reviews) after I've already tried the food and compartmentalized my opinions and conclusions on it. In a way this is like doing things backwards I suppose, but it helps me approach these places with a (mostly) unbiased perspective. Finding out after the fact about a "rising from the ashes" or "overcoming a global pandemic" story doesn't change the taste of the food sure, but it does add some colour and flourish to the tale these businesses have lived. 

In the case of La Casetta, this "low-knowledge" approach was especially wise, lest my expectations be severely affected otherwise. See, I thought this was simply a well reviewed, potential hidden gem off the well-worn paths in Leaside... but I learned after my visit there's a fair bit more. You see, much like my Tulia Osteria story, we've got another case of a chef/owner being somebody I worked with in the past. Yep, Chef Mathan Rajaratnam and I crossed paths well over a decade ago at Pizzeria Libretto Ossington (he was the lead pizzaiolo back then and really knew his stuff, which should not be any surprise). 

If that were all, then I'd have chuckled at the cliche coincidence of "small world" and carried on as I normally do when trying new pizza. Thing is, this isn't Chef Mathan and Chef Giovanni Sarra's rookie restaurant venture either: the duo in fact also own and operate Oro Di Napoli in Mimico, Cafe Di Oro in downtown Toronto and a place I even wrote about last autumn in Pizzeria Via Napoli near Islington station! In a bizarre quirk, all four restaurants even use the exact same template for their websites (yet don't boldly mention the existence of the others). 

Hey, seriously good for them... I'm just saying for me it's a good thing I didn't know this until after the fact because I've tried those other places and greatly enjoyed them (Oro Di Napoli is probably still in my Top 15 for all of Toronto). Knowing La Casetta was a part of this would've both seriously raised my expectations and made comparisons between these places inevitable in that moment of sampling it. I'm only human after all... once you are aware of a fact it's impossible to simply flip a switch and turn that information off in your mind. Maybe with enough alcohol... but I'm not endorsing that kind of behavior (any more at least).    

Okay! With another classic long ramble out of the way... La Casetta is an cozy Italian restaurant tucked away in a mini plaza on Millwood Road, a location askew by the very winding streets of residential Leaside. They've been open since mid-2022, with Chef Mathan and his wife jumping at the opportunity to open a restaurant so close to their Leaside home. Since that opening they've become that hidden neighbourhood gem I mentioned, known only to locals and crazy adventurous pizza maniacs (not that you know any of those, nope). Coincidentally, La Casetta happens to be across the street from an old school pie joint Bravo Pizza (still there!) one of the very first places I ever tried when undertaking this Endless Pizza Quest(TM) back in autumn of 2018.  

The inside of La Casetta reminds somewhat of a French cafe: a nice mix of wooden decor and white tiles, with some quirky and elegant decorations throughout. Artsy and chic without being pretentious or unwelcoming. 

I was torn between their Diavola pizza and their Casareccia, which in retrospect it's a damn good thing I went for the Diavola because the Casareccia is the exact same pizza (topping for topping) I tried at Via Napoli several months earlier. Could've made for an interesting comparison I suppose... see how similar my observations and eventual grades were... but yeah I'd prefer not to repeat myself. 

Coincidentally, La Casetta happens to be across the street from an old school pie joint Bravo Pizza (still there!) one of the very first places I ever tried when undertaking this Endless Pizza Quest(TM) back in autumn of 2018. The inside reminds somewhat of a French cafe: a nice mix of wooden decor and white tiles, with some quirky and elegant decorations throughout. Artsy and chic without being pretentious or unwelcoming. 

I was torn between their Diavola pizza and their Casareccia, which in retrospect it's a damn good thing I went for the Diavola because the Casareccia is the exact same pizza (topping for topping) I tried at Via Napoli several months earlier. Could've made for an interesting comparison I suppose... see how similar my observations and eventual grades were... but yeah I'd prefer not to repeat myself.

 

 

Here is that Diavola! (which as I've said in previous reviews a few times essentially means "devil's pizza" because of the spice). Normally this version from La Cassetta comes with kalamata olives but I axed that since I don't like olives, but also this particular pizza (in my opinion) doesn't really need that bitterness and salty taste obstructing the fantastic flavours going on here.

Yeah, this pizza was fabulous. Sans olives what you've got left is thinly sliced spicy soppressata, basil, fior di latte, classic San Marzano tomato sauce (a fixture of many Neapolitan pizzerias) and that vivid orange drizzling is an in-house bomba sauce.

Starting with that bomba sauce... truly the secret weapon of this pizza. While bomba often has more of a spreadable consistency (like a pesto or a paste) than a thicker liquid one, this La Casetta recipe is a bit creamier and lighter... reminding me of a punchier type of vodka sauce in some ways. You get a lot of spicy red pepper heat to it, a gentle sting that blends into that slightly creamy texture quite nicely. There is indeed considerable punch but never does it totally overwhelm... settling nicely in the back of the mouth instead like a quality rhythm section. Excellent stuff. 

 

         

The rest of the pizza is more straightforward: salami, cheese, basil and sauce... but that doesn't mean it is undeserving of praise. That San Marzano tomato sauce is a necessity for so many top notch pizzerias with good reason: the slightly sweet, the tiniest hint of acidity and full lasting flavour of it just gives a pie such an excellent foundation to work from. 

We've got great fior di latte as well, soft and squishy to the touch and on each bite... plus a very subtle smattering of shredded grana padano. Meanwhile, the leaves of basil are baked enough for their leafy flavour to seep into the pizza but not too much to be overly charred and bitter. That vivid fresh taste is especially nice here next to the heavier and spicier elements. 

The soppressata... precisely thin, not a lot of that salty or fatty pork taste at all, and it itself has a considerable heat to it that hits the middle of the tongue (rather than the bomba sauce which sizzles all over). 

If there's any weakness here... it's that the crust is merely okay. A bit dry, hollow and crunchy, with a slight cornmeal dusting to it... again it's entirely fine but rather boring in comparison to the orchestra of spice and flavours happening on the rest of this pizza. 

 

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Overall! Simply an excellent take on a Diavola pizza, executed with skill and expert precision. Having that creamy bomba sauce on this thing elevates an already good pie into a spectacular one, really the key difference between the grade I gave Pizzeria Via Napoli and what I'm going to give La Casetta. 

In the back of my mind, considering some of the identical pizza offerings on the menus of all four of these restaurants... it's hard to shake the sense I'm comparing a bunch of completely similar pizzas against each other. All wood burning ovens, all menus with minimal deviations conceived by the same chefs... am I tripping over myself by retreading the same ground? Maybe. Probably.

Nevertheless, an incredibly damn good pizza is an incredibly damn good pizza. La Casetta is much closer to the Oro Di Napoli level than Via Napoli... this was an absolute delight to try something so delicious and flawlessly done (it even reheats in the pan extremely well!). I have to give them at minimum an "A--", placing them deservedly in the true upper echelon of Toronto pizzas. 

Despite the ties and connection with those other (perhaps better known) pizzerias, La Casetta still manages to feel like a true Leaside hidden gem that I highly recommend checking out if you can.      

          

The Tuesday Taste - McDonald's Breakfast

 

 

Oh, can it be?

The voices calling me

They get lost

and out of time

I should've seen it glow

but everybody knows

That a broken heart

is blind

   

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste. Hoo boy... we're doing this freaking place again? Seriously? Haven't I suffered enough?

 

If you've been following the Tuesday reviews since the early days (oh 2021, such an innocent time) you'll know I have a very torturous history with the golden arches. Even in my formative fast food years I just never cared for McDonald's at all... I loved Burger King (Whoppers were actually good back then, probably) and eventually Harvey's and A&W. Yet, for whatever reason, teenage me never latched onto the appeal of ol Micky D's... not even the fries or the chicken sandwiches. 

Fast forward to present day, as a jaded and pretentious food-reviewing adult... I haven't been exactly coy with my thoughts on McDonald's food on this here webzone. The Big Mac? Dry and stale with a weird artificial aftertaste. Quarter Pounder? Flavourless but at least it was small. A McChicken? I wondered whether that patty had ever even been in the proximity of an actual chicken. The McRib? Surprisingly not awful, although mostly bland and one dimensional. The fries? Like oily sticks of salty potato-facsimile product.

So yeah, needless to say over the course of four years and 115+ of these Tuesday food reviews I've given McDonald's plenty of chances... with the results being completely antithetical to swaying over my affection. I thought I was done with McD's! All the bases covered! Two different burgers and their chicken option, even their famous limited edition novelty sandwich that the freaking Simpsons parodied... and we're out! Never again do I have to sample this chemical impersonation of food again, right? 

Nope. Over the course of recently trying all these local breakfast sandwiches like Egg Club or Bagels On Fire, it occurred to my brain that some of the enormous fast food chains also offer breakfast items, McDonald's chief among those. Damn you, brain! 

Sigh. That is how, on a sunny and semi-frosty spring morning, I rode off to the nearest golden arches and caught their famous breakfast menu with ten minutes to spare. I've read online that some locations do the breakfast menu all day, but the specific knowledge of which ones is several galaxies away from my particular jurisdiction. Also, can't believe everything you read on the internet am I right??? Um, except these reviews, of course.

 

             

Okay I admit, imprinting the 'M' logo into the top of a sandwich has a uniquely tacky charm to it. 

The lead photo of this piece shows the three items I sampled: one hash brown, a bacon and egg McMuffin and finally a sausage and egg McGriddle (the branded bun you see above). They other a small legion of other breakfast items too, I know... but seriously I wasn't going to try every single damn one now, was I. Especially when you consider how most of these options are essentially the same three things only with different starchy packaging (english muffin, bagel, tortilla etc). 

Also more importantly, I flat out refuse to ever review a wrap from any fast food place. It's a freaking wrap... like come on, what am I gonna say about it? "Uhhhh yeah! This tortilla is definitely... tortilla-like." Now before you hurl husks of corn at me through your screens, I'm not including shawarmas or burritos and the like in that. Those usually have way more to them in terms of preparation, the overall composition of it and the ingredients inside... a McDonald's breakfast wrap is just swapping the bun thing for a tortilla thing. No thanks. 

 

        

Come for the rants, stay for the foods! This is the sausage and egg McGriddle and I'll admit to previously never having any kind of McGriddle before. I didn't even know what a McGriddle was, frankly... all I knew going in was it would probably be pretty fun to type McGriddle as many times as McPossible. 

I was quite surprised upon my first bite: my expectation for the bun had been some kind of buttery, french toast-like thing that would likely be stale on the edges. Instead... soft and almost wet-spongey... like a pancake drenched in syrup to the point it seeps in, that kind of squishy texture. The flavour is definitely trying to resemble that description: there is a pancake/maple syrupy hint throughout, fairly artificial tasting as it may be. 

Still, having never tried anything quite like this before... I was genuinely intrigued by it. This was kind of like eating a little plate of pancakes with invisible syrup, egg and sausage, only in sandwich form (and without the stickiness). The sausage patty itself is for sure on the greasier side but also fairly juicy and not tasting of gross old grill. Meanwhile, eggs formed into the shape of a perfect puck always throws me off (yeah yeah it's because of a special cooking contraption they have and they do use real eggs)... so this isn't a sandwich I'd want to make a regular habit of. 

Nevertheless... I actually kind of enjoyed this one! The egg does have a good eggy taste (very descriptive I know) and there's solid balance between the greasy sausage and the melted processed cheese. Combined with the strange charm of the fake-syrup pancake buns, this is easily the best and most interesting thing I've ever reviewed at a McDonald's. I would willingly eat this again. And my heart grew seven sizes that day... (along with my belt).           

The Egg McMuffin is of course a classic, I don't need to explain that one. But I will anyway! 

The invention of the Egg McMuffin dates back to the late 1960s/early 1970s, when numerous McDonald's franchisees were experimenting with various breakfast-on-the-go concepts. Herb Peterson was the operator of multiple McDonald's locations in California, and with his background in advertising had done some work for the company in that capacity as well. Seeing the potential in this yet untapped fast breakfast market, in 1972 he tested out a sandwich made to resemble an eggs benedict. The rest is history, of course.

That back story is interesting, to me anyway, because until now I'd never connected the dots on how similar this is to a classic eggs benny. I mean, you've got the English Muffin, the ham/bacon, the bouncy texture of the egg is quite similar to the whites of a poached egg... you're really just missing the delicious runny yoke (although that wouldn't really work for an on-the-go sandwich) and the rich thick creaminess of a Hollandaise sauce, to which the slice of processed cheese is a (lacking) substitute for. 

Alas, those missing parts are pretty darn crucial aspects of a good eggs benedict. Without them? Well, you've got an Egg McMuffin... and left like this it's a pretty bland affair. This is the kind of sandwich you can spruce up at home with some lettuce or hot sauces or mayo... all those would spark some life into this and make it pretty tasty... but no bonus points for that obviously, we have to review it as they serve it. 

All you really taste is egg. The English Muffin has some decent toasted crunch to it, whereas the bacon is hardly any factor in here whatsoever. It's cooked to within an millimetre of its life while its flavour has already passed onward into another plane of existence. Crumbly and tasteless, such a sadness for bacon to end up this way. 

Still, even substituting the juicier and livelier sausage patty for the bacon would only make this whole thing slightly better. This sandwich is screaming out for some kind of sauce or anything with some zing, and while I don't expect McDonald's to bother with the trouble of making Hollandaise (nor would I trust it if they did) there must be something similar they can offer even on the side to liven this thing up (and if you're thinking ketchup I'm calling the paddy wagon). 

Interestingly enough, at first when the McMuffin debuted (and some countries still might do this) they offered strawberry jam alongside it, just to add a potential sweetness to it. Jam isn't exactly what I had in mind here, but at least it's something.

 

 

Finally, the hash brown. It looks like a potato shoehorn, or a tongue. Or a piece of an unpainted picket fence.

Taking a bite... yeah it also tastes like a picket fence. Not particularly crispy at all, the potato flavour is pretty weak and fades very quickly... no seasoning whatsoever... a genuine disappointment. Even my low expectations (hopefully but wrongfully) expected a McDonald's hash brown to be semi-decent... it's just an oval of shredded and fried potato, how can you make that limp and boring? They found a way.

Next time I'm in the mood for something like this I'll check the discount freezer in the supermarket. This was three dollars, too. Madness.  

 

---

 

 

Overall. So one thing I found quite amusing, as I was leaving the McDonald's on Eastern near Coxwell, was the drive-thru situation. It was about 11:15 at this point, breakfast had given way to their regular menu... and just like a finger snap there was now a modest lineup in their drive-thru. When I'd arrived half an hour earlier? Barely an automobile soul in the parking lot with the drive-thru completely clear. It's like a bunch of people were driving around to nowhere, counting down the agonizing minutes until the McDonald's regular menu came on (at least that's what I like to imagine).

Look, you all know by now how McDonald's has never done it for me and the odds of me recommending anything they offer are only slightly higher than Donald Trump gaining a sense of humility (admit it, you can totally imagine him bragging about how he's the most humble person ever, "nobody's more humble than me...") Simply put, I've never understood the sincere love people have for the golden arches and that's just the way it is.              

However... that sausage McGriddle was indeed compelling enough for me to reserve most of my usual McDonald's slander. I liked how different it was... and though it's not likely I'll ever actively go out and order another one, I will tip my reviewer cap at the ingenuity of it. At least with the McGriddle I can understand its appeal as a guilty breakfast pleasure food, I can meet it there...whereas with almost anything else from McDonald's I'd much prefer gnawing on a couch cushion. 

And yeah McGriddle aside this breakfast here was extremely weak. Quite lifeless and rather manufactured tasting... with decent quality eggs elevating it into the realm of "actual food" at least. But this is food you merely eat without thinking about it, consumption for familiar sensation and sustenance rather than lasting enjoyment or experience. Still not a fan.            

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Binging With Breakfasts

There has been a reason/overall scheme to why these Tuesday reviews have featured so many breakfast items lately. Yes, I'd like to announce that coming soon will be an article ranking all of these breakfast sandwiches I've sampled! (plus a few others that alone didn't quite have enough for their own review). 

My criteria for what qualifies is loose as always, but to limit this from a list of hundreds (I already have an endless Pizza Quest, don't need another impossible mission) I'm only ranking places that have more than one location in Toronto. Places are allowed to have multiple entries, however, as long as they are distinct enough from one another. 

Stay tuned for that in the next few weeks! Of course, the hardest working Babish in the food videos business, Andrew Rea, did something similar when he compared a bunch of frozen breakfast sandwiches a while back. It's a good watch! May my experience be a more positive one...

 

   

 

Tuesday Tune

March was a very strange month... tends to be the case when you find yourself in a hospital bed upon the beginning turn into that calendar page. Factor in some additionally unexpected and blindsiding news a few days later that seriously rubbed me the wrong way personally... well I kinda feel like I have a pretty big chip on my shoulder as we enter these spring months. Nothing lasts forever anymore.

Hey though, don't worry dear reader... I won't take any of that out on you. Saving my bile-filled ammunition for the truly the grossest and most abhorrent foods we might stumble across here in this bizarre little corner of the interwebs... and here's a song that fits that mood. Until next time, stay safe, stay warm and most of all don't spill that mustard.  

 

 

This Week In Pizza: Zzavia

 

If ever somebody were to create an alphabetized ultimate directory of every single pizzeria in the history of human civilization... one has to figure "Zzavia" would be at the very bottom of such an endless list. Naturally I'm sure there is/has been some pizza joint somewhere named "Zzzzzz Pizza" (our pies are so filling they make you ready for bed!) but Zzavia has to be close behind that. Surely they've done this on purpose, no? Take away that extracurricular 'z' and you've got Zavia, which is an actual name in multiple languages (with varying spellings) possibly translating as "new house or home".   

Background on Zzavia's story is somewhat scarce. Most articles I could find about them cite the exact same Streets of Toronto piece (word for word) about a former Gusto 501 chef opening up this little pizzeria on Bayview Avenue... with that original SoT article not even mentioning that chef's full name either. Perhaps 'Zzavia' translates as "mysterious origin?" "Pizzeria with dubious beginnings?"

I'm goofing around here obviously. However they came to be, Zzavia opened up their brightly illuminated boxy little space in Leaside late last summer and have been slinging out pizzas of various styles and shapes ever since. While their slice options are prepared and served in the rectangular Roman style, their full pizzas are made in the circular Neapolitan way. 

I did not know they did two styles until after my visit, having assumed their Roman slices was their only thing... and while I like to be a completest about this stuff, even my madness isn't to the point of spending almost fifty bucks on two massive slices and an entire pizza. My actual paying job has been real awful slow lately, damnit! As such, you're only getting the square slices in this review, sorry. Hey, as a famous musician once sang, it's hip to be... frugal.

 

 

The inside of Zzavia is almost like an ice cream shop, or the entrance to a real estate opportunity... with its clean and shiny white walls and sparse decor or seating. There's a refrigerated pantry off to the side with shelves offering various drinks, salads and other prepared food items. 

Feeling hungry after a doctor's appointment (I'll live) I went for two slices: their Bastacosi (directly above) and a Fun Guy (I mean Funghi) slice... both of which are vegetarian offerings. This was not by design! Simply bad timing on this particular mid-afternoon since they had neither a pepperoni slice nor their Patata available (rosemary potatoes with sausage, smoked mozzarella and caramelized onions... I'd have tried that for sure!)

Instead, we've got a Bastacosi to start with (roughly translating as "that's enough", fitting name for a simple pizza) with tomato sauce, basil, fior di latte mozzarella, a dusting of parmesan and some little marinated baby half-tomatoes for good measure. 

One little touch I found smart: the cheese on this slice was in unmelted globs before I ordered it, resulting in the melt of it being quite freshly gooey and fresh after a brief trip in Zzavia's oven. This is a very lively tasting slice: there's a sweet acidity to both the tomato sauce and the little tomatoes (which are juicy and soft) with the shreds of basil adding to that sensation of garden freshness... while those globs of mozzarella cheese are near perfect in their clean, thick and light buttery texture. 

A nice dusting of parmesan adds a nice sharpness as well, and the crust has a solid crunch with a light hint of sourdough. All in all, not a typical go-to kind of slice for me but I was quite impressed with how natural tasting all of this was. Pretty good.

 

 

The mushroom (I mean Funghi) slice is not as big a success. As you can see it's a bit more well baked around those edges, going from what was a pleasant crunch on the Bastacosi into too much of a gritty struggle here. Especially on a reheat, the edges of this slice dried out tremendously and were a rough go (luckily I had some hummus to help it along, but points to Sunflower Kitchen for that, not Zzavia).

Flavour-wise, it's a fairly typical white mushroom pizza offering. I would've liked an additional kind of cheese, whether that be a blue or something creamier like a goat cheese or stracciatella... because the layer of mozzarella gets fairly repetitive (and isn't helped by how dry and over-baked this slice is). You do get a tiny hint of a rich truffle flavour within, sure, but it's very faded and this slice really is missing one more thing for it to really work taste-wise.

Bit of a disappointment, frankly. It smelled amazing out of the oven and was tasty enough while still warm. Once cold? Very stiff and challenging to bite through, while the flavours are overall fine but also flat and singular. A shame. 

 

 

How about a garlic dip? Zzavia offer dips for a dollar each, which considering several pizza joints now charge quadruple that... this be a bargain, yarr.

With this, you've got a dip with the consistency of caesar dressing (I was in fact initially worried they'd just bought a jar of Renee's and passed it off as a "garlic" dip). However, you get a distinct taste of raw garlic in here that I quite like, with enough gloopy creaminess ideal for dipping a crunchy chunk of crust. Maybe it is just a housemade salad dressing (it had a slight saltiness) but it's a pretty solid one whatever it is.

 

 

Overall! While I wouldn't say they're either re-imagining pizza or compelling their customers to do so (as their sign says) I will say that they make a quality rectangular slice, although getting one as fresh as possible is absolutely prudent. Their Bastacosi slice was truly terrific, the mushroom one very lacking and that staleness did not help the matter.

A shame I couldn't evaluate one of their full Neapolitan pizzas (I'm not made of airports) and so this review does feel somewhat incomplete. Perhaps sometime in the future I'll head back to Bayview Village and give that a try, possibly even write a blurb about it in another Grab Bag Edition of these pizza reviews. 

For now though, considering the strength of one slice and the muted taste and other flaws of the other... I'm going to award Zzavia a weak "B+". The overall quality of the ingredients is there and I think the positives (you got me to seriously enjoy a slice with only tomatoes and cheese, impressive) really do outweigh the negatives. They are worth a try! I'll hold an actual 'for sure' recommendation until I try their Neapolitan offering though. To be continued it seems.... ooooooo....                

The Tuesday Taste - The Heartbreak Chef

 

 

The cinematic after effects

of alcohol

have led me to believe

That there's nothing

more beautiful

than a face

as it starts to fade

From your memory 

 

Another Tuesday... another Taste. 

This week we're taking a reprieve from the apparent Tuesday review theme of 2025 (breakfast sandwiches) and veering back into a theme from... earlier 2025? Whatever... time for more fried chicken sandwiches! And hey, it's a fairly renowned one within the Toronto food scene at that. Gather around because it is time for a very long overdue look (I'd never even been!) at The Heartbreak Chef in Kensington Market. 

---

The Heartbreak Chef is the brainchild/alias of Chef Jerome Robinson. Robinson, who'd worked in restaurants for many years, first began what would eventually become THC through catering and doing popup kitchens for various events/festivals. Slowly but surely a strong social media following was built, the annual CNE and it's notoriously crazy food concoctions in particular being a perfect outlet for his wilder (and very photogenic) comfort food creations.

This amount of success grinding on the festival popup circuit eventually led to Robinson opening up a permanent location in 2020, first briefly in Parkdale before setting up a longer term home on Dundas West and drawing lineups from time to time (selling one day specials of five dollar sandwiches will do that). 

When in late 2023 it was announced Heartbreak Chef would be closing that Dundas West spot, a collective gasp went up amidst the Toronto food scene. It turned out to be a false alarm of course, as a new location on Baldwin Avenue in Kensington Market (taking over the same space Graffiti's Bar and Grill long occupied) opened almost immediately afterward. This was a way of coming around full circle for Chef Robinson, seeing as this was a crucial neighbourhood in his earlier catering days (collaborating with the old Bacon Nation restaurant for instance). 

 

 

On a pleasantly sunny Thursday afternoon I went with my longtime friend and occasional reviewing companion (she happens to live pretty close to there and was her suggestion) to at last try this most heartbreaking of cuisine preparer. 

 

          

I had to resist the temptation to take half a dozen photos of just the decorations inside: it is pretty darn cool in here and there's a lot to look at. Whether it be the framed artwork on one wall or an entire mural on the other, done by local artist Paul Glyn-Williams (also known as 'Sumartist'). Coolest of all however... an NBA Jam arcade machine! Right by the front door when you walk in, impossible to miss it. Essentially an omen of happy nostalgia that right away, this place is going to be easy to like.

 

 

Told ya.

It's a large enough space for about six tables, with seating for a dozen to maybe eighteen people? (might have to squeeze together on that one). Considering Heartbreak Chef started out right around the time of that pesky global pandemic, delivery and takeout were pretty crucial at the time for the young business and I imagine still are. Hey, one good thing about sandwiches: they usually travel well. 

 

 

My esteemed associate and I both ordered their regular Big Ass Fried Chicken Sandwich, with her side being the potato wedges you see above and my side dish a mac n'cheese we'll discuss in a moment. 

The photo doesn't quite capture how damn huge these wedges are! They're as thick as multiple fingers put together. There's a nice mild smokey seasoning on here (paprika?) and while not fried to the point of any particular crispiness these are loaded with lots of fluffy potato inside. That side dip you see in the corner is a must, itself giving off a sweet chipotle ranch-like taste (not to mention a break from the endless potato). 

 

     

Now here is a mac n'cheese that is just gushing to meet you. 

We don't cover too many mac n'cheeses on these weekly reviews, despite it being a dish I'm extremely fond of. I think a reason is that, well... most of the big fast food chicken places make pretty damn awful mac and cheese. When so many of them are so similar in their terribleness, what's the point? They all have that ultra fake powered cheese flavour that leaves your mouth as quickly as an exposed grifter fleeing town. You can taste how there's no thought put into it, just another side dish offered because it's something well known as being served alongside fried chicken... and it shows in the offensive blandness you get.

Now, we have encountered some macs and cheeses that surpass that very low bar. Cherry Street Bar-B-Que was fairly decent (though also leaning into that fake cheese taste) while Dang Smoke was indeed quite excellent... sharp, rich and creamy with bread crumbs on top as a nice touch. All I'm saying is... ordering mac and cheese from even a well regarded restaurant can be a gamble. It might be underwhelming, or it might be absolutely incredible.     

Here? Well, Heartbreak Chef is a case well on that latter side. For a side portion, this is loaded with both macaroni and cheese... nearly a separate meal in of itself. The flavour is... cheese! And lots of it. Vivid medium cheddary-ness that lingers wonderfully in the mouth, perfectly cooked pasta (my friend was insistent in how impressed she was on that note so I had to mention it) and a fantastically creamy, slightly goopy texture. Simple indeed, but deliciously exceptional. 

This is a mac n'cheese you really want to take your time with, enjoy each bite as that cheesy sensation invades your mouth. Anybody thinking of reaching for the ketchup surely deserves a lifetime ban.   

 

 

Now for the main attraction and it lives up to its moniker: this is a big ass chicken sandwich and yes, it is incredibly messy (the THC website even warns as much). It is dripping with those shreds of coleslaw and that spicy ranch-like sauce, while chunks of the chicken itself are also likely to escape on a particular bite (I strongly suggest not wearing white clothing). 

 

 

Within the realm of fried chicken sandwiches, this is not your classic 'ultra-crunchy super batter'... rather it's a gentler crispiness with less of a fried breaded taste and more a lightly oily one. The chicken itself has a tenderized consistency to it, even in the bits of darker meat (much like the less fatty parts of a drumstick), which while being chewier in some spots also really locks in a terrific chicken flavour in each bite.       

The composition of the sandwich especially hits the mark. A red cabbage slaw giving some bitter crunch, a spicy ranch sauce giving both a drippy zing and savoury taste, pickle slices because it's a fried chicken sandwich, and a nicely squishy potato bun to try (in vain) to hold all of this together in one piece. 

While I didn't completely like the texture of the tougher bites of the chicken, the overall flavour of this sandwich is just magnificent. Incredibly vivid, that light fry of the chicken lingers pleasantly within the oozing sour creaminess of the ranch and the bitter crunch of the slaw. This made me very curious about what their spicy sandwich might taste like...

 

  

...so that's exactly what I did! Yes indeed, a week later I found myself in Kensington Market again (I need to find a Colorado Rockies hat, don't ask) and so went back to Heartbreak Chef to try their "Likkle Dutty" sandwich. If you're curious/unsure, "likkle" means "little" in Jamaican Patois (seems pretty straightforward) while "dutty" translates as "dirty". Yes, this sandwich is essentially named the "Little Dirty". Bring it on! Also, dialects are fascinating... although the history of how many of them came about, particularly in the Carribean? Not quite as delightful.  

There are three key differences between the Big Ass sandwich and our Likkle Dutty here: first is the grilled pineapple ring you see above, second is a singular hunk of fried chicken rather than the two on the Big Ass, and third is a notable spread of a dark jerk sauce spread upon the inside of the top bun. 

Considering that the fried chicken on the Dirty One is pure white meat chicken all the way through, whereas the Big Ass had two separate chicken hunks... makes me wonder if that additional one for the bigger sandwich is usually a darker, more tenderized piece of chicken. Who knows? I mean, they probably do in their kitchen but all I know for sure is how this is still a sizeable sandwich here despite being the smaller option.      

On the first visit with my dear friend we'd been cautioned by the fella behind the counter that this Dutty sandwich was pretty spicy... so I was geared up for heat on this sequel visit. After a few bites... yeah it brings some good punch. Definitely a sneaky heat though you do taste it right away, with a very well rounded kind of earthy, almost leafy spice (like thyme and hot peppers blended together) along with subtle hints of onion. 

I like that the heat isn't totally overwhelming to the other flavours (the chicken itself isn't tossed in any sauce) yet the spice is quite potent despite such a small amount of it (just lightly spread on one of the buns). Indeed, having a tiny taste of it on my finger unleashed the full fire into my mouth... oh the things I do for these reviews. 

The grilled pineapple is also a terrific touch: helping to cut through and balance out the bitter and sour flavours and bring some brightness to this sandwich. I've discovered I can't really eat raw pineapple anymore because it irritates the inside of my mouth to the point of legitimate agony, but grilled and softened in this form is absolutely perfect... that light sweetness blends into the chicken and it's wonderful. 

 

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Overall! After two separate trips, two chicken sandwiches and an absolutely incredible mac n'cheese... yeah they're really bad don't go. Bah, I've used that misdirection joke too many times, haven't I...

Heartbreak Chef is indeed fantastic and I strongly recommend trying them if you have not done so yet. I wasn't super fond of the potato wedges (they were just so big) but again that mac and cheese was otherworldly... it didn't need green onions or bacon or anything extra for every bite to be absolutely wonderful cheesey heaven (and once again if you even think of ketchup they will find you, Liam Neeson style).

I definitely preferred the spicier sandwich to the regular one: the Likkle Dutty just has a little bit more going on, plus both have that crucial ranch and red slaw on them anyhow... you're really just swapping the pickle slices for the pineapple. Plus I really like how the smaller sandwich is still a very respectable size, using the exact same soft potato bun even (the Big Ass just has the extra piece of chicken). 

These are just some delicious fried chicken sandwiches and while maaaaaybe not my standalone favourite one that I've reviewed here in Toronto, it's right up there with the other top notch ones I've likewise really liked such as Daddy's or Birdie's. They can all share the imaginary podium I've created in my mind. 

They're great! And the vibes of the place are fun and cool (Mr. Chef Heartbreak himself was indeed there both times I went, always hands on in the kitchen and being super friendly with everybody, asking how they liked his food... you can tell when a place has genuine positive comradery). Next time you're wandering near Chinatown definitely check em out.         

Also a good read down here:

https://www.thestar.com/life/together/places/toronto-chef-jerome-robinson-chooses-the-city-s-most-delicious-and-indulgent-fried-food/article_6dd51f08-03c2-591d-bc9c-23ee618826fa.html   

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Tank You Very Much

It's been a rough season in Toronto Raptors Land, which of course has been the plan all along. The worse their W-L record, the higher their probability at snagging a high draft pick and the opportunity to bring in a potentially franchise changing player (you know, somebody you can really plant your Flagg on). As such, every year you'll have at least a few NBA teams that have no interest in being even somewhat competitive as they drive their season into a ditch in hopes of scoring lottery balls.

Thing is, this 2024/2025 season has seen tanking to degrees which we've never seen. You've got a thirty team league wherein a third of those teams have actively been trying to lose games with months still left in the season. It ain't great for any kind of exciting late season playoff push, nor is it great for the overall product of NBA basketball... all because it's a smarter long-term move for these franchises to punt a season and hope for draft luck rather than make a push and most likely get obliterated in the first round of the playoffs.

Not good! The excellent Joseph Casicaro of The Score (RIP the awesome Pound The Rock podcast) has a few ideas how the NBA could curb this untenable trend of so many teams tanking, and it's a good read. Check it out:

 

https://www.thescore.com/news/3247527

 

Tuesday Tune

This album came out at a classic teenage crossroads time in my life. I was taking an extra year of high school despite already graduating to improve my marks, while a bunch of friends from my grade had already gone off to university in different cities. I'd just started playing bass guitar, had way too much free time since I was only taking four classes (instead of the typical seven or eight) and so would often sit in the hallways of Jarvis C.I. playing my old black and white Squire or just listening to albums on my Discman, Chemical City being one of that time.

Geez, this album is almost twenty years old now? I've IDed people younger than this record. But it holds up just fine. Mindflood is still an absolute psychedelic rock trip, and this song (the closer) tugs at ye ol' heartstrings for sure. 

 

 

That's all for another week. There is some fun stuff planned on this very webzone over the next month, so definitely stay tuned for that. Some articles of the ranking variety, indeed. Until those, stay safe, stay warm in this lousy Smarch weather and most of all don't spill that mustard.